


rewrite

by jaera



Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: 2park, Angst, College AU, Deephwi, Established Relationship, First Love, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, I love Jinhwi, Kinda, M/M, Minor Kang Daniel, Minor Kim Jaehwan, Minor Park Jihoon/Park Woojin, confident Daehwi, constipated Jinyoung, donut hate me, i donut do angst, implied Ong Seongwu/HwangMinhyun, jinhwi, love square, maybe uwu, no not really, trust me this will have a happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-09-25 09:26:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 58,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17118728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaera/pseuds/jaera
Summary: “Hi, nice to meet you. You’re very much how I like my coffee – sweet andhot.”; Or alternatively:Jinyoung unexpectedly rewritestheirstory.





	1. Destiny

**Author's Note:**

> !!! First chapter is just a prologue! Real story will start next chapter !!!
> 
> We are days away from the impending 'D', but I will still post this in hopes that we will still stay as Wannables till the *nd.  
> It's not 'End', it's 'AND'.
> 
> The plot of this story was Prompted by one of my good Jinhwi friends, Delmar. It’s been long overdue, but here we are!
> 
> Also, this story is dedicated to the loveliest JinHwi moots I've met:  
> Delmar, Jinky, & Betty (there are a lot more bcos all JinHwi stans are lovely 🤡)  
> I hope we’ll stay long. Mama loves you!
> 
> PS: As JinHwi shippers, please donut hate me for this story.  
> (you will know why soon)  
> I love you all!  
> xoxo

[Destiny](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1mYzHcp4h5w)

 

* * *

 

When Jinyoung first saw _him_ , he was barely 7 and oblivious to the consequences of talking to strangers. Actually, Jinyoung knew it, but a kid in an orange sweater and blue overalls seated on a swing by himself wasn’t exactly what Jinyoung considered as harmful.

If any, maybe Jinyoung trudging over to the swings without any word is actually what could be considered as creepy, but he paid no heed to it and sat at the empty spot next to the small boy. Jinyoung had been in their neighborhood for his whole 6 years of living and he wasn’t about to be fazed just because a new face suddenly appeared at his hangout place.

_I’m 6 years old now, no one can stop me!_

The boy looked at him, watched as he started swinging too. Jinyoung ignored it for the first couple of seconds but contrary to his fixated stoic countenance, his heart was quite the opposite. “Uhm,” Jinyoung mumbled, suddenly finding it hard to connect the words inside his head.

The boy stopped swinging, hopped off of his seat in one swift motion and stood right in front of him. Jinyoung had to stop swinging too lest he hits him, and with an annoyed expression, he said, “what are you doing?”

The boy only laughed and grabbed his hand gently. “Let’s play?”

When he touched the boy’s hand, Jinyoung’s face softened up and he felt a slight giddiness in his heart. He nodded, completely forgetting his earlier sentiments and holding on to the boy’s hand tightly. “Okay.”

Jinyoung learned of the boy’s name, Daehyun, immediately but didn’t know until years later of who he’ll exactly be in his life.

 

-

 

It had been years since Jinyoung had met up with _him_. Jinyoung considered him as his only and best friend despite them coming from different schools and the other being a year younger. They had spent their childhood years together, went to places together, met up every day at the park where they first met, but it wasn’t until they’ve graduated from primary school that Jinyoung learned that his best friend wasn’t who he thought he was.

“Jinyoung-hyung, have I told you that I’m not really Daehyun?”

Jinyoung only looked at him inquisitively. “What do you mean you’re not Daehyun?”

“My real name is not Daehyun.” He chuckled. “I gave you a fake name when we first met since my mom told me not to talk to strangers.”

Jinyoung pursed his lips, suddenly feeling guilty of not doing the same thing.

“That’s unfair… you know my real name.” Jinyoung frowned. “What’s your real name then?”

He only smiled at Jinyoung before saying, “When my heart is ready, I will let you know my real name then.”

Jinyoung just nodded even though he felt cheated and he didn’t really quite understand what the boy meant.

Jinyoung isn’t very vocal and to other people, he could never make a conversation without being awkward and seeming like a fool. Yet if it’s with the younger, even the proper way of eating string cheese became a profound debate.

If it’s with the younger, even a simple silent exchange of looks made way for a meaningful discussion.

They had this special kind of friendship that even as they were only able to sit beside each other in silence, they still felt at ease. They still felt comfortable.

Jinyoung didn’t know how it was for the younger, but to him, despite not knowing the younger’s real name, the younger was akin to a home – one of whom he could lay his guards down, one of whom he knew will accept him no matter what the circumstances were.

“Do you want to go to the festival with me, hyung?”

Jinyoung turned to _him_ in query, seeing the spoonful of chocolate ice cream the boy was holding hanging in mid-air. “Which festival?”

“Haeeundae festival.”

“Sure.” Jinyoung accepted and ate the ice cream but suddenly choked after once he realized something. “Wait, isn’t that in Busan?”

 _He_ chuckled, patting Jinyoung’s back as he spoke. “It _is_ in Busan.”

Jinyoung handed over their shared ice cream to him and took a big gulp from his water. They were at the park again for their usual after school rendezvous. It was hot that day and the younger surprised Jinyoung with a small tub of ice cream of which they shared. Jinyoung wasn’t really fond of ice creams but he liked the fact that he could share it with him.

Just like how the younger was ready to share his real name too.

“I think… I’m ready to let you know my real name.” the younger told him, sporting a different kind of glimmer in his eyes – one that was entirely novel but wasn’t too foreign.

And in the summer of their second year in middle school did Jinyoung only understand what the younger meant by what he said two years ago.

Jinyoung had thought of it before, had considered how his feelings had changed during the course of time they’ve shared and how a part of him desired to change even how their relationship was. But he never made any action to it, inhibited by the possibility of harming what they had grown.

Unknowing that the younger actually felt the same way too.

_From strangers to friends. From friends to partners._

“Okay.” Jinyoung agreed.

The younger beamed at him as he fed Jinyoung another spoonful of ice cream. “Let’s meet up here next Saturday around 9 in the morning and then we’ll go to Busan together.” The younger told him excitedly and Jinyoung just nodded.

Jinyoung then realized that they might be the same.

Maybe his heart was ready too.

 

-

 

Jinyoung arrived at the park around 8:50, 10 mins before their designated time. He placed his back pack down on the bench and sat beside it, sending a quick text message to his special friend who was still named as Daehyun.

 

I’m already here 😊  
**8:52**

 

Jinyoung didn’t know where he lived, but they’ve talked about it in one of their previous conversations. Apparently, the park was just nearby his house – just like how it was for Jinyoung’s – so it’s the midpoint between them two. Jinyoung looked at the empty inbox of his phone and guessed that maybe the younger was already on his way which was why he wasn’t replying.

Although contrary to his assumptions, even as it was already 9:15, there still weren’t any messages.

 

Dae, where are you?  
**9:20**

Are you still coming?  
**9:40**

I’m still waiting for you  
Please answer me ;;  
**10:12**

 

Jinyoung sent a lot of messages, but even after an hour and a half, there wasn’t any reply, so he picked up his bag and went back home. He reckoned that something came up so the younger couldn’t come. Jinyoung tried to understand and kept on a look out for his phone in case the boy calls or sends a message.

But even as the day ended, not a single message nor call came.

Or even on the days that followed.

Jinyoung didn’t miss sending a message or try to call the younger’s number every day, but he didn’t receive any response. It was only after a month of trying to reach out to him did the network operator tell him that the line was out of service.

It was only after a month that he realized that maybe Daehyun really might be gone.

Jinyoung still tried to go back to the park at the same time they usually met after school, but as months passed, his visits to the park lessened and lessened as not even once had he seen any trace of the younger. Jinyoung didn’t want to stop hoping, he didn’t want to let go of the feelings that had already blossomed within him.

But waiting for someone whose return he wasn’t even sure of was like drinking a poison, killing Jinyoung’s heart with each day that passed of him knowing nothing.

_From strangers to friends. From friends to strangers._

Despite wanting to continue, despite wanting to keep waiting, after a year, Jinyoung finally came to accept the fact that _he_ really is gone.

Jinyoung perished any remaining flame of hope in his heart. He stopped going back to the park. He stopped sending messages to his number.

Jinyoung stopped thinking about _him_.

He buried the times they were together. He dropped the experiences they shared.

And despite his heart saying no, Jinyoung finally let it go.

Gone before it could even start… the memory of his first love.


	2. Awake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \- Jinyoung does _not_ do blushes (or so he says).  
> \- Daehwi tries to test if his guns still work (and it still does).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas!  
> Here's the first real chapter.  
> All chapters will be separated into two POVs (for Jinyoung and Daehwi) so it'll be long.  
> I was planning to separate them into chapters (like for WMID) but then it'll kind of ruin the flow of each chapter so might as well put them together.
> 
> Enjoy for now uwu

 

[Awake](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AOyCv65PuEA)

* * *

 

_He’s here._

Jinyoung sucks in a breathe, seeing a familiar raven head all the way in the middle of the room, deeply engaged in a conversation with his friends – yet again.

The apparent reason for Jinyoung’s disconcertion. The source of his untypical blush.

And just like the usual, Jinyoung ignores the eyes of his classmates as he struts inside the room, choosing a seat at the very back to avoid unnecessary interactions.

Or maybe he just wants to erase the memory in his head (but is obviously failing), of the peculiar first meeting he had with his bizarre classmate, Lee Daehwi.

_“Hi, nice to meet you, Bae Jinyoung. You’re very much how I like my coffee – sweet and hot.”_

According to statistics, when individuals were asked when is the best time to meet new people, majority answered college. When asked why, it is because when you’re in elementary, you’re just too young to care about anything else other than playing. In middle school, meeting new people is not even an option since almost 99% of the teenage population are too focused in their excruciating and adverse war against puberty (1% goes to those blessed individuals who are just born with superior genes that never had a shameless past in their lives – Jinyoung may or may not be included). In high school, it’s all about the preparation for entrance exams that one won’t even have time for anything else.

Whereas in college, you get to break free from everything – from childhood ignorance, from insufferable puberty, from hellish entrance exams. Yes, college is notorious for causing people to have sleepless nights and terrible hangovers, but it’s also the time where people get to go out into the world, meet new people and find out who they really are as individuals.

College is the time to start anew.

But then what if one doesn’t want to start anew? What if one doesn’t really want to break free into the world?

What if one doesn’t even want to meet new people?

Jinyoung sighs, his eyes internally rolling as he ducks his head down on his desk, contemplating how people managed to survive college. He only barely finished a month into the semester and he already feels like quitting. Not because of too much works or sleepless nights (heck, he’s only a freshman), but because he hates socializing. Much more so when he’s forced to socialize with people of the same age – an everyday adversity he has to face while in uni.

More than being an introvert, Jinyoung himself just thinks that socialization is just a nuisance. Ever since he was still a kid, he’s just simply always tired of his life (he doesn’t work; he just lacks exercise and stamina) and just thinks that human interaction in general is too much work and full of hypocrisy.

For example, how can people always greet each other a good morning with such bright smiles on their faces and expect others to do the same? What if the morning is not good? What if his morning sucks? Does he still have to say good morning too? With a smile on his face as well? Can’t they just say it by themselves and go?

Then again, morning greetings have always been a hassle to him, especially since there is never a good thing in the mornings anyway – not when you’re a sleepless and broke college student who’s barely getting his shit together (Jinyoung is only a freshman though, who can a bit overdramatic when it comes to things and no, he is not sleepless and broke… _yet_ ).

Don’t get him wrong. He’s just simply not _that_ invested into his social life unlike most college students. He’s attending university to study anyway, and cordialness isn’t included in the requirements of the school when he applied.

And besides… _why would I even bother with people who I know will only leave?_

On the brighter side (if there is even any in his very bland character), Jinyoung doesn’t really hate people.

Okay, maybe he does, but not _that_ much _._

If he thinks about it carefully, there could be some _exceptions_.

_“Hi, I’m Lee Daehwi. I major in Math,” the male introduces himself, putting out his hand for Jinyoung. “And you?”_

_“Dae… hwi?” Jinyoung scans his face in both shock and confusion for a few excruciating minutes._

_Shock because Jinyoung knows his face; confusion since he doesn’t know his name._

_He drops his gaze to Daehwi’s hand though, when the latter grabs his instead to shake it. Jinyoung had no other choice but to answer back. “B-Bae Jinyoung. Also a Math Major.”_

_“Hi, nice to meet you, Bae Jinyoung.” Daehwi grins at him, eyes turning into slits and showcasing his big (and perfect) white pearls as he says, “You’re very much how I like my coffee – sweet and hot.”_

Between Daehwi’s excited smile and Jinyoung’s stony expression, the latter was the first to break as his eyes twitch involuntarily, ears and face heating up due to reasons he refuses to admit.

Jinyoung’s face reenacts the memory, noticeable redness blooming in his cheeks.

_What the fuck are you blushing for, Bae Jinyoung?_

He slaps his face, willing himself to come to his senses, but only proves to be futile as his eyes just keep on coming back to the raven headed boy’s back.

For a moment he wonders (and perhaps also admires) how much patience the boy has for putting up with all the social interaction that is being forced on him. He’s currently surrounded by his two posies again (he’s not exactly sure who they are – when was he ever?), giggling and laughing about things that Jinyoung can only imagine.

_But is he really being forced though?_

Lee Daehwi, a fellow freshman together with Jinyoung in the Science Department. Also known as the notorious social butterfly who majors in Math. He’s pretty famous in their department for being one of the top notchers of their university’s entrance exam, having an average of 98.99%. He may not be the most handsome in their department but his looks is not to be underestimated as well. Exceeding the usual standards of adorable, literally everyone in their department – both faculty members and students alike – coos at Daehwi. Jinyoung doesn’t even wonder why since more than being handsome, Daehwi’s looks lean more towards cute and charming. Even Jinyoung finds him like such and he’s not one to easily notice other people aside from his friends (then again, Jinyoung, basically, does _not_ really have that many friends).

Having all of their classes together (Jinyoung doesn’t know whether he should be thankful or not), Jinyoung has seen him enough to know that Daehwi himself is perfectly well aware of this as never had he seen the male all by himself. 100% of the times that Jinyoung saw him (not that he’s deliberately looking for him), it’s either he’s talking to one of their professors or just chatting with one of his hundreds of friends.

If there is only an award that he could give to the said boy, Jinyoung would, by all means. Honestly, even he’s confused why until now, Daehwi still hasn’t received a Mr. Congeniality medal from their department.

_If I can, I would’ve given it to him a long time ago._

Jinyoung has seen individuals like him, have met people who just live for the affection of many. An outgoing person who is naturally close to a lot, and Jinyoung, being his secluded self, doesn’t really like those kind of people. More than the fact that he hates people in general, he just doesn’t get how they manage to survive with too much social interaction – especially Daehwi.

If it was Jinyoung, he would’ve already overheated. Just looking at Daehwi makes him feel like combusting.

Or maybe it’s just Daehwi alone that makes him feel like he’s going to combust.

Which is definitely not a good sign. Not when Daehwi’s the epitome of the kind of person that Jinyoung would tend to avoid – an outgoing person who is practically a walking sunshine, charging everything with his brightness.

An adorable and very positive individual who piques the interest of everybody within his sphere.

_Very much like him._

Jinyoung shakes his head, baffled and horrified (and maybe scared) with the thoughts of the Daehwi entering his mind.

“Whatcha doing, Jinyoungie?”

Jinyoung freezes, his head slowly turning as he sees Daehwi taking the seat beside him. He panics, his brain unknowingly a mess as he tries to deduce an explanation on why the devil himself (who is as bright as the sun) suddenly materialized right beside him.

“I… uh…”

It was then that Jinyoung’s articulation (and brain) is suddenly reported missing.

“You’re funny!” Daehwi chuckles and all Jinyoung wants is for their damn professor to hurry the fuck up and start their lesson so he can continue minding his own business and stop humiliating himself in front of his classmate who he has complex thoughts for.

_What complex thoughts are you talking about._

Oh and to stop himself from blushing without reason because Bae Jinyoung does _not_ do blushes.

Fortunately, there is still a God and he is real and he goes by the name of Mr. Hwang who decides it’s high time to take a pause from the weird tension going on between him and his co teacher Mr. Ong and finally start the day’s lecture.

Unfortunately though, Jinyoung is instilled with the unsolved question of why Lee Daehwi keeps on squeezing into his closed off sphere. Joking with him with a pickup line (at their very first meeting at that!) and now leaving his posies to sit beside Jinyoung – all of his actions are so questionable that Jinyoung doesn’t absorb any of Mr. Hwang’s words and waste a goddamn hour of lecture.

But the real question is, despite his complaints and puzzlement, why does Jinyoung still let Daehwi do it? If he really dislikes people like Daehwi, then he would’ve blocked off all attempts from the boy already.

But he didn’t. Not before and certainly, not now.

_But why?_

Jinyoung’s brain, despite himself, still goes back and forth between the reasons he could think of as to why he doesn’t seem to have the capability to reject Daehwi during the whole discussion. There is only one thing he can think of, one thing that has been bugging him since the first moment he saw Daehwi, but he refuses to accept it because it was just plain unreasonable.

Especially since it was also impossible.  

_No, that child is long gone, Jinyoung. Stop deluding yourself._

_They just look pretty similar… but he’s different._

_He’s just being nice to you, that’s why you can’t reject him and you’re okay with nice people._

_Yes, Jinyoung. That’s only the only reason._

_But then… why do you keep on blushing whenever you talk to him?_

Jinyoung internally groans, hating the voices that were arguing in his head. But as if his internal woes were heard, Mr. Hwang suddenly announces that their class is dismissed.

And being perfectly aware of how his mental prowess is in danger of deteriorating whenever he so much as stays within a meter of Daehwi, Jinyoung quickly hoists his bag and dashes out through the back door.

“Jinyoung!”

But alas, he is not fast enough to escape from the boy’s clutches.

“Daehwi,” he greets, stopping on his tracks as he sees the boy walking up to him. “Do you… need something from me?”

Daehwi shakes his head with his signature eyeless smile. “Nothing, I was just wondering if you’re going home now?”

Jinyoung’s brain calculates yet again, confused with Daehwi’s question. “I…” _Stop stuttering, you fool!_ “If you don’t need anything then I’m going now.” Jinyoung simply says, choosing to ignore his brain’s lack of common sense.

“Er, okay.” Daehwi nods. “See you later!”

Cue in Daehwi’s wink, followed by Jinyoung’s inevitable blush.

“Were you actually talking to someone?”

Jinyoung meets a caramel brown haired man’s amused smile once he reaches the hallway, followed by his mocking question. “You, Bae Jinyoung, were actually talking to one of your classmates?”

_Jihoon._

Park Jihoon. One year older, and also a student in SNU majoring in theater arts. One of Jinyoung’s very few (or _only_ ) friends in the university. Also his senior since high school.

The man named Jihoon smiles, turns to look back at the room where Jinyoung came from and waves.

Jinyoung turns to his back and sees a mildly confused Daehwi waving back. In an attempt to salvage any remaining dignity he has left, Jinyoung grabs Jihoon’s hand and pulls him away from the scene. There is definitely no way that he’s going to let Jihoon meet Daehwi. The least he would want now is to have misunderstandings and more unnecessary questions.

“Hey, what’s the rush for?” Jihoon asks, allowing himself to be dragged by the younger but not without giving one last smile to Daehwi. Looking back at Jinyoung, he adds, “who was that anyway?”

“No one. Just a classmate.”

Once they reach the building lobby, Jihoon stops Jinyoung. “I figured as much since you’re a loser who only has me anyway.”

Jinyoung frowns in return but eventually lets out an airy laughter once Jihoon locks their arms together. “Yeah, I only have you. Happy now?”

Jihoon nods with a bright grin before tugging on the younger’s arm to continue walking. “Come on, let’s eat. I’m starved.”

_Yes, I’m happy as long as I have you._

* * *

 

I think  
I’m in love  
**11:11**

 

What  
**11:12**

 

Daehwi had always been excited to go back to South Korea to study and live there for good. He had grew up watching Korean dramas and had fallen in love with their culture – with the fantasy and excitement that came with it. Living in America gave him a better life, but nothing can still compare to his home country after all.

Daehwi’s mom knows this very well, having taken care of him all by herself since he was young. And despite the initial woes that comes with being a mother, she ultimately lets Daehwi go back to South Korea all by himself (also partly because she is busy being an entrepreneur and she can’t stay with him for a long time).

Fortunately, Daehwi had been thorough during high school and had earned enough credits to get accepted into his dream university. As soon as he got his acceptance letter, he immediately flew to South Korea and arranged the requirements himself.

It was kind of a hassle and a bit complicated since he wasn’t used to how things work in South Korea yet, but he tells himself that everything will work out in the end and that he’ll eventually get to live his own drama like life – to study in his dream university, meet new friends, experience hangovers and sleepless nights (he had been a good boy in America, bless him), and most especially, to finally water his very dry and desiccated love life.

Daehwi is not new to dating and had been in a few relationships before, but it all didn’t work out in the end due to reasons Daehwi himself isn’t even sure of, but that doesn’t mean that he’s ready to give up just yet.

Daehwi is a guilty hopeless romantic like that after all.

Which is why he immediately takes cover behind a stone pillar not far from the registrar’s office once he spots his Adonis in the making. Daehwi had just finished getting his semester schedule from the registrar’s office but stops dead on his tracks when he comes across a man so good looking, he felt like his eyes had just been sprayed with holy water.

Daehwi follows the man without hesitation of course, ignoring Woojin’s reply in the process, since there is no way that he is going to let this fine young man pass by that easily. Once he is situated in a good hiding place though (uncaring of the weird stares he was receiving), he comes to a conclusion that gods don’t always wear fancy robes or golden belts, nor do they wear ornate and expensive looking leaf bands on their heads.

Sometimes they just wear ugly looking neon orange hoodies and black overused baggy jogger pants. Sometimes they just like to use oversized cheap and tacky bucket hats that almost swallows their small and miniature (but absolutely _zesty_ ) faces.

And despite their questionable taste in fashion, it doesn’t degrade nor vitiate their impeccable force nonetheless.

Heck, it even amplifies it.

_It’s a good day to fall in love._

_-_

“Why don’t you just dorm with me instead? Living by yourself is hard.” Daehwi hears his cousin, Woojin, and starts to turn on his selective hearing, knowing very well that the latter is about to give him another lecture. “It might be fun at first, but believe me, sooner or later you’ll wish you didn’t leave your mom’s house.”

It was already half an hour past 10. Daehwi is squeezed beside Woojin on his bed, inside his dorm room, tucked underneath a duvet which the older keeps on hogging all to himself. Daehwi wants to scream at Woojin, to ask how can he not realize that Daehwi is damn cold and in need of protection from the low temperature, but he chooses not to, having the decency to behave especially since Woojin has been taking good care of him for the past two weeks – ever since Daehwi came to South Korea – while his dorm unit is still getting readied.

“I want to try living by myself, okay?” Daehwi answers. “I can perfectly handle myself, thank you very much.”

Daehwi’s mom actually wanted him to live with Woojin instead of dorming by himself. Never had Mrs. Lee separated from her son before so the worry would be really there, and Daehwi understand this very well. However, he can’t just keep on relying on other people forever. He’s twenty years old. It’s high time for him to finally try being independent and learn the ways to adulthood through experience.

“You can’t even cook an egg for your dear life, what makes you think you can last a day?” Woojin snorts, fiddling with his phone and ignoring the glare Daehwi was directing at him.

“Stop being a killjoy. It’ll be exciting, I bet.”

_My college life will be exciting alright, especially with Mr. Adonis by my side._

Daehwi suddenly pulls up a grin, a thought suddenly taking over his mind and making him feel hopeful. “Who knows, Mr. Adonis might be from the same dorm!”

“Mr. Adonis, really?” Woojin looks at him blankly for a couple of seconds, before cracking into laughter all the while deflecting all of Daehwi’s attempts to smock his face with a pillow. “Dream about being dorm mates with him when you have even at least one letter of his name!”

Daehwi just rolls his eyes, turns to his back and silently laments, knowing very well that Woojin has all the rights to mock him and his superior stupidity. He had his eyes all focused on his man earlier that morning, studying each and every trace of his very finely crafted face (even his subpar getup). Daehwi’s eyes are actually bad, but it didn’t hinder him from his agenda nonetheless, even going as far as to daydream and be torn whether to use red roses or pink stargazers as the main decorations for their wedding (since _red roses are too mainstream and pink stargazers are just… too pink)._

But he snaps out of his reverie upon realizing a very important thing: his mom wouldn’t appreciate him being wed to a man whose name he doesn’t even know of.

So Daehwi decides to square the fuck up and be a man that his mom can be proud of by catching his own man then and there. Although before he can even prepare himself and his pickup line, his face falls, utterly disappointed as his man is suddenly nowhere to be found, disappearing from the altar and leaving Daehwi in sorrow all by himself inside the Church in his dreams.  

“I just don’t get how you could lose him when you’re already watching his every move.” Woojin says as he continues to play, ignoring the 9th disappointed sigh from his cousin – yes, he had been unconsciously counting. “If I were you, I would’ve already gotten his number by now.”

Daehwi gives him an incredulous look, obviously not buying any of Woojin’s bullshits. “Oh really? Then how come you’re still pining for your crush until now?” Daehwi questions, unimpressed. “It’s been what, a year? And you’re still stuck with just knowing his name, major – possibly schedule since you’re a stalker like that – and playing that stupid game just because you saw him playing it once? Wow. Impressive.”

“Then what do you want me to do? Confess to him?”

Daehwi looks at him in incredulity. “I mean… _duh_.”

“If I can I would’ve done that a long time ago, but I can’t!” Woojin hisses.

“Why not?”

“Because he has a boyfriend!”

“I—that…” Daehwi starts by opening his mouth to say something, but decides otherwise. “I’m actually not even surprised anymore since liking someone who has a boyfriend already is definitely something only _you_ would do.”

“I didn’t ask for your opinion, you ungrateful freeloader.” Woojin hisses, nudging Daehwi with his elbow in an attempt for a small revenge. “Also, _Love! Live_ is only for intellectuals so you would never understand.”

“Intellectual your face.” Daehwi retorts. “Well, unlike you, I’m not a coward gay and I swear, I’ll have Mr. Adonis right in the palm of my hands by the end of this year.”

“I’ll treat you to barbecue five times if that happens.” Woojin smirks, confidence boosting up as he sees Daehwi’s annoyed face. “And if you don’t, you’ll be the one treating me instead.”

“Deal.”

Daehwi sees the clock on the wall – 11:11 – and immediately channels all of his remaining luck for this year since he’ll surely need it.

_Please let me be classmates with Mr. Adonis!_

He doesn’t even care about the bet he has with Woojin. All Daehwi wants is to just get to know his man and go straight to the wedding hall – okay, maybe go on a date with him first if Mr. Adonis thinks he’s taking it too fast.

Asking Mr. Adonis to be classmates with Daehwi is too much to ask and he knows it. Daehwi is like wishing for a cold day in hell being that there are at least 10 or more departments in their university, and at least a thousand of students each. Even being from the same department would already be considered as a miracle.

But then Daehwi is a devote Christian and he knows that God is real.

And God loves all people, with no bias nor prejudice, including people who are hopelessly in love like Daehwi.

Even though he lost Mr. Adonis back when he first saw him in the campus (because life is a bitch and choosing between Red Roses and Pink Stargazers needs time) and the chances of them being from the same department or even major is at least only 10%, the heavens still appear to be on his side as the moment he steps inside their building’s auditorium for their freshmen orientation the week after, he immediately spots a chocolate brown headed miniature faced being who exudes nothing but both zest and ambiguity, riling up Daehwi and his thirst for success.

Success in getting to finally know the real name of Mr. Adonis.

 _“Hi, I’m Lee Daehwi. I major in Math,”_ Daehwi didn’t waste any time as he immediately saunters up to his zesty man, putting on his hundred watt smile as he introduces himself. _“And you?”_

“ _Dae… hwi?”_ Mr. Adonis looks at him for a moment, as if gauging and checking Daehwi’s hand before shaking it. “ _B-Bae Jinyoung. Also a Math Major.”_

Daehwi internally praises himself for using a hand cream earlier that day, followed by the words he had long wanted to tell his special zesty man.

_“Hi, nice to meet you, Bae Jinyoung. You’re very much how I like my coffee – sweet and hot.”_

Daehwi isn’t really used to trying to court someone. He may not have been in a lot of relationships – only a couple of cute teenage flings and such – but people would always go after him and not him going after them. It would always be them trying to win over his affection, vying for his undivided attention. He would always be the one wanted, not him wanting.

So by using a cheesy pickup line on his Adonis, who is now going to be called with just an equally charming name, Bae Jinyoung, Daehwi felt like he was going to war without any proper knowledge of how to actually use his weapon. He had never done this before and had never initiated being aggressive with someone so he was a tad doubtful if it would even work (since his cuteness can only do so much).

But then two pair of warm chocolate eyes flickered, followed by the blooming of the two reddest roses in the peak of spring.

_Bae Jinyoung’s inhibited._

Daehwi didn’t believe it at first, of how a mere pickup line would work on a recluse and very stoic Bae Jinyoung. They might not have met properly immediately but they are still classmates (Daehwi reminds himself to thank their dean for giving hope to his very parched love life), so Daehwi had enough time to observe and get an impression of how Jinyoung really is.

According to Daehwi’s observation, Jinyoung doesn’t really have that much friends despite him being famous for his god tier looks. A lot of people always try to come up to him, but those people won’t even last minutes before they disperse (which Daehwi is kind of thankful for since he doesn’t need to do much to guard his man). Most of the time, Daehwi would always see him by himself, having this signature blank (but still very foxy) countenance on, looking like he doesn’t give a shit about anything. Which might as well be true, seeing as he barely makes it to class on time and is always the first one who leaves. Daehwi couldn’t further his research though, since there really isn’t that much resources available without him having to follow Jinyoung around (and he doesn’t want to stalk his man since he knows better than to act like the desperate Woojin).

So Daehwi tries to test the waters, checking to see if his guns still work.

He gives a smile to Jinyoung. The same eyeless smile that makes his jaw hurt and to his surprise, the eye flicker and red roses reappear, followed by the gentlest nod and possibly a small smile that has Daehwi feeling soft all over.

He takes into account that he is extremely biased and that his very wild and active imagination might have already added on to his judgment (especially the part where Jinyoung nodded gently and gave him a small smile) but at least, he has a lead now. He now knows that it’s not exactly futile and there is hope for him.

If Jinyoung’s unexpected display of inhibition isn’t a sign of hope, then Daehwi doesn’t know what is.

And thus, Daehwi confirms on one fine spring day that he does know how to use his weapons and decides that it’s safe to move on forward with his plan.

_Let’s go, plan LTE!_

“Whatcha doing, Jinyoungie?”

Daehwi blatantly skips to Jinyoung’s place after excusing himself from his friends and situates himself right next to the male. He thanks Jinyoung internally for being a bit intimidating so he didn’t need to ask anybody to switch sits with him.

Daehwi almost thinks that Jinyoung being surprised with his presence is just a work of his imagination, but the latter’s _cute_ stutter only solidifies his assumption. “I… uh…”

_Jesus, Bae Jinyoung, you’re hot, you’re adorable, you’re cute, you’re precious—_

“You’re funny!”

Daehwi blurts out, pinching himself for his momentary weakness and letting his emotions get the best of his slippery tongue.

_Seriously, Daehwi? Funny? He didn’t even crack a joke? He only stuttered?_

Daehwi overshadows his subtle mini panic with a chuckle, hoping that it diverts Jinyoung’s attention and that he doesn’t take offense from it. Fortunately, their professor saves him by finally starting his lecture so he didn’t need to do much damage control, and for the whole duration of their lecture, Jinyoung keeps focused towards the front.

Albeit, as usual, after the lecture, he immediately flees again, speed walking out of the lecture room.

But Daehwi, of course, wouldn’t let this chance simply pass by.

“Jinyoung!”

Jinyoung stops and turns, looking back at Daehwi with a raised eyebrow. “Daehwi,” Jinyoung calls him and Daehwi feels like he’s listening to the sound of music, his name rolling off of the male’s tongue beautifully. Daehwi would’ve continued to relish on the moment and space out had Jinyoung not snapped him out of his trance when he asks, “Do you need something from me?”

Daehwi looks at him blankly, unprepared for the next step. He actually just called Jinyoung on impulse, but he didn’t really think of what to actually say. _Why did I even stop him in the first place?_

“Nothing, I was just wondering if you’re going home now?” Daehwi resorts to excusing himself with a smile, not wanting to botch up his suaveness more than what he had already done.

“I…” Jinyoung stays silent for a moment before he continues. “If you don’t need anything then I’m going now.”

 _Great Daehwi, just great!_ “Er, okay.” Daehwi simply says, already aware that his first attempt in executing his plan has already failed. “See you later!” he calls after and Jinyoung simply nods before proceeding to leave the site.

Before leaving though, Daehwi notices someone waving at him – the person Jinyoung went to. Daehwi is confused since he has never seen the male before, but he waves back nonetheless. The two seemed to be in a conversation but it was cut short when Jinyoung suddenly drags the man away. The man waves one last time before eventually leaving the hallway together with Jinyoung.  

_How come that man looked oddly familiar?_

Daehwi chooses to ignore it and goes back to Woojin’s place for the mean time. He was informed by their dorm head that his room is almost ready so he can check it in the afternoon, so he decides to rest while waiting.

On the way to Woojin’s dorm though, the thought of him botching up his chances at a proper conversation with Jinyoung comes up to his mind. _Seriously, that was a good chance! Jinyoung actually gave you some of his precious time but you still chose to waste it!_ Daehwi berates himself, unable to believe how stupid he was for wasting such a golden chance.

Then again, it’s not like there won’t be any more chances. Daehwi and Jinyoung have all of their subjects together so they would be able to see each other for at least five times a week. It’s a sad thought, but it’s even more than how much Daehwi sees his mom, so it should at least be enough time for him to try his plan and woo Jinyoung.

If he wants to see some progress though, he might want to lessen the amount of ogling and daydreaming he’s doing whenever Jinyoung’s around – which is unfortunately, an impossible task for Daehwi.

“Even the way he listens during class is so… so dreamy…” Daehwi sighs pensively for the nth time, a smile plastered on his face as he stares off into space. He and Woojin had just eaten lunch and are killing time before the latter goes to his next class while Daehwi goes to check on his dorm. “He’s just so… so—“

“Daehwi,”

“Yes?”

Daehwi’s face suddenly meets Woojin’s pillow. “What the—“

“Alright, I get it! Your Mr. Adonis is handsome, foxy, cute, and all things good, but!” Woojin shoves his phone onto Daehwi’s face. “My bunny is definitely better!”

Daehwi glares at Woojin, whispering profanities to himself before snatching his cousin’s phone. He sees a picture of a caramel brown headed man, eyes all big and sparkly in tune with the redness of his lips. If Daehwi’s being honest, the man in the picture really _is_ handsome and he has to admit that Woojin does have a decent taste.

But the truth remains the same. _My pick is still better._

“He seems… okay…” Daehwi mumbles, refusing to admit his real thoughts upfront.

“What do you mean ‘okay’? He’s great! He’s the best!” Daehwi rolls his eyes at Woojin, already knowing where the conversation is going. “Park Jihoon is an angel who fell from the sky! He’s—“

Daehwi’s phone suddenly rings, his alarm going off very loudly. _Saved by the bell._

Woojin doesn’t stop his rants and just continues going on about how wonderful and perfect his crush is. And as much as Daehwi would want to indulge him and hear him praise his goddamn muse for the nth time, unfortunately, he has other more important and crucial things to attend to. “Time for me to go check my dorm room. See you, hyung!”

“Hey! Where are you going?! I’m not done yet!”

Daehwi runs out of the dorm and into the streets. His dorm from Woojin’s building isn’t too far; it would only be a few minutes of walk. He didn’t really need to hurry but if he had stayed for another second, Woojin wouldn’t have let him go and would have showed him his secret folder full of his crush’s pictures.

Which reminds Daehwi of the very person who was with Jinyoung earlier that morning.

_Park Jihoon!_

Daehwi walks to the direction of his dorm, all the while trying to come up with a plausible reason as to how in the world Woojin’s crush is together with _his_ crush. _Are they friends perhaps? Are they close?_ Daehwi couldn’t be sure and he doesn’t really have anything against it if it were the case, but it’s just kind of fascinating to him how the world can possibly be so small. It would be too much of a coincidence if that is indeed the case.

“Jinyoung is still better though…” Daehwi is staring on the ground, too absorbed with his thoughts (and fantasies about his Adonis) when he fails to see the person walking in front of him coming to a complete stop, and thus causing for Daehwi to crash onto the man’s back. Fortunately, he wasn’t walking too fast so the impact wasn’t much and only his bag drops onto the ground. _I definitely shouldn’t only look at the ground while walking._

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t looking.” Daehwi says, rubbing his sore nose. He then sees the person crouching down to get his bag, but he beats the latter to it. “It’s okay, thanks—“ however, he doesn’t complete his sentence and stops, eyes widening in surprise when he sees the face of the man who only looked at him with a deadpanned expression.

“Daehwi, are you following me?”


	3. Flowerbomb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \- Jinyoung reiterates that he. does. NOT. blush.  
> \- Daehwi is still concerned whether soy milk and Pocari Sweat is good for humanity or not (let us know your opinions, folks).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> H*ppy birthday 2019!  
> A lot of my mutuals asked my why I'm greeting them happy birthday instead of h*ppy new year and I tell them the same thing.  
> I'd rather celebrate life than celebrate the n*w year uwu
> 
> Still, we are one!  
> No matter what path the members take, especially our babies JinHwi, we will still love and support them!  
> Only love for Wanna One and Wannables!
> 
> XOXO

[Flowerbomb](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IG7J2hrqww)

* * *

 

“Daehwi, are you following me?”

Jinyoung abruptly turns to his back, meets the startled eyes of Daehwi, and immediately regrets the sudden surge of audacity he got when he realized that the boy was walking behind him.

It was a good and bright afternoon.

Jihoon just fed him lunch (bless his soul) and he finally finished his classes for the remainder of the day. He didn’t have much coursework and only needed to do a few. It was definitely a good day, the perfect day to just unwind and rest his mind off of uni related things.

It’s still quite early if he thinks about it and normal people of his age would usually go outside and take opportunity of the free time that has been blest to him. But Jinyoung, bless him and his very dreary soul, isn’t exactly normal so he chooses to immediately go back to his dorm to sleep after dropping Jihoon to his next class.

He’s tired (from all the human interactions he did) and he’s a university student so spare him.

Although on the way back, he hears a familiar voice and footsteps behind him. On normal circumstances, he wouldn’t even give a shit since the street he was walking on is one of the main streets to their university, and almost 30% of their university population walks on the said street. Yet when he unconsciously turns to look at his side, he sees a very familiar raven head through his peripheral vision and it catches him off guard.

_Lee Daehwi?_

Jinyoung doesn’t even know why he stopped, why he suddenly felt so self-aware just because he realized that it was Daehwi walking behind him. And before he can even realize it, he was already facing Daehwi, words that he hadn’t meant to say already dropped like a huge bomb creeping up on his consciousness.

And to make things worse, Daehwi only looks at him in wonder, as if deliberating if he’s drunk or not. “I’m… not?”

“T-then why are you here?” Jinyoung asks bravely, trying to keep up the act so as to keep Daehwi from noticing how hot and red his ears are.

“I’m on my way to that convenience store. I’m not following you.” Daehwi points to somewhere and Jinyoung follows his trail, but the mortification is too much that he doesn’t really pay attention.

And worse comes to worst when Jinyoung sees a smirk playing on the edges of Daehwi’s lips as he says, “Why, did you want me to follow you?”

The heat on the tip of his ears immediately spread all over his skin, and even without seeing, Jinyoung already knows that his face is ablaze.

_Jinyoung, you really are a few fries short of a happy meal._

“N-no! Don’t!” He stutters. “I m-mean—just don’t follow me! Bye!” he storms off, turning to his back all the while slapping his cheeks lightly, trying to ease its numbness.

_Don’t follow me? Seriously? He just said that he’s not following you, for fuck’s sakes!_

The whole way back to his dorm goes by fast as Jinyoung busies himself with his self-monologue of how entitled and conceited he is, as well as stupid and dumb – as usual. Then again, there’s nothing really new there. Perhaps to other people, he is like the epitome of that one mysterious but very handsome Edward Cullen like character who’s very slick and wouldn’t fail his damsel in distress, but in reality, he’s just another real life counterpart of boo boo the fool (or even worse). One who likes to humiliate himself in front of others and has a hobby of blushing when speaking to people.

Or just to Lee Daehwi, to be precise.

Which shouldn’t be since Daehwi is just his classmate. He’s just Lee Daehwi.

_He is not that child._

Jinyoung slaps himself – hard – horrified by the thoughts that are invading his mind. Never let it be said however, that he’ll just stay put and let his mind be corrupted further than it already is for if he really does, then it’s almost the same as him admitting that he really did blush.

Right in front of Daehwi.

And he can’t have that since Bae Jinyoung, once again, does _not_ blush.

“Jesus Christ, Jinyoung, please get a hold of yourself.” Jinyoung tells himself, finally reaching his dorm room in no less than ten minutes (which utterly seemed like twenty with how much he had to talk himself out of his thoughts).

As soon as he submits his passcode, the door gets unlocked and he enters with a satisfied smile, greeted by the silence and solitary of his room.

Jinyoung’s room is akin – if not slightly bigger – to a bachelor’s pad. The bedroom is literally also the living room, and it’s connected to the dining room and kitchen as well. Only the bathroom is in a separate space, but everything else is combined into just a single area, which is just perfect for a university student like him who likes to keep things simple and doesn’t have the time to clean. Don’t get him wrong, he doesn’t hate cleaning, and he always tries to keep everything in order. It’s just, he doesn’t have much things and he barely gets to stay at the place anyway, seeing as at least 60% of his time, he’s in the campus so there really isn’t a need for him to clean that much.

Unlike Jihoon who literally can’t clean for his dear life. He had known the male since high school and is very well aware of the fact that the boy’s dorm is just a trash (or will be if Jinyoung doesn’t help him clean every so often).

Although growing up with a younger brother and sister, Jinyoung can’t help but feel lonely sometimes. All his life, he had been living with his siblings and had to share rooms with them, so now that he’s alone, a small part of him feels like something’s missing and he gravely misses the company.

_Maybe I should’ve just really dormed in with Jihoon._

 

I should’ve just dormed with you  
**15:22**

I miss you ;;  
**15:23**

 

Aigoo  
**15:24**

 our Jinyoungie is being a baby again  
ujujuju ^3^  
**15:24**

 

I feel lonely :<  
**15:25**

 

Scram and take a nap  
**15:26**

 

Why are you telling me to scram…  
**15:26**

 

Jk, if you take a nap, I will too hehe  
Dw, I’ll wake u up later :}  
**15:27**

 

Jinyoung only chuckles before shaking his head. _There’s no turning back._ He is already there, and he wouldn’t dare waste the money his dad paid for his yearly rent just because he feels a bit melancholic. Besides, when will he ever get another chance to have a peaceful life like this?

It was then that he hears a loud thump on the wall between his room and the one beside his. Jinyoung’s room is second to the last in the whole floor, so he always had to pass by all the rooms before he can reach his. Well, except the last one beside his, but then that one has always been inhabited. He knows since just when he’s in the process of moving in his stuff to his current dorm unit, he had encountered the previous tenant who was, coincidentally, moving out his stuff. He didn’t exactly know the person per se, but he knows that the man had already graduated hence, he’s vacating the dorms. Ever since then, the room had always been empty. Not until recently when a few people started bringing in some boxes inside. He didn’t really pay no heed to it since it was a one time thing.

Which is why it’s kind of intriguing how all of a sudden, he hears a sound coming from the room. Then again, it would be farfetched for it to continue being empty, being that the new academic year had already started a month ago.

If any, he’s intrigued why the tenant is only moving now. But Jinyoung is tired and he’s not about to concern himself with more theories about the sudden emergence of a tenant in the room beside his.

With much haste, Jinyoung immediately drops his bag onto the floor and plops himself on his bed, not bothering to change clothes at all as sleep immediately takes over him, fading the crumpled thoughts in his mind to black.

-

Jinyoung likes peace. He doesn’t really give much care to his surroundings.

Although that being the case, it doesn’t necessarily mean that he shouldn’t be aware of things – as little as it might be.

And this he tells himself over and over as he stops in his tracks, eyes and ears zooming in as he spots a familiar raven head walking alongside their two other classmates in one class – two seniors that go by the names of Daniel and Jaehwan (who, apparently, are repeating literature for the third time already – before stopping and taking a rest on a nearby bench.

Jinyoung doesn’t even wonder anymore, why Daehwi, a freshman, is hanging out with seniors. For all he knows, Daehwi could be hanging out with faculty staffs too (he isn’t Mr. Congeniality to Jinyoung for nothing), but he digresses, and just continues walking – slower however – until his classmates’ are within his hearing range.

“Are you still not done moving in?” Jaehwan asks Daehwi, who in turn, scowls. “Aren’t you only a freshman? Shouldn’t you be like… taking it easy?”

“What about you two? Aren’t you both seniors?” Daehwi retorts, looking back and forth between Daniel and Jaehwan. “Shouldn’t you be like… I don’t know… _not_ taking it easy?”

Jaehwan gasps. “Damn son, who hurt you?”

“He has a point though, Jaehwan.” Daniel snickers.

“I’m just so damn tired, _please_ hyungs. Kill me.” Daehwi starts. “I really should’ve just stayed with my cousin. I’m so dumb.”

One of the two other friends, Daniel, turns to him and asks, “What’s the big deal anyway? Why does it seem like you have so much stuff? And why are you only moving in now when it’s been a whole month since school started?

“Did you even see his things?” Jaehwan snorts. “He collects a bunch of trash so no wonder he’s having a hard time organizing his room.”

“Hey, those are not trash!” Daehwi retorts. He glares at his friend for a moment before saying, “But please, don’t remind me of it. It’s a nightmare.”

Daehwi sighs in exasperation, looking very much like he had been sleepless for days. His dark circles are apparent as well, and his skin has been looking a tad paler.

Don’t even ask Jinyoung why and how he knows of this, since he himself doesn’t know the answers either.

Jinyoung then suddenly remembers the bottle of _Pocari_ _Sweat_ in his bag (he brought it from his dorm) and contemplates about giving it to Daehwi. He thinks that the boy definitely needs it more than him, but the fear of being asked with unnecessary questions is eating his good intention away. Especially because of the seniors’ dubious presence and knowing them, Jinyoung is sure that he’ll only reach his quota of allowed daily human interaction if he goes along with his plan. 

On the other hand, Daehwi and Jinyoung are classmates. It may not be apparent but Jinyoung is a kind and thoughtful individual who cares for the wellbeing of his classmates (he definitely is _not_ ) so surely, it would only be normal for him to give Daehwi a drink, right?

He’s just giving him a drink anyway. He can treat it as his peace offering too, since Jinyoung did act rude towards Daehwi the day before.

_Yes, you’re just being the kind and nice classmate that you are, Jinyoung. Right._

But before he can even decide properly, he sees Daniel picking up a can of _Pocari_ _Sweat_ from a nearby vendo machine. The male takes a swig from it before passing it to Daehwi, who gives him his gratitude before drinking as well.

Jinyoung unconsciously clenches the bottle tightly inside his bag.

“Jinyoung?”

Jinyoung turns on instinct upon hearing his name, only to have an internal panic attack when he sees Daniel looking very much surprised, Jaehwan with a smirk, and Daehwi with a blank look on his face.

“Er—uh… yes?” Jinyoung stumbles on his words, his right hand quickly pushing down the bottle further inside his bag and away from the scrutinizing eyes of many, especially Daehwi’s senior friends.

“Have you been there for long? We didn’t see you!” Daehwi suddenly chirps, eyes a lot brighter as he stands up. “What are you doing here though? Aren’t classes already done?”

“I… well—I’m thirsty! Yeah, that.” Jinyoung mentally thanks himself for not removing the stuff in his jeans as he pulls out a single coin from it, slipping it onto the slot hole of the vendo machine after. He receives a can of _Pocari_ _Sweat_ after a few seconds before he has an epiphany. “I’m just—wait, how did you know my classes are done? I have a separate elective today but it was cancelled…”

“Oh, I know your schedule.”

Jinyoung sucks in a breath. “H-how—“

Daehwi winks. “I have my ways.”

And Daniel almost chokes whereas Jaehwan only snorts.

Jinyoung, to the best of his ability, tries to keep himself calm and composed, but the impending warmth he feels on his ears is nothing but a signal for him to go because he knows that sooner or later, he’ll lose the feelings on his cheeks as well as his ability to properly construct coherent sentences.

Something that apparently happens quite often when he is forced to interact with Daehwi.

“I need to go… uh—see you!”

Jinyoung speed walks out of the scene all the while fanning his face which he’s sure is as red as a tomato. He wasn’t even able to get the drink he bought from the vendo machine, but it’s the least of his concerns as of the moment.

The fact that Daehwi has his schedule memorized had him short circuit so much that he just had to leave. But the fact that just that idea alone makes him short circuit is a much more disconcerting thought, surprising him to an extent that he couldn’t focus even as he arrives home later and tries to revise his coursework as a mean to divert his attention.

_What’s his deal, really? Why the hell did he get my schedule? Should I be concerned about this?_

_No, no, Jinyoung. This is nothing. You need to stop overthinking. Daehwi’s just being nice…_

_But then should I share this to Jihoon—_

The wall separating Jinyoung’s room and that of the room next to his lets out several loud knocks as if it heard his internal woes, successfully shutting him up.

Jinyoung contemplates on knocking back, a tad offended, but ultimately decides against it. It’s not like he can complain about the sudden arrival of a new tenant, as well as the noise they brought into their place anyway. It was beyond his control, whatever is going on behind the four walls of his room, so he just plugs in his earphones and plays his music on full blast, hoping that it will be enough to drown him and his deranged thoughts.  

 

* * *

 

“Do you need help?”

“Yes, _please!_ ”

“Okay.”

“Wow, you’ll actually help me?”

“Uh, no? I was just asking if you need help but I didn’t say that I was actually going to help you—hey!”

Daehwi rolls his eyes, gathers all of the patience that he had acquired with the years of dealing with his insufferable cousin, Woojin, and tries not to strangle Jaehwan since he is still his senior after all. Fortunately, Daniel, being the angel that he is, isn’t oblivious to Daehwi’s internal struggle and slaps Jaehwan’s mouth with a cracker he was eating.

“There, better?” Daniel asks, giving a piece to Daehwi as well before the boy nods thankfully.

“Really, what would I do without you, hyung?”

For any average freshman, it isn’t a natural occurrence to be good friends with seniors.

First off, the age gap is quite a bit. Second, seniority is a big deal in South Korea hence, freshmen tends to avoid getting too close to seniors. Third, there isn’t much chance for them to bond or hang out since classes are entirely different. There are org and department parties led by seniors, but those don’t happen quite often, and you can only count within your fingers the number of occurrence of freshmen who actually dared to interact with seniors. Juniors and sophomores are understandable, since the two levels are widespread, whereas freshmen is not.

But then Daehwi is an exception. Well, not really. In fact, even he found it weird that while he has quite a lot of friends in the freshmen year, the only people who he really considers as his closest friends are Kang Daniel and Kim Jaehwan.

Kang Daniel and Kim Jaehwan are two quite popular seniors from the performing arts department, called as the god twins. Twins being that one is never seen without the other and god because, only gods are capable of crafting such fine arts that are Daniel’s dancing and Jaehwan’s singing.

Daniel is a campus crush. He possesses an innocent face in contrast with his not so innocent body that exudes incomparable grace and flexibility every time he dances. Jaehwan is very much sought out as well, having an image so soft that everybody swoons to him. Not to mention the chubbiness of his cheeks and a voice that can be considered as music itself, one can only take so much before they succumb to his charms.

And while Daniel has a bad boy image whereas Jaehwan has a soft one, it’s actually the opposite. Daniel is soft and caring while Jaehwan is the wild and aggressive one.

But if Daehwi’s being honest, they are just both plain weird.

This Daehwi finds out the first time that he actually spoke to them – in one of their shared classes. Coincidentally that day, Daehwi was half an hour late for class (no thanks to his good for nothing cousin) and got the only empty seat which is right beside Daniel. Most of the freshmen tend to avoid sitting beside the two, intimidated by their presence, and Daehwi, despite being a social butterfly, felt the same too. However, he had no other choice back then. If he wanted to get a good amount of lecture and pass that subject, he’d have to swallow his trepidation and take the seat.

Which is exactly what Daehwi did – sit beside Daniel and Jaehwan. Although as soon as he took the empty spot, he was greeted with a question of which he didn’t know would be the bridge to a newfound unconventional friendship:

_“Hey, so I know this is random but… do you think soy milk is good for humans?”_

Apparently, according to Jaehwan, he and Daniel had been debating about the credibility of soy milk as a main constituent for achieving a golden voice for the whole entire day already – with Jaehwan in favor of soy milk – and realized that it was high time to get a third opinion to rule out the discussion once and for all. Daehwi, despite not having tried soy milk before, just chose no, and probably had the greatest regret (not really) of his twenty years of living for getting lured into their whims (Daehwi just thanks Guanlin – another classmate of his – for letting him copy his notes).

If the professor saw them having a very heated and profound discussion between the pros and cons of drinking soy milk, he didn’t say anything of it, probably fed up with the way Daniel and Jaehwan work, having handled them thrice already.

And despite knowing how talented the two are in their own respective fields, Daehwi doesn’t even wonder why anymore, as seniors, they are still taking a freshmen subject.

Much like how he had stopped questioning the bizarre but significant friendship he has with the two.

“Can we take a sit first, I’m tired.” Daehwi says as he spots a bench right beside a vendo machine in the middle of the hallway.

They just finished a class and being the kind and warm hearted friend that he is, Daehwi finally took pity towards Daniel and Jaehwan’s unending misery in their subject and agreed to study with them. And by study with them, it’s just to keep their concentration in check. Knowing both Daniel and Jaehwan, it wouldn’t even be five minutes yet and their focus would already be on a random cat walking outside or the blueness of the sky, or just about anything completely trivial and unrelated to their subject.

But the library Daniel chose is at the other side of the campus. Whatever reason he has, Daehwi doesn’t know and won’t bother to ask anymore since just like Jaehwan, Daniel can be very eccentric (or even more).

They rest for a while, exchanging their usual everyday banter. Daniel gets a can from the vendo and drinks from it before passing it to Daehwi. Despite only knowing each other for a while, they had always been quite comfortable with each other so there isn’t any problem with sharing their stuff.

“Thanks,” Daehwi mutters before accepting the can from Daniel, but just as it touches his lips, he stops when he hears the latter calling a very familiar name.

“Jinyoung?”

Daehwi whips his head to the side and his sight immediately brightens, pink swallowing his surroundings as he sees the person he had been looking for the entire day – or his entire life for that matter.

“Er—uh… yes?” Jinyoung stops on his tracks, giving out a small smile as he looks at the three.

Without any question, Daehwi immediately stands up, shoves the forgotten can of _Pocari_ _Sweat_ to Jaehwan, and trudges over to Jinyoung with a million watt smile on his face.

Daehwi had always been cute and adorable no matter what he does. And while he may had never been boastful about it despite being self-aware, he’s also not afraid to use it to his favor.

Especially if it means that he’ll be able to make progress with the apple of his eye.

“Have you been there for long? We didn’t see you!” Daehwi runs a hand through his hair.  “What are you doing here? Aren’t classes already done?” And bats his eyelids (subtly but not really).

A deadly combo.

But contrary to his expectations, Jinyoung only blinks at him and says, “I… well—I’m thirsty! Yeah, that.” The male walks past him and onto the vendo machine, pulling out a coin from his pocket to buy a drink and leaving Daehwi dumbfounded.  

_What._

And it doesn’t help that Jaehwan had witnessed the whole exchange, giving him the cue to snort and mock Daehwi’s humiliated amour-propre. At least Daniel had the decency to act as if he was fiddling on his phone – even though the male could never ever act for his own dear life.

“I’m just—wait, how did you know my classes are done? I have a separate elective today but it was cancelled…”

But then Jinyoung stills and gives him an opening, eyes all big and questioning against Daehwi’s bright ones.

Daehwi, bless his tenacious soul, dives back in.

“Oh, I know your schedule.”

Jinyoung freezes. “H-how—“

And Daehwi goes in for the kill with his signature wink.

“I have my ways.”

Daniel begins coughing as Jaehwan hands him their shared drink before hiding behind his friend’s back, Daehwi’s brazen display of confidence becoming too much for him to take.

And apparently, it’s the same for Jinyoung too since not even two seconds later does Daehwi notice the budding redness of his ears, very similar to their first meeting.

Daehwi has his eyes morphing into hearts at the sight.

Jinyoung breathes deeply and turns to Daniel and Jaehwan, simply giving them a nod. “I need to go… uh—see you!” he tells Daehwi after and walks off in no time, forgetting to pick up his drink in the process.

Being his meddlesome self, Jaehwan picks up the free drink in delight, but before he can even open it, it gets intercepted by Daehwi, who snatches it from his clutches. Jaehwan only clicks his tongue. He then checks if the hallway is clear before turning to Daniel, “But did you see the look on the kid’s face when you gave Daehwi your drink?” Jaehwan snickers. “The boy looked like he was constipated or something.”

“What the hell did I do now?” Daniel asks Jaehwan who only shrugs in response. “Isn’t Jinyoung with—“ Daniel just stops and sighs. “You know what, stop brewing up issue and just go.”

Daehwi shakes his head as he watches the apple of his eye slowly disappear far off in the distance, in disbelief that Jaehwan actually dissed Jinyoung right in front of his face.

Then again, it doesn’t really matter to him anyway since his eyes are just perpetually set up to have an ‘Adonis Bae Jinyoung’ filter that allows Daehwi to see the male’s beauty at any given moment, location, and environment. The boy could even be having diarrhea (cross fingers) and Daehwi would think that he’s still fetching. That’s just how effective his eyes’ filter is.

Or maybe he is just _that_ whipped.

But if there’s any good thing that came out from Jaehwan’s mouth, is that it made Daehwi notice something.

“So Jaehwan-hyung,” he starts. “Do you think Jinyoung’s jealous?”

But when he turns to his friends, they are nowhere in sight and are already far off at the other end of the hallway.

“You traitors!”

-

“Woojin-hyung, tell me again why I decided to dorm by myself instead of just sharing with you.”

“Because you were being so finicky? And picky? And I don’t know… just being difficult in general?”

Daehwi clicks his tongue but doesn’t disagree. He sighs for the nth time, putting down a box in the middle of the living room of his newly acquired dorm unit.

After a month into the first semester, Daehwi finally gets to move into his dorm. The room isn’t big, nor is it too small, but it still took a while for the staff to rearrange it and replace the furniture which were apparently broken by the previous tenant. The bedroom, kitchen, and living room are all conjoined together and the bathroom is the only one in a separate room – very fitting for a college student.

Being a single child, Daehwi have always had a room all to himself and while his room in their house is comparably bigger to his new dwelling, he isn’t complaining nonetheless. The only problem is that he isn’t exactly the best organizer there is, and the fact that he likes to collect a lot of (useless) things isn’t helping his situation either.

Sure, he doesn’t need to worry about the appliances since they are already set up, but he had never tried setting up bed frames before, as well as couches and tables. In addition, his clutter of a mess is incomparable, ranging from random frames, wall decors, dolls, and just about any stuff that is completely irrelevant to his university life, and it even makes the room smaller than it already is. In his room at their house, he doesn’t feel nor realize it that much, but bringing everything into a smaller space makes him think otherwise.

And just looking at the pile of boxes and scrapped furniture pieces that are currently stacked in his room, Daehwi’s beginning to doubt if he can ever finish setting up his room within the semester.

“Can you please not start on me with the bullshit again?” Daehwi says, plopping down on his bed. “I’m so damn exhausted. I’ve been trying to organize everything but there’s just so many stuff…”

Daehwi looks at the poorly done work on his wall – a tilted photo frame of him and his mom. He had actually started putting up some of his stuff, but it isn’t looking all too well, especially since his mom had always helped him.

_Damn, I just miss my mom more._

“I would help you if I didn’t have anything to do tonight.” Woojin tells him.

“Can’t you just cancel then?”

“No can do, kid. It’s a… study group, and I was the one who organized it. I can’t back out now.” Daehwi snorts, disbelieving his cousin’s words. Woojin looks at his watch and taps Daehwi’s shoulder. “And I’m actually running late already, so you’re on your own kid. Gotta run.”

For all Daehwi knows, Woojin’s crush, Jihoon, is there that’s why his cousin’s in a hurry, but he doesn’t make any more fuss. If he is in a study group with Jinyoung, even he would waste no time.

Daehwi frowns and just shoos Woojin. “Just go.” Woojin just smiles at him before proceeding to exit the room.

Daehwi sighs, unwilling to move from the comfort of his bed, but then he can’t really keep the mess any longer. He can even barely walk properly across the room.

So he decides to continue cleaning up his stuff, but then he hears a shout saying ‘delivery’ just as he is reminded by his growling stomach that he hasn’t eaten dinner yet.

“But first things first, I should eat.”

Daehwi receives a bowl of Jajjangmyeon from the delivery man and starts eating immediately despite him eating the said noodles repeatedly for the past couple of days that he had started moving in. His hunger still comes first before his delicate taste buds anyway.

And it doesn’t take long for him to finish eating, mainly because he was tired and exhausted, and the quick dinner – no matter how unappealing and dissatisfactory it was – still helps with his declining energy.

So Daehwi tries to start on another wall décor, this time, a family portrait. He looks at the wall and gauges for the perfect alignment before deeming it ready for a try.

He gets a nail and starts hammering, without so much as a hesitation. _Wow, this isn’t so bad—_

But several unexpected knocks on the door staggers his concentration, and he ends up hammering his finger. “Shit—ow!” he yelps, making sure to put the hammer down on the floor before carefully looking at his bruised finger, which he assumes will probably look ugly and gross for the next couple of days.

Not a good sign for his hair running or tucking moves for Mr. Adonis.

_How am I supposed to flirt now?!_

The unexpected guest is unrelenting either, continuously knocking on his damn door and not caring about the fact that Daehwi had just injured himself.

And Daehwi, being a dauntless, won’t hesitate to give them a piece of his mind.

“Who the hell—“ although as soon as he opens the door, Daehwi’s face turns aghast, suddenly coming in face to face with main subject of his concern for his dead nail.

“Jinyoung?!”


	4. Hide & Seek

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We welcome _Plan Rooster_.  
> \- Jinyoung, despite looking quite shabby at times, believes himself to be a cultured and capable man (debatable but, okay).  
> \- Daehwi, despite being a self-proclaimed audacious gay who is loaded with a gun full of tactics and moves, is still very much frail and delicate (very true).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Longest chapter so far uwu  
> I had to remove a part and squeeze it in another chapter (4/5 I think i forgot) since it's so long already.
> 
> Anyway, I'm currently still working on chapter 7 and have been delayed for the past few days since life happens so next update will be tentative.  
> I'm going to try to upload the next chapter next week but ofc, no promises.
> 
> XOXO

 

[Hide and Seek](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aIl8wqIiyu8)

 

* * *

 

“Jinyoung?!”

Mirroring the same shocked and surprised expression of Daehwi, Jinyoung freezes on the spot as he tries to gather and collect his disarrayed thoughts.

_Is Daehwi following me?_

“Are you f—“ he stops, biting the insides of his cheeks as he mentally berates himself.

_Jinyoung, are you really going to make a fool out of yourself again?_

No one can blame him for his suspicions though. In a span of a week, he had been seeing Daehwi a lot more than he had imagined – probably even more than he had been seeing Jihoon. And every single time they meet, he and Daehwi would be caught up in an inevitable conversation, with the latter somehow always unconsciously making a way to make Jinyoung feel as if he was actually being followed.

Granted, Daehwi denied it, but then how can he explain the fact that he knows Jinyoung’s schedule?

Then again, there’s always the possibility that Daehwi could just be messing with him. There’s no way for him to acquire Jinyoung’s schedule without asking for it from the school registrar, and it’s not like they would give it without his consent. And aside from Jinyoung himself, Jihoon is the only one who knows his schedule and that one is out of the question as well.

“Daehwi,” he calls the lad instead. “What are you doing here?”

Still uncomprehending the situation himself, Daehwi answers, “I live here. I just moved in this week.”

Jinyoung almost chokes, his face pale upon hearing Daehwi’s declaration. To think that he thought Daehwi was following him all this time, when it turns out that he’s actually just residing in the same dorm complex and is Jinyoung’s new neighbor.

Jinyoung just wants to dig a hole and bury himself, deeply embarrassed with his nonfunctional logic and reasoning.

Albeit, it’s not every day that you’ll get to be neighbors with your classmate, most especially Lee Daehwi. The social butterfly who’s friends with everybody; the same individual who actually used a pick up line on Jinyoung the first moment they met.

And the more that Jinyoung thinks about it, the more that it seems too much for it to just be a happenstance.

_But there’s also the fact that life can always be so arbitrary at times._

“Uh… but what are you doing here?” Daehwi interrupts Jinyoung’s internal conflict, the look of confusion still very much apparent on his face.

Jinyoung sighs inwardly, definitely not absorbing the unbelievable situation given to him all too well, but chooses to just yield to reality’s randomness and pay no heed to it. “Uh… well, I actually live right next to you.” Jinyoung isn’t sure, but Daehwi’s eyes flicker momentarily before retaining his calm countenance.

“Oh wow, we’re neighbors!” Daehwi chirps.

Despite the distraction, Jinyoung suddenly remembers the main purpose of his visit. “But I… the reason I’m here is because I actually wanted to ask if everything’s okay?” Daehwi raises an eyebrow at him. “I mean, I know you just move in and all, but I just wanted to make sure since I’ve been hearing loud knocks the past few days…” Jinyoung trails off once his eyes move past behind Daehwi,

Wood pieces of which he assumes to be parts of a sofa as well as table are settled on the side, while a number of boxes ranging in different sizes are stacked in the middle where a bowl of emptied Jajjangmyeon is situated at the very top (Jinyoung doesn’t even know how or why Daehwi placed it at such an uncanny place).

Likewise, it doesn’t take a lot for Jinyoung to surmise that Daehwi, who just moved in recently, must either be an only child or the maknae.

“Did I disturb you? I’m so sorry!” Daehwi’s eyebrows furrow, looking at Jinyoung in alarm. “I’ve been trying to set everything up but it’s just not going the way I want it to...” he trails off. “I’ve never really done this before since it’s always been only me and my mom so it’s taking me a while to sort things out.” he scratches his neck and gives out a sheepish smile.

And confirming his assumptions, Jinyoung suddenly feels a part of himself becoming all too weak, the urge to pet the boy’s head suddenly stirring within him.

He ascribes it to the fact that he is the oldest child in their family, and that Daehwi looking all helpless and dependent reminds him of his younger siblings – the beady eyes, the sheepish smile, and just his overall air.

Yet a small part of him – somewhere within the unknown – tells him that it’s more than just that. Whatever it is exactly, he isn’t sure and he’s not about to confuse himself with it more.

Jinyoung notices the bruise on Daehwi’s finger, his eyes lingering to it a tad longer than he wanted before looking back at the latter in the eyes and asks, “Do you… do you want to go with me back to my room?”

Daehwi suddenly huffs deeply, eyes blinking repeatedly as if checking to see if Jinyoung’s joking or not. “I-I made dinner more than I should… but I mean if you don’t want to—“

“Yes! Definitely!” Daehwi exclaims, grabbing Jinyoung’s hand in the process. Jinyoung gulps, eyes flickering between their hands and Daehwi’s jovial countenance. “I-I mean, sure. Yeah, I won’t say no to free food.” Daehwi chuckles as he abruptly lets go of Jinyoung’s hand.

Jinyoung watches as Daehwi turns off the lights to his room before closing the door. Once they’re out, Jinyoung punches in his key code and the door opens. “My room is just the same as yours so feel free to make yourself at home.” He closes the door once Daehwi’s inside and quickly rushes to the kitchen to heat up the kimchi Jiggae he made earlier.

Once he put the stove into the lowest heat, Jinyoung rests his palms on the counter and sighs. He isn’t supposed to be doing this; he isn’t supposed to be inviting his classmate, let alone Daehwi into his room. It’s true that he’d much rather not associate himself with others, but before he can even realize what he was doing, he had already dropped the question, inviting Daehwi into the peace of his room.

And Jinyoung can’t help but feel uneasy – restless even – to see Daehwi seated in the middle of his room, eyes roaming around his private sanctuary, his own personal nest.

But he chooses to disregard it. It was probably only because it was a first for him for another person aside from Jihoon to enter his room.

And besides, for some reason, he doesn’t hate it. While he feels restless seeing Daehwi, he doesn’t hate it.

Not even one bit.

Jinyoung sees Daehwi looking back at him, face morphed into a bright smile. He turns back immediately and pulls out a first aid kit from the cabinet kitchen before trudging over to where Daehwi sat on the floor. If he’s going to waste time over his conflicting thoughts, then might as well do the very reason why he invited Daehwi to his room in the first place. “Daehwi, give me your hand.”

“If you’re worried about the bruise on my finger, it’s fine.” Daehwi says but gives his hand to Jinyoung nonetheless.

“I’m not worried, I just…” _what Jinyoung? What?_ “I just don’t want it to get infected, you know. It’s dangerous… yeah.”

Jinyoung averts his eyes from Daehwi’s and focuses on treating the latter’s finger. He cleanses it first with a disinfectant – eventually sneaking glances towards Daehwi to see if it hurts – and applies a topical antibiotic after. While looking for a gauze bandage in his kit, Daehwi suddenly breaks the silence.

“You’re pretty good at this.” Daehwi compliments him and Jinyoung would’ve been flattered had it stopped there. But no, it doesn’t. “You’re so gentle… you must’ve held a lot of hands before, huh?”

Jinyoung coughs in surprise and Daehwi would’ve patted his back had the former not stopped him. “I—no, it’s just… I’ve done this to my younger siblings before so I guess I have a little bit of experience dealing with these kinds of stuff.” Jinyoung explains, finally seeing the gauze pad and cutting a piece to use.

“Are you the oldest in your family?”

Jinyoung nods. “And you’re an only child, right?”

“How did you—“ Daehwi suddenly nods upon remembering their earlier encounter. “Oh yeah, I did tell you about that.” He then asks, “When is your birthday anyway?”

Jinyoung doesn’t answer immediately, not expecting to be asked with such a question. Once he’s done wrapping Daehwi’s finger with the gauze pad however, he mutters, “May 10, 2000.”

“Oh! I’m from ’01!” Daehwi chirps. “I was born on January 29 but you’re still almost a year ahead so…” Jinyoung raises an eyebrow at him. “Should I call you Jinyoung-hyung instead?”

Jinyoung feels it again, the soft and fluffy sensation which he couldn’t comprehend, the fond and warm emotion which he liked, and he finds himself smiling involuntarily.

“Sure,” Jinyoung simply says. “Call me whatever you want.”

“Okay then, Jinyoung-hyung.” Daehwi mutters an ‘ooh’ in astonishment after, observing his bandaged finger before grinning at Jinyoung. “Thank you for this!”

After cleaning up the first aid kit, Jinyoung immediately prepares the utensils on his mini floor table for their dinner – which is just an average Kimchi Jiggae (he just whipped up whatever was in his fridge and apparently, there wasn’t a lot). Daehwi actually offered to help him set up the table, embarrassed to just be sitting idly while Jinyoung’s moving around, but the latter isn’t about to let his first guest (other than Jihoon) do chores, since he is – as he so proudly believes – _a fine young man with a good upbringing._

And being that he is indeed a fine young man with good manners, Jinyoung gives Daehwi an ample portion first before getting his. A mixture of both nervousness and worry eats his mind as he watches Daehwi try a spoonful of his cooking. He hasn’t let anybody try his cooking before, aside from his family. Jinyoung had cooked for his siblings before and while they enjoyed it to an extent, he still couldn’t be quite confident yet since they are his siblings after all – no matter what, they will surely be biased.

Jihoon have tried his cooking before actually, but then the man is akin to a pig, as much as he had always refused to admit it (and Jinyoung quotes, “ _I am not a pig baby!”),_ and does not reject any form of edible food possible so his opinion and review aren’t really that credible.

Thus when Daehwi’s eyes lit up in what Jinyoung assumes to be delight, he breathes a sigh of relief.

“This is good!” Daehwi praises him. “You should cook more for me, hah.”

Jinyoung shrugs, averting Daehwi’s gaze before muttering, “Sure, if you want.” He then proceeds to start eating as well, trying to come off as calm as possible despite feeling an immense sense of pride in his mediocre cooking skills.

A hint of surprise flashes briefly in Daehwi’s eyes before he giggles. “That would be nice.”

They eat in silence. Well mainly Jinyoung, who only listened as Daehwi rant on about how their college life is turning out better than he had expected, with the exception of having to unluckily(?) befriend the two notorious seniors – Daniel and Jaehwan – and most especially, the whole moving in to the dorm process.

Jinyoung only listens, occasionally nodding and slipping out a few _really?_ and _ohs_ as he lets Daehwi continue on with his stories. It’s not that he’s not interested. In fact, he actually finds himself wanting to squeak in some questions and whatnot, but Daehwi would always be one step ahead of him and explain some parts that he was curious of.

And contrary to his first impression of Daehwi, of the boy being exactly like the person he would want to avoid as he is still indeed a social butterfly, Jinyoung actually feels a lot more at ease and comfortable talking to him than to others.

Unlike others, Daehwi actually seems sincere. The way he sounds so excited with all of his stories, the way he looks so impressed by every small thing, and the way he would wait patiently and listen attentively as Jinyoung speaks, Jinyoung actually feels himself wanting to hear more, to _talk_ more.

And it’s definitely saying something since he’s Jinyoung for goodness’ sakes – he hates socialization.

But again, maybe Daehwi’s an exception since as much as Jinyoung would want to deny it, it’s as if they’ve always done this that talking to him feels like it’s the most natural thing in the world.

_Just like when it was with him._

But Jinyoung knows better than to confuse himself with the past and the present, with reality and fantasy, so he dismisses the idea and moves on. The last thing he would want is to disrupt this newfound keenness he feels – the willingness to actually associate himself to another person aside from Jihoon.

Thus, before he can even realize it himself, all the initial prejudice he has had already disappeared, gone together with all the uncertainties that he had with associating himself with Daehwi.

And Jinyoung decides that if it’s Daehwi, then it’s okay.

He will be okay.

_Jihoon would be so proud of me._

“Hyung, let me help—“ Jinyoung quickly intercepts Daehwi’s attempts of helping him by quickly gathering the bowls and utensils they used in one swift motion, the years of having taken care of his younger siblings preemptively becoming an aid to him. When Daehwi deems his actions futile, he sits back down and huffs, a small smile creeping up on his lips.

Jinyoung doesn’t speak; he only chuckles at Daehwi’s figure before quickly washing the dishes. There weren’t a lot so it only took him a few minutes to be done. Once he’s finished, he sees Daehwi on his feet, already by the doorstep.

“Well, that was a very fulfilling dinner.” Daehwi gives Jinyoung a thumbs up. “Thank you so much, Mr. Bae Jinyoung, for allowing me to have a taste of your amazing cooking.”

Despite the randomness, Jinyoung allows himself to chuckle. “You’re most welcome, Mr. Lee. Anytime.”

“Okay then, back to work for me.” Daehwi opens the door and exits. “See you—huh,” he stops, eyebrows scrunching as he sees Jinyoung following after him. “Where are you going?”

“To your room.” Jinyoung simply answers. “You can’t work on your room by yourself with a bruised finger.”

Daehwi doesn’t make any effort to hide the surprise in his face as he asks, “Are you saying you’re going to help me?”

Jinyoung stalls for a moment, unsure of his words himself. But seeing Daehwi’s perplexed face gives him no time for doubts, and he finds himself saying, “Yeah well… I don’t see any reason why I shouldn’t help a friend.”

Daehwi’s face turns blank and Jinyoung suddenly gets the urge to smack himself and jump off a building.

“I-I mean if you don’t want to—“

“Oh no, no! I mean yes, not that I do _not_ want to—“ Daehwi laughs and slaps Jinyoung’s shoulder lightly. “Haha, you get what I’m trying to say, right?” Jinyoung, on the other hand, only bites his lips and shakes his head. “I mean… I thought you didn’t like me, to be honest.”

Jinyoung’s eyes widen in response. “What made you say that?” he asks. “I could never—“ although before he can continue speaking, he suddenly feels his phone vibrating in his pocket. Fishing it out, he sees the caller and immediately shows his palm to Daehwi to excuse himself.

Daehwi nods keenly with a small smile. Jinyoung mouths him a ‘thank you’ before turning around to answer the call.

_“Jinyoungie, I’m done with my classes!”_

“Uh… can you hold on for a moment? This will be very quick.”

_“Why? It’s been a long day! I just want to talk to my Jinyoungie!”_

Jinyoung almost snorts but immediately bites his tongue to keep himself from doing so. “I’m with a friend right now so—“

“I want to be more than _friends_ though…”

Jinyoung quickly turns back to Daehwi and meets his big, bright eyes. The boy tilts his head to the side in question and Jinyoung only stares at him, as if waiting for something he isn’t even sure of.

_“Jinyoung? You still there?”_

Jinyoung snaps out of his trance when he hears the voice at the other end of the line, and he clears his throat. “Sorry, but I’ll have to go. I promise I’ll call you later.” He ignores the whines he hears and quickly ends the call before returning to Daehwi.

“Sorry about that,” Jinyoung pockets his phone and asks, “But did you perhaps say something?”

A couple of seconds pass before Daehwi shakes his head. “It’s nothing!” he then smiles. “But are you still up for your offer?”

Jinyoung raises an eyebrow in question.

“You know, about helping me and being my friend.”

Jinyoung looks at Daehwi, as if gauging if he’s serious or not, before giving out a soft laughter. “Of course.”

“For which one though?”

“For both.”

“For both—Oh.” Jinyoung sees Daehwi’s eyes flicker for a moment, before the boy breathes heavily and smiles. “Okay. Sure.” Daehwi nods a couple times, smile perfectly intact. “Yeah, _bros_. We’re bros. Yup, bro.”

Jinyoung erupts into laughter, unable to contain the amusement he feels. He can’t exactly pinpoint which part; all he knows is he’s feeling lax and very much entertained.

And it’s all because of Daehwi.

“Okay, _bro,_ just rest for now.” Jinyoung tells Daehwi, oblivious to the puzzlement of the lad. “We’ll fix your room tomorrow, yeah?”

Despite being so obviously lost, Daehwi still nods, a puzzled look instilled on his face. “Okay…?” Daehwi mutters, which only sounds more like a question as he walks backwards to his room.

Jinyoung waves at him with a small smile and Daehwi does the same.

“Good night, Jinyoungie-hyung!”

_Jinyoungie-hyung!_

Jinyoung stills, staggered by the momentary voice he heard in his head. Daehwi looks at him worriedly, noticing the change in his countenance, but was quickly assured when Jinyoung shakes his head and gestures for the former to go on. Daehwi smiles and waves one last time before eventually entering his room.

“Good night, Daehwi.”

 

-

 

Jinyoung, despite looking quite shabby at times, believes himself to be a cultured and capable man. This he proves (finally) when it only took a day for him and Daehwi to finish setting up the latter’s room – something which Daehwi has been trying to do for a whole week. Then again, he’s also taking into account the fact that there are 2 pairs of hands working this time (only 1 and a half, if he’s being honest, since Daehwi’s finger is injured).

And actually, it wasn’t that hard either. He just needed to screw and connect most of the furniture pieces whilst Daehwi supports him at the side by handing him the tools he needed. Being the eldest son, he had quite a few – if not a lot – of experience being a handyman. It was just like helping his brother set up his _legos_ , or set up his sister’s doll house, or set up a new table (which they didn’t really need) bought by his mom (since his mom does have splurging tendencies that not even his dad could stop).

As for the rest of the small boxes – which Jinyoung assumes to be the smaller stuff – Jinyoung actually wanted to help Daehwi with cleaning them up, but the latter told him that it’s fine and that he’d be embarrassed if Jinyoung sees his clutter of a mess.

Jinyoung doesn’t insist anymore, not only because he didn’t want to push Daehwi but also since the latter’s excuse sounds fairly reasonable.

“That should do it, right?” Jinyoung asks, looking around the fully furnished room. “You should rest and I should go back—“

He gets cut off when Daehwi pushes him back down on the floor where he initially sat.

“I know it’s already dinnertime but let me at least make a snack for you or something.” Daehwi says as he moves to the kitchen counter. “I don’t have much and I can’t cook to save my life, but I can make a sandwich? If that’s okay with you?”

Jinyoung isn’t really that hungry yet, being that it’s only 4 in the afternoon, but he’s not about to decline free food (something he learned from Jihoon, of course).

More so when Daehwi’s looking at him with his big beady eyes that’s basically telling him that he has no other choice but to accept gracefully.

“I—sure.” Jinyoung tells Daehwi as the boy beams back at him before going back to his work. Jinyoung, on the other hand, decides to busy himself with the small dining table when he notices that it was crooked.

And he won’t allow it to be crooked, since Jinyoung is, after all, a cultured and capable man.

“I’ll just fix the table—“ before he can even make one round on the wrench he’s holding, Daehwi’s already back beside him, a plain sandwich in his hand.

“Okay, let me just wash—“

“Oh no, it’s okay. I’ll help you!” Daehwi squeaks, setting a glass of water on the table. “Just continue what you’re doing and I’ll feed you.”

Jinyoung almost chokes, baffled by the sudden announcement of Daehwi. He looks at Daehwi with wide, questioning eyes, but the boy doesn’t budge and instead, only tilts his head, an equally confused look written on his face.

Despite himself, Jinyoung holds on to the wrench tighter and reluctantly nods.

_Jinyoung, you and Daehwi are bros and this is normal. Yes, this is a bro thing._

Breathing heavily, Jinyoung takes a big bite out of the sandwich before turning back to the table.

“Is it good?” Daehwi asks, sounding a bit hopeful.

Jinyoung isn’t really fond of sandwiches, but he appreciates how Daehwi didn’t put any unnecessary vegetable (his palate can just be that of a kid’s at times) and instead, went for the safe and classic route which is ham and cheese.

Plus, the cheese is a gooey warm cheddar. Definitely a plus.

Jinyoung nods keenly and Daehwi giggles beside him.

And surprisingly, he finds himself liking the snack more and more compared to the first bite. He says he’s not hungry, but it only takes him a couple of bites before the sandwich is reduced to a meager size.

“It’s nice to see that you appreciate my non-existent cooking skills.”

Jinyoung laughs, focus still on the table’s leg. “Of course.” Without taking his eyes off of the table, he motions to take the last bite but instead of feeling the softness of the bread, his tongue feels something hard and warm and… salty.

“Jinyoung-hyung, there’s… no more…”

_Huh._

Looking back at Daehwi, Jinyoung’s eyes widen as he realizes that he’s biting slash sucking the boy’s fingers. “Shit, Daehwi, I’m sorry—“ And in the twinkling moment of his shock, he knocks the glass of water, accidentally causing it to topple over and drench his white shirt.

Jinyoung takes it back. He’s capable (maybe) but he’s most definitely not even an inch of being cultured.

Quickly grabbing a random towel, Daehwi rubs Jinyoung’s shirt. “Oh my god, are you—“ Jinyoung unconsciously flinches when he feels the coldness of his shirt, as well as Daehwi’s fingers tracing on his skin. “—okay…” Daehwi trails off, eyes going back up to level with Jinyoung’s as his face slowly turn ablaze.

And Jinyoung unconsciously finds himself staring, eyes caught in a spell as he witnesses the blooming roses of Daehwi’s cheeks.

“What’s wrong?” Jinyoung compels himself to ask, eyes still in a reverie. He notices Daehwi averting his gaze, looking back at his shirt, and it was then that Jinyoung snaps, realizing the sheerness of his top. He didn’t even need to look to know that his clothing has been reduced to be a see through shirt.

_Fuck._

Jinyoung abruptly backs away, feeling his ears warming up due to the circumstance. “I… uh, I’m sorry for this—“ he quickly wipes the splashes on the floor with the towel. Once he’s done, he stands up. “The table’s all fixed so… I’ll get going!”

With the same flushed and disconcerted countenance, Daehwi stands up too and smiles awkwardly. “Oh yes, thank you so much for your help!”

“Yeah, no problem. Yeah.” Jinyoung does the same faux laughter and dashes for the door. “Uh, see you later then!” he says last before finally exiting the room.

Once outside, Jinyoung breathes heavily and grimaces when he feels the gush of wind hitting his drenched shirt. He slaps his forehead, recollecting the situation in his head, of how he had accidentally licked Daehwi’s fingers and how he had completely showcased his folly.

_I’m never listening to Jihoon’s ideals of not rejecting free food ever again._

But what disconcerts him more though was how he remembers it clearly – Daehwi’s flushed face. His smooth skin painted in a pretty hue of pink, it compels Jinyoung to think of it the more that he tries to forget.

And just like the usual, he has no idea why.                

_Jinyoung, what the hell is wrong with you._

Jinyoung trudges over to his room and dials on his phone, putting it on loudspeaker once he’s inside.

_“Jinyoungie?”_

“Are you home now?” Jinyoung asks, changing into a new dry shirt. “Can I sleep over at your place tonight?”

_“I’m still at school but I’ll be back in an hour.”_

“I’ll just wait in your room then.”

Jinyoung turns off all electronic devices in his room before leaving.

_“Is there something wrong though? Why all of a sudden?”_

He gives Daehwi’s door a once over for a moment, before he turns on his heels to leave the dorm complex.

“Nothing, I just… I just miss you.”

 

-

 

“ _Hyung, catch me if you can!” A black headed boy continues to run along the field, arms spread midair as his laughter echoes along with the wind._

_“Don’t run or you’ll get hurt—“ Jinyoung gasps when his words become real, the boy tripping on a lone pebble that had materialized out of nowhere and bruising his knee. “See, I told you to be careful!” Jinyoung scolds him, pulling out a handkerchief from his uniform’s pocket as he runs to the boy’s side._

_“Hyung, it hurts…” the boy bites his lips, obviously forcing himself to swallow the sobs that were urging to come out. Jinyoung folds the boy’s pants and immediately wraps the boy’s bloodied knee with his hanky tightly. “Do you really have to wrap it so tightly? It hurts—“_

_Jinyoung taps the boy’s head gently and shakes his head. “We need to put pressure on it so the bleeding will stop.”_

_“Wow, you sure do know your stuff.” The boy chuckles. “You’ve probably did this lots of times.”_

_Jinyoung looks at the boy’s expectant eyes, sees the curved line of his lips, and he smiles. “Yeah, and I will do it all the time for you too.”_

Jinyoung’s eyes shoot open, regaining his consciousness as he gets momentarily blinded by the bright light of the fluorescent lamp on the ceiling.

_Why did I suddenly dream of him?_

 

* * *

 

As soon as Jinyoung leaves his room, Daehwi immediately exhales the breath that he had so long unconsciously held. He jumps on his bed, burying his face on his pillow and screams at the top of his lungs (louder than the lot of any high school cheerleading team at that), trashing everything that his short and thin arms and legs could reach.

From being total and complete strangers, Daehwi and Jinyoung had evolved to being food buddies, with the male even going as far as to lick off the remaining sauce on his hands.

Okay, maybe it was indeed accidental and Daehwi’s just the one who’s giving a meaning to it, but it was still a feat to be considered, given that Jinyoung used to ignore him. Well, the male never really ignored him, but he might as well when he always did his best to run away as fast as he could whenever Daehwi is so much within a meter. 

And Daehwi, despite being a self-proclaimed audacious gay who is loaded with a gun full of tactics and moves, is still very much frail and delicate.

Just being under the gaze of Jinyoung already makes him feel a plethora of things, how much more having to actually have skinship with him – if what happened even counts as one?

Not to mention the fact that he even got to witness a rare sight, of the male getting drenched with water, of his shirt becoming a see through, Daehwi should’ve actually felt bad but instead, he only felt delighted. Despite the guilt, Daehwi couldn’t deny the fact that he felt as if his eyes have been blest and cleansed off of all the ugly in the world, stimulated by the very image of Jinyoung in a plain white shirt which perfectly clung to his immaculate body like a second skin.

Daehwi believes that while he may be a tad too passionate at times, he isn’t all that weird (Woojin would beg to differ). Despite this claim however, he can’t help but trace and etch each and every nook of the male’s form – his face and body – in his mind, as well as the feeling of the lad’s mouth latched on his hand.

And those thoughts alone are enough to send him into overheat, setting his face ablaze once again. It becomes too much for him apparently, as he suddenly feels the rush of liquid through his nose and he only sees red.

_What the hell—a nosebleed?_

Daehwi thanks nobody in particular for being alone in the room for he doesn’t know what kind of face he can ever make if somebody sees him getting a nosebleed over his Adonis. Nobody can’t blame him though, for the events of that day are just too much for his heavily whipped heart.

And never let it be said that he’ll just be calm and keep everything to himself.

He’s Lee Daehwi and Lee Daehwi is never calm (if his sudden nosebleed is anything to go by).

“Hello—“

“Hyung, you wouldn’t believe what just happened.”

“Dae—“

“Adonis! Mr. Adonis happened!”

“What—“

“My Adonis lives right next to me!” Daehwi’s tells his cousin, Woojin, giving the latter no time for briefing. “My Adonis is my dorm mate!”

And as much as he is loved unconditionally (not really) by his cousin, Daehwi doesn’t miss the exasperated sigh made by the male. “First, can you please let me speak?”

“Sure, that I can do.”

“Second, please do enlighten me who’s Mr. Adonis again.”

Daehwi rolls his eyes. “Mr. Adonis is the man I first saw when I was enrolling! Also my classmate! Wow, I know you’re old but I can’t believe you already have dementia.”

“Well, excuse you. Unlike you who’s only preoccupied with his nonexistent love life—“

“It exists! Mr. Adonis exists!”

“—I am too busy trying to study my butt off so I can pass this god forsaken subject.” Woojin heaves another sigh, realizing that no matter what he says, Daehwi wouldn’t be satisfied without ranting about his so called Mr. Adonis. “Fine, I remember Mr. Adonis, but please do brief me with what transpired.”

“Okay, so here’s what happened!”

Daehwi proceeds on to narrate the whole thing, starting from when Woojin had left him for his group study session slash study date the night prior, up to the moment when Jinyoung hurriedly left his room (he makes sure to leave out the part where his nose bleeds, of course) without any breaks, re-counting the events in full detail as like how they have been replaying in his head.

In all fairness to Woojin, his brain still worked and he’s able to digest most of what happened (Daehwi couldn’t be even prouder knowing the fact that Woojin’s brain is even bleaker than his future!), except for an alleged theory that Daehwi believed.

“My Adonis followed me here!” Daehwi exclaims, eyes all bright in realization. “Mr. Adonis moved in next door because of me!”

“Daehwi, listen to me. You moved into that dorm complex a _month_ later after school started.” Woojin tells him – _reminds him._ “I’m pretty sure your _Adonis_ has always been there. Maybe even _before_ you found out about its existence.”

“Okay, you’re right.” Daehwi tells Woojin. “He got here before me.”

Woojin almost gasps, surprised to actually hear his cousin agreeing with him. “See, I told you—“

“He didn’t follow me here. Instead, he waited for me!” Daehwi snickers in satisfaction. “Should I do plan Rooster now then?”

Woojin just facepalms and questions himself why he even bothers with Daehwi. “Okay, sure. You do you.”

Daehwi knows that his cousin doesn’t believe him or any of his claims, but as much as he loves Woojin despite him being such a mood killer, Daehwi doesn’t care. He’s too happy to care. The first time he saw Jinyoung, he only wished to be classmates with him, but God is just so good that he knows what Daehwi really wants and hopes for – to be as near to Jinyoung as possible by being his dorm mate.

And Daehwi couldn’t be more thankful.

_God is real and he loves me._

And if that isn’t enough, Jinyoung himself was the one who suggested and implied that they are friends. It’s no big deal to Daehwi (it really is) since being friends isn’t something that two individuals really agree upon. If he’s being honest, he’d actually like to be more than just that (everybody except the person in question knows this). But Daehwi has to admit, the way Jinyoung said it, the way he seemed so coy, turned his heart into a pile of goo even just a bit.

Then again, everything that Jinyoung does softens Daehwi, drowning him with unicorns, rainbows and butterflies.  

And being that they are friends, Daehwi takes it upon himself to be Jinyoung’s morning alarm clock.

Also known as _Plan Rooster_.

It was very timely how it actually happened, if Daehwi thinks about it. It just so happens that he’s passing by Jinyoung’s door as he is on his way to school when he hears a loud thump from the said room. Confused, he knocks on Jinyoung’s door and asks, “Jinyoung-hyung, are you okay?”

It takes a couple of minutes before the door opens and a frantic Jinyoung appears, hair sticking out in all directions. _Haaaaaaaaa—cute._ “Daehwi!” he greets, a tad too eager so early in the morning. “W-what’s up?”

“Uh nothing, I just heard something from your room so I stopped.” Daehwi smiles.

Jinyoung nods in understanding before letting go of the doorknob and going back inside. “Sorry, it’s because I woke up late again and fell on the floor when I realized.” Jinyoung explains as he grabs all of his stuff to prepare. Daehwi watches in amusement, seeing a completely different side of the male in contrast to his usual stoic and prim appearance.

And again, Daehwi couldn’t help but giggle.

“Come on, let’s go.” Jinyoung tells Daehwi as he goes out after fixing himself. The two of them walk side by side, with Jinyoung trying to pacify his messed hair. Daehwi, on the other hand, simply watches him, both enamored and in disbelief that he’s actually walking to school with his Adonis. “Sorry, because of me you got interrupted.”

“It’s okay, we have enough time.” Daehwi shakes his head. “Is this the reason why you always come to our morning class just barely before it starts?” Jinyoung only smiles guiltily and Daehwi laughs. “Bingo.”

“I just have a hard time waking up in the mornings. I mean, I set up alarms but I could just never wake up on time.” Jinyoung explains. “If Jihoon doesn’t call me I wouldn’t wake up at all, and I feel bad since he doesn’t have morning classes but still needs to wake up early because of me.” The male sighs, giving his hair one last swipe.

 _He must be really close to Jihoon-sunbae. I mean, Woojin-hyung’s my cousin but I wouldn’t exchange my morning sleep because of him._ Daehwi bites his lips in deep thought, looking at the lone stray hair at the back of Jinyoung’s head that the male missed. Daehwi instinctively touches Jinyoung’s head, patting the said hair. Jinyoung flinches, surprised by the touch and Daehwi chuckles.

“Sorry if I scared you. You missed one at the back.”

Jinyoung hurries to comb his hair again and asks, “there, is it better?” he ducks his head, showing it to Daehwi.

Daehwi only grits his teeth, fighting back the urge to take in the male’s black hair, to breathe in his cotton scent.

_Stop being a weirdo, Daehwi. Please. Not now._

“Yeah, it’s okay now.” Daehwi gives Jinyoung a thumbs up and the male gives him a small smile in return. It was then that Daehwi finally decides to push through with his plan rooster. “Also, if you want, I can wake you up instead?”

Jinyoung raises an eyebrow at him. “What do you mean?”

“Well, since we have the same schedule anyway and I literally live right next to you… it won’t be as much of a hassle to me compared to how it is to Jihoon-sunbae.” Daehwi explains. He actually feels bad for using Jihoon as an excuse (he hadn’t even met the male properly before) but then it’s not exactly an excuse either. Jinyoung needs someone to wake him up and Daehwi needs to get close to the male more. By volunteering to be his morning alarm clock, it will just be a win-win situation to the both of them.

Jihoon will also benefit from it since he wouldn’t have to wake up early for Jinyoung.

_Daehwi, you really are a genius. Plan Rooster is a success._

Although he looks a bit hesitant, Jinyoung eventually nods. “I’ll have to take that offer then. I’m warning you now though, I can be hard to wake up.”

Daehwi chuckles as they finally reach their building. “Don’t worry, I won’t back out.” He says, “Besides, how hard can it be?”

Apparently, it is indeed hard.

The next day during his trial run for plan rooster, even as Daehwi knocks on Jinyoung’s door for the nth time, there isn’t any sign of response. So despite not having asked permission from Jinyoung, he jots in the male’s passcode – 059900 – which he saw the night when Jinyoung first invited him in for dinner, and shamelessly enters the said male’s room.

Once inside, he trudges towards the male’s bed and sees Jinyoung buried in his duvet, two king sized pillows on both of his sides securing him. The male had his mouth slightly ajar, his breathing in a steady pace as small snores slip out every now and then.

Daehwi wonders how one could look so innocent and pure – impeccable even – while sleeping (Daehwi’s pretty sure that he only looks like a train wreck while he’s sleeping). In contrast to his manly image, Jinyoung, sleeping together with a bunch of pillows and pastel blue sheets is too adorable and heartening that Daehwi actually considers ditching class to just watch him and relish in his rawest moments.

But then he’s sure that Jinyoung, contrary to him who doesn’t care that much, won’t appreciate ditching class.

So Daehwi suddenly finds himself practicing self-control, shaking the boy’s shoulder instead of caressing his face (which he oh so wanted to do the moment he saw his impeccable sleeping face). “Jinyoung-hyung, wake up! We need to go to class!”

But then Jinyoung doesn’t respond, so Daehwi drops the gentle act and pinches his cheeks – which he swears he did because he needed to wake the male up, not because it’s what he’s been wanting to do since forever.

Fortunately, it worked and Jinyoung stirs, opening his eyes slowly. “Daehwi?” Daehwi pulls him up to sit and almost coos when the male rubs his eyes so adorably.

“Good morning, hyung!” Daehwi chirps. “I’ll go back to my room to get ready. I’ll be back once I’m done so get moving—“ Daehwi sees Jinyoung’s eyes closing again so he shouts, “And don’t go back to sleep!”

Jinyoung flinches, looking so lost as he sees Daehwi’s head from the door. He then nods and mumbles a thanks before finally standing up.

Ever since then, Daehwi doesn’t hesitate anymore whenever he enters the male’s room without any warning. He did tell Jinyoung that he’ll wake him up without specifying how and the male agreed so basically, any way is welcome. Besides, Jinyoung never questioned Daehwi about how he found out about his passcode, nor his daily entrance into his room. Daehwi guesses that Jinyoung’s always so unstable in the morning and by the time that he actually gets his consciousness together, he’d already forgotten about the passcode so Daehwi just considers it to be his green light.

But then never let it be said that Daehwi will get used to the routine, or that he’ll get used to seeing Jinyoung’s vulnerable and defenseless state every morning, because never will he be. No matter how many times he does it, the desire to hold Jinyoung in his arms and just relish in that moment is still very much alive, unrelenting even as the days slowly pass by.

But he knows that things take time. Even as he is deeply enticed to tackle and throw himself to Jinyoung at every given moment of which they are together, Daehwi, being a refined and civilized individual that he is (again, Woojin and maybe Daniel and Jaehwan would beg to differ), will keep himself in check because he is a good and loyal friend.

Yes, because Daehwi is _only_ Jinyoung’s friend.

But that doesn’t mean that it’s the same to others. Apparently, to other people, the tides have changed and he isn’t just Jinyoung’s friend anymore.

“Is there something going on with you two?”

Both Daehwi and Jinyoung turn to look at Jaehwan in question as they take their seats at the back of the room behind both Daniel and Jaehwan. Jinyoung lets his bag down and nods at both Daniel and Jaehwan as the two greet him back.

By association with Daehwi, Jinyoung has leveled up his relationship with the two seniors as well, and while they may not be as close to him like they are with Daehwi, it still is a feat given that it took almost more than a month for Daehwi to successfully intrude Jinyoung’s life and execute plan rooster while it only took them one week.

_These bitches should thank me for even letting them be graced by my Adonis’ presence._

“Hyung, what do you mean?” Jinyoung asks, turning to Jaehwan. He then fishes out his phone once he feels it vibrating. “Oh sorry, but I need to get this.” He tells the three before standing up to leave his seat. “Yeah, Jihoon? I’m already in my class…”

Once Jinyoung’s out of his seat, Daehwi goes back to Jaehwan and gives him a stink eye. “What the hell was that all about? Stop it.”

“Stop what?” Jaehwan asks, feigning innocence. “I’m just asking if something’s going on since you two have been quite close lately.”

“Jaehwan has a point.” Daniel tells Daehwi. “I mean, you literally go to class together every day. I’m sure even some of our classmates have been noticing that.” He shrugs. “I don’t even see Jihoon that much anymore and he’s the only one who Jinyoung hung out with in the past.”

A smile creeps up on Daehwi’s lips upon hearing their words, feeling elated at the thought that people actually think that there’s something going on between him and Jinyoung. It’s trivial but he can’t help it, especially if it’s the proof that there’s definitely progress between them.

But Daehwi knows more than to tolerate rumors so despite himself, he dismisses the thought.

“Nothing’s going on with Jinyoung-hyung and I, okay?” Daehwi clarifies, but follows up with a smirk. “But don’t worry, I can definitely do something about that.”

Jaehwan gives him a thumbs up combined with an all knowing smirk as Daehwi winks at him. Daniel, on the contrary, scrunches his eyebrows. “But isn’t Jinyoung already taken? Or that’s what I thought back when we were still in high school.”

“What?” Daehwi spats out. “You went to the same high school as Jinyoung-hyung?”

Daehwi raises an eyebrow at Daniel in bewilderment, but before he can even interrogate the older further, Jinyoung’s already back in his seat at the same time as their professor enters the room.

“So before we start the lecture, I’ll just let you know about an assignment due next month.” Mr. Hwang suddenly announces without so much as a greeting, proceeding to show a movie poster on the projector. “Everybody is required to watch the upcoming movie, ‘ _The Pride and Prejudice_ ’ and do a reaction paper about it. This will be a joint paper for two so you need to group yourselves in pairs. Any further details will be available in our group, I’ll be posting it later.”

Daehwi doesn’t quite absorb the rest of the details about their assignment as he sneaks in a glimpse of Jinyoung, who is discreetly busy fiddling with his phone under the table. And as Daniel’s words suddenly reappear in his thoughts, he waits for their roll call so he can ask the older about it. Contrary to his assumptions though, Mr. Hwang doesn’t take an attendance that day and proceeds to his lecture, so Daehwi just dismisses the thought and focuses on the lesson.


	5. Pine Tree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Incoming Plan _LTE_  
>  \- Jinyoung reminds himself that Daehwi is just his _bro_ so it will only be a _bro_ date.  
> \- Daehwi, despite knowing that it's only a _bro_ date, still rejoices because he is indeed a proud and confident gay.  
> \- BEWARE, a couple of flashbacks uwu

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if I was late for a week.  
> My friend knew this but I wasn't able to finish ch 7 on time so I had to push this chapter a week later.  
> BUT JINYOUNG OPENED HIS FANCAFE DKFJADS;FKJASJFS  
> So to celebrate, I had to post this of course!
> 
> GIVE LOTS OF LOVE TO OUR BAEBY!!!
> 
> Anyway, not too long but HERE YA GO  
> XOXO

[Pine Tree](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ix3Pn6yMMSM)

* * *

It was the dismissal time of their last subject when Jinyoung hears a groan coming from none other than Jaehwan. If it was only him, Jinyoung would’ve understand since apparently, the male can never be satisfied with anything. Albeit, this time, Daniel’s voice also appears, seemingly frustrated just as much, and that’s saying a lot being that the male is the opposite of Jaehwan – very patient and lax despite the occasional eccentricity.

This Jinyoung learns or rather picks up in the span of two weeks that he had been hanging out with Daniel and Jaehwan because of his association with Daehwi. Jinyoung actually went to the same high school as Daniel before, but being the recluse that he was, he never really got to know the male more than he should. If he’s being honest, he’s still very much intolerant and would still rather be by himself (or maybe with Jihoon or Daehwi), but after being with the two for some time, he deems that maybe he can digest their presence. Besides, they’re Daehwi’s friends anyway so Jinyoung’s sure that they’re harmless.

If Daehwi being able to withstand their presence _despite_ establishing a good friendship with them on accident isn’t an indication that they really are harmless people, then Jinyoung doesn’t know what is. To be really sure though, he had also asked Jihoon about Jaehwan (he and Jihoon go way back with Daniel but it was a different case for Jaehwan) and apparently, they are also friends. It’s a mystery to him how he didn’t know of that fact, but he ignores it, realizing that it was indeed him who had always chose to overlook other people’s presence.

“Of all times, it really has to rain now.”

Jinyoung finally decides to take notice of the grayness of the sky, as well as the incessant downpour that greets them just as they arrive by the lobby of their department building. It wasn’t a random occurrence; Jinyoung checked the weather forecast that morning and noted that there is a 40% chance of rain. It’s not half, but Jinyoung knew better than to take a risk.

“You two, do you have an umbrella?” Daniel asks Daehwi and Jinyoung as he and Jaehwan take out their umbrellas.

Jinyoung turns back to Daehwi and the latter nods. “How about you?” Daehwi asks, biting his lips a while later before continuing, “If you don’t have one… then maybe we can share?”

Jinyoung hears a snort from behind him, presumably from Jaehwan but he chooses to ignore it, already becoming accustomed to the quirks of the senior – snickering whenever he and Daehwi so much as talks – despite still being clueless to the exact reason.

“Well, if you two don’t mind, we’ll go ahead first, okay?” Jaehwan tells them and Jinyoung only nods in return. As they slowly walk under the rain, he barely sees Daniel punching Jaehwan in the arm and he chuckles, dismissing the earlier weirdness of the male.

“So?”

Jinyoung whips his head back to Daehwi and sees the lad holding out a black umbrella. “Thanks, but I’m good. I brought an umbrella with me too.” Jinyoung says, taking out his pink one.

Upon catching sight of his umbrella, Daehwi’s eyes turn into crescents and he covers his mouth, fighting back a laugh. “I didn’t think you’d actually use anything colored pink. That’s so cute!”

Jinyoung scratches his nape, feeling the heat rushing to his cheeks. “I—t-thanks, I guess? This is actually Jihoon’s.” Jinyoung says. “I’m going to wait for him, so if you want, you can go back ahead of me—“

“Jinyoung!”

Both Daehwi and Jinyoung’s heads shoot up at the call, seeing a brunette headed male running towards them from the second floor. Jinyoung’s eyes light up in recognition and he smiles. “Hey.”

“Sorry, I’m late! Mr. Ong was being a bitch again and wouldn’t let us out without ranting about how annoying Sir Hwang is. As if anybody cares!” Jihoon flails his hands in the air for effect, obviously frustrated with his life – his professor to be exact – and doesn’t take notice of Daehwi.

Not until the said boy chuckles and agrees. “I mean, they really need to make up their minds, right?” Daehwi adds. “Every time we see them together, they always look like they want to either punch or kiss each other – we can’t really tell!”

“I know! It’s so annoying how that’s so true.” The two of them laugh for a couple of moments and unlike before when Jinyoung had tried so hard to keep Jihoon from meeting Daehwi, this time he actually feels glad.

For once, he actually feels pleased to see, to know that two of them seem to possibly connect.

Jihoon turns to Jinyoung in query however, and Jinyoung immediately gets it without saying, proceeding to introduce Daehwi. “This is Lee Daehwi, my next door dorm mate. You two already saw each other before, but I don’t know if you still remember—“

“Ah! You!” Jihoon stomps his fist in his palm, recollecting their first meeting. “You were the one talking to Jinyoung before! Do you remember me? I waved at you!” Jihoon asks eagerly and Jinyoung almost wants to slap his hand on the male’s mouth, afraid that Daehwi might be overwhelmed.

But Jinyoung should’ve known better, being that Daehwi’s not the infamous social frosh for nothing. “Of course I remember you, Jihoon-sunbae.” Daehwi greets back with a wide grin. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

“By the way, how’s your room?” Jihoon asks and Daehwi looks at him questioningly. “Oh, I’ve heard from Jinyoung that he helped you set up some stuff.”

“Oh that,” Daehwi nods. “Everything’s good. Jinyoung-hyung set up everything really nicely." He takes a peek at Jinyoung and smiles. “Jinyoung-hyung has been very helpful.”

Jinyoung, for whatever reason there is, suddenly feels bashful and scratches his arms. “It’s nothing—“

“Definitely nothing compared to what you do for him every morning,” Jihoon snorts, shaking his head at Jinyoung in dissatisfaction. The latter averts his gaze in turn and Daehwi just laughs. “But kidding aside, thank you for waking him up every morning. I know it’s a hassle—“

“Oh no, definitely not! It’s the least I can do after Jinyoung-hyung helped me with my room.” Daehwi shakes his head. “Besides, it’s like a compensation since hyung also cooks and lets me eat dinner with him every night. I should at least return the favor, right?”

Hearing Daehwi’s words, the smile on Jihoon’s face suddenly dismisses. Jinyoung then remembers that he forgot to let Jihoon know of that, of how Daehwi had been hanging out in his room every night to eat dinner together. He feels a tad guilty and decides to ask Jihoon if anything’s wrong, but the male is quicker to bring back the gleeful countenance on his face.

“Well, that’s good. At least Jinyoung’s circle is getting bigger. I’m actually proud!” Jihoon grabs his chest for effect and Daehwi chuckles. “I’m sorry though, but I have to cut our conversation short since I need to go.” Hearing this, Jinyoung raises an eyebrow at him but Jihoon only continues. “It’s really nice to meet you, Daehwi. You should invite me to your room, I’d love to hangout sometime!” Jihoon holds both of Daehwi’s hands as the latter nods.

“Sure, any time you’re free.” Daehwi says and Jihoon beams at him.

“Now, if you’ll excuse us…” Jihoon turns to Jinyoung and grabs his hand, pulling him a couple of meters away from their initial location.

When Jinyoung sees Daehwi opening his umbrella, he shouts, “Daehwi, can you wait for a bit?”

Surprised by the male’s sudden change of mind, Daehwi reluctantly nods with an unsure smile and closes his umbrella back again before taking a seat on a waiting bench not far from them.

Turning back to Jihoon, Jinyoung asks, “What do you mean you need to go? I thought we’re going home together? I’m going to sleep at your place tonight, right?”

“About that…” Jihoon trails off, biting his lips and seeing the gesture, Jinyoung already knows that their plan’s cancelled.

_Again._

“I might not go back to my place tonight.”

To say that Jinyoung is surprised is understated; he’s baffled since Jihoon doesn’t really like staying over at other people’s places – even his. “Why?” he asks calmly.

“Woojin and I are going to try and finish our project and to actually have a chance at that, I reckoned it would be better if we do an all-nighter so we’re going to stay at his place.”

 

_“Sorry, did I wake you up?”_

_Jinyoung slowly sits up as he hears the voice, turning towards the door entrance only to see Jihoon removing his shoes. He shakes his head, sees the time on the clock – 00:13 – and asks, “Why are you so late?”_

_“Woojin and I tried to do as much as we could for our project.” Jihoon explains, taking a seat beside Jinyoung on his bed._

_“So did you finish?”_

_Jihoon shakes his head and sighs. Jinyoung chuckles._

_“Next time let me know if you’re going to be late so I can pick you up.”_

_“It’s okay, Woojin dropped me off here.”_

_“Oh.” Jinyoung’s simply answers, his countenance unknowingly turning impassive. “Then I guess that’s fine…”_

_“Don’t worry, okay?” Jihoon cups Jinyoung’s face gently with a reassuring smile as the latter closes his eyes and nuzzles into the former’s touch, relishing in the warmth of his hands. After a while, Jihoon stands up and reaches over to Jinyoung’s hand. “Let’s eat? I brought Jokbal.”_

_Jinyoung, despite wanting to stay in the moment, agrees and nods with a small smile._

A sudden passing memory from the last time he slept over at Jihoon’s place suddenly resurfaces, and a peculiar feeling makes its way into his consciousness. He thought about asking Jihoon why couldn’t they just stay at his place instead, but decides otherwise and just smiles.

“Okay... but do you have to go now?”

Jihoon nods with a frown. “Woojin’s already at his place so…”

“Do you want me to drop you off there then?” Jinyoung asks. “Do you even know where he lives?”

“It’s okay. I’ve been there before so I know the way.”

_When? How come I don’t remember you telling me this?_

“Can I borrow your umbrella though? I forgot mine, sorry.” Jihoon laughs awkwardly but despite the confusion going on in his head, Jinyoung nods and gives his umbrella. “Oh wait, this is mine!” Jihoon huffs while Jinyoung just smiles.

“I’ll just… go home with Daehwi then.”

Jinyoung trails off and waits for a few lull seconds. Contrary to his expectations however, Jihoon simply nods. “Text me later?” Jihoon gives him one last smile before turning to go.

Jinyoung, on impulse, grabs his wrist though and mumbles, “I… I’m sorry.”

Jihoon looks at him, puzzled. “For what?”

_For not telling you about Daehwi._

Jinyoung only stares at him, contemplates about the words to use, but ends up shaking his head.

“Nothing.” Jinyoung simply says. He lets go of Jihoon’s wrist and smiles. “Good luck on your project.”

Jihoon returns the smile and nods. He waves at Jinyoung a little before finally turning the opposite way and leaving Jinyoung all to himself.

Breathing heavily, Jinyoung pivots back and approaches Daehwi, who was seated on a waiting bench. Jinyoung stays still in his position, a good two meters away from Daehwi and watches as the boy stare at his open palm, catching the drops of the rain before letting it drip down his arms. His eyes are affixed at the sky, still possessing a glimmer despite the lack of illumination around him.

Daehwi, upon noticing his presence, turns to look at Jinyoung and smiles.

_“Jinyoung-hyung, always smile.” He beams, poking both ends of Jinyoung’s lips and tugs them upwards. “I love your smile the most.”_

Very akin to the smile Jinyoung had long _missed_.

It was only for a brief moment, but Jinyoung feels as if he has seen it before – the small thin and red lips that possessed the most beautiful smile he had ever witnessed – even prior to their first meeting. He had always thought of it that way, even when he first saw Daehwi, and every single time, he feels his heart thumping, beating steadily in comparison to the turmoil in his head.

_Jinyoung, he’s long gone. He has long left you._

_He’s not coming back._

Because it’s impossible yet something tells him, _wills_ him to believe that it is possible.

“Jinyoung-hyung,” Daehwi calls, opening the umbrella as he approaches Jinyoung. “Let’s go?”

Jinyoung nods and takes the umbrella from Daehwi before they start walking under the rain.

The rain keeps on pelting their shared umbrella, but Jinyoung is grateful that it was big enough to cover them both, to allow a space to be in between them.

Big enough to keep Jinyoung from delving further into the past.

Just like Daehwi’s words, for the past few weeks that the male had been waking him up in the morning, Jinyoung, to make it even, cooks dinner more than his portion and lets the younger eat with him. If he thinks about it more, being that they are also classmates, they’ve been sticking to each other for the most part – walking to school together, eating lunch together, and even dinner. Daehwi would sometimes even stay past dinner so they can do their coursework together. It wasn’t an arrangement they agreed upon, but it just happened naturally as time passed by.

And with the two weeks that they had started the routine, it had also been two weeks since Jinyoung had last spent time together with Jihoon.

He should feel bad and lonely for being unable to be with Jihoon for the longest time since he first entered college, but instead, he feels nothing. He felt something peculiar when Jihoon had cancelled out on him, on their only time together after two weeks, but it was normal. It was nothing violent.  

Even as Jihoon had been frequently spending more time with another aside from him, Jinyoung understands.

Unlike how he had been seeing the remnants of his past in a person he had only met recently. Unlike how it had been so incomprehensible for him to know why.

And Jinyoung doesn’t like it, how he keeps on seeing the past in Daehwi for it was impossible.

 _That_ child is gone yet Daehwi is here beside him.

 _He_ broke his promise. _He_ would never return.

_Would he?_

In a split second, Jinyoung grabs Daehwi and pushes him to the side, letting the younger’s back crash against a concrete wall. Jinyoung hugs and covers him just in time to dodge a speeding car that passes by them.

“Watch it!” the car honks at least three times before moving again.

Fortunately, Jinyoung was quick to see the car coming so they weren’t hit. His bag and some parts of his pants, on the other hand, had taken a critical visual damage being that it was slathered with the rain water brought about by the car speeding.

_At least my pants are black._

“H-hyung…”

Jinyoung snaps out of his thoughts when he hears Daehwi’s small voice. He looks down and sees the male staring back at him with a gaze in between shock and trepidation, his small hands crumpled against Jinyoung’s chest for support.

_Shit._

Jinyoung, in one big heavy breath, realizes the situation and almost too instantly, notices how his heart has been pounding heavily. Daehwi seems to realize this too as rather than being anxious of their almost accident, his eyes trail all over Jinyoung and asks, “Hyung, are you okay?”

In an attempt to overshadow the erratic noise of his heart, Jinyoung grabs Daehwi’s hands and takes them off his chest as he backs away before surveying the boy’s body. “I’m okay, and you?”

Daehwi nods in response but stops when he sees the drenched state of Jinyoung’s bag and pants. “You’re soaked though.”

Jinyoung shakes his head with a smile. “It’s okay, it’ll dry as we walk.” Just as he lets go of the latter’s hand though, the rain starts to pick up and despite the decent coverage of their shared umbrella, Jinyoung still feels the wetness slathering on his skin (then again, he’s more concerned that Daehwi might get wet so 60% of their space is allotted for the younger).

“ _Okay_? Oh, please.” Daehwi slides his arm around Jinyoung’s waist and pulls him back, allowing for the two of them to practically be attached to each other. The gesture causes for some droplets of rain to flicker on Daehwi’s skin, but the lad only grins, eyes turning into crescents as he says, “There, much better,  right?”

And Jinyoung feels dizzy, his surroundings becoming a blur in unison with the din of the rain, obscured and drowned by the fast and harsh beating of his heart.

_Bae Jinyoung, what is wrong with you?_

If Daehwi felt any awkwardness with what happened, he didn’t show any of it and instead, only made the atmosphere a lot more bearable. To keep Jinyoung from moving away again, Daehwi had clung to his arm and locked him in place as they walked back in silence. Daehwi would occasionally drop a few words here and there, but the rain was too loud even, showering their umbrella rather harshly, so there wasn’t really any room for conversation.

And while, in unison with the rain, Jinyoung was showered with a million of conflicting thoughts, the walk back home wasn’t as awkward as he first thought it would be. If he’s being honest, he might actually be the only one thinking too hard – _again_ – bordering and confusing himself with the past and the present.

But how can he not when all he can see is the soft smile on Daehwi’s face?

It’s safe to say that Jinyoung, despite everything, still lived through the conflicting moment as he and Daehwi finally arrives at their dorm after at least a couple more minutes. Their dorm isn’t that far anyway even though to Jinyoung it felt like forever or rather, a part of him wanted it to be forever.

But he’s not about to say that out loud, of course.

“Finally, we’re here!” Daehwi chirps once they take cover in the lobby. Jinyoung closes the umbrella and follows after Daehwi as they both make their way up to the second floor. “The rain is unrelenting, huh.” Daehwi asks, looking out the balcony as Jinyoung hums in response.

It was then when Jinyoung suddenly stops and crashes on to Daehwi’s chest, the latter standing still at the top of the stairs. “Jinyoung-hyung, do you want to watch a movie together?”

Jinyoung looks up and sees Daehwi’s smile – bright and clear despite the gloomy weather – and his breath hitches.

_Thump thump._

“I… uh…” Jinyoung’s articulation is suddenly missing yet again.

And again, what’s new?

“I mean, we do our coursework together anyway so I thought maybe you’d want to just be partners for that joint report in literature and watch the movie together.”

Jinyoung blinks. “What.”

Staring back at him, Daehwi suddenly pulls a sly smile and says, “What, did you think I was asking you out for a date?”

And Jinyoung, despite believing that he had overcame his gay panic moments, suddenly loses his sense of touch and finds himself unable to control the emotions on his face. “I—“ he stutters, cheeks ablaze as his eyebrows scrunches. “I didn’t—wait n-no, I mean—“

“If you don’t want to, it’s fine.” Daehwi cuts him off. “I mean it’s not like I’m asking you out on a date or something—just as bros.” Daehwi gives him a small smile, before turning forward again and continuing walking.

And Jinyoung, with a deep hefty breath, walks briskly after Daehwi and grabs his hand. “I… I want to.” Jinyoung knows that his face is beet red at that moment and that his folly is on full display, but he keeps his gaze intact, completely drowning out the havoc ongoing in his mind.

“You want to… what?”

_And heart._

“I want to watch the movie with you.” _As bros._ “Let’s watch the movie together… as bros.”

Daehwi’s face immediately brightens up and he nods eagerly, gripping Jinyoung’s hand back tightly. “Okay, as _bros_.”

A smile erupts in Jinyoung’s face before he unconsciously let’s go of Daehwi’s hand and pats his head. “Go wash up and come to my room after for dinner.”

Biting his lower lips, Daehwi simply nods with a smile.

 

* * *

 

 

Daehwi stares into the blank wall of his room and sees its beige coating becoming pink, similar to the shade which were spread across the apple of Jinyoung’s cheeks. He hears beating sounds, a steady but fast rhythm just like the one he felt from Jinyoung’s chest. He feels the warmth in his room, hot even, just as much as how he felt when Jinyoung held his hand.

And Daehwi, amidst almost getting hit by a car and drenched by the rain, only remembers his Adonis’ face, bright and warm in contrast to the solemn weather.

Because his priorities are clearly set.

_“I want to watch the movie with you.”_

Daehwi tackles his pillows and screams, pounding his fists and feet onto his bed in an effort to release the pent up elation that he felt. He makes sure not to scream too loud though, in fear that the reason for his current distress is already asleep and hopefully resting well (since all he wants is for Adonis to have a good night’s sleep, of course).

After having dinner at Jinyoung’s place, a dinner that consisted of the most delicious kimchi fried rice Daehwi has ever tasted (he swears he’s being unbiased with this but then again, he’ll also eat anything that Jinyoung hands to him so the statement is debatable), Daehwi didn’t stay for too long since he knows that the male is tired.

Besides, Daehwi himself feels like bursting at any given moment that he was with Jinyoung.

Outside, Daehwi looks just like the confident young adult who won’t let anything stand in his way, but internally, he’s just your average teenage girl (gay) pining excruciatingly for his unrequited crush.

No matter how good of an actor he is, Daehwi is still indeed just like any other individual who is not a stranger to the butterflies and unicorns that their crushes give.

Since Daehwi is, after all, admittedly and horribly gay for Bae Jinyoung.

_Bzzz._

Just when he is in need of someone to hear his poem about the epitome of beauty and grace that is Bae Jinyoung, Daehwi receives a call from none other than his cousin, Woojin. “Right on time, I need you to help me pick an outfit to wear.” Daehwi answers in a heartbeat.

“I—uh, what for?” Woojin asks, despite the random greeting.

“I’m going on a date.”

The line stays silent for a couple of moments and Daehwi repeats, “I’m going on a date—“

“I heard you the first time.”

“Then why didn’t you answer?”

“I was waiting for you to say, ‘just kidding’.” Daehwi closes his eyes and breathes heavily, finding the resolve to not lash out while Woojin continues, “Anyway, who’s the unlucky guy?”

“Shut up,” Daehwi snaps, akin to a squeal if he’s being honest (his gayness is leaking). “Of course, it’s with none other than my Mr. Adonis.” he says smugly. “We’re going out to watch a movie, heh.”

“Is this for that movie report from sir Hwang?” 

Silence.

“If so, then that means I’m also going on a date with Jihoon then.”

Daehwi’s face morphs into a mixture of both disbelief and amazement. “Didn’t you tell me Jihoon-sunbae has a boyfriend already? Wow, hyung, you’re more shameless than I thought you originally were.”

“I wasn’t the one who treated it as a date.” Woojin retorts. “It’s only for a reaction paper that’s why we’re going to watch it together. Yours is the same too, so I’m just copying what you said.”

“But yours and ours are different!”

“How is it any different?”

“At least I’m not trying to covet someone who’s already in a relationship!” Daehwi points out. “You even dropped him off at his dorm last time, remember? Wow, really slick, hyung.”

“That was because I kept him out late! And he said his boyfriend understands, so…” Woojin clears his throat but Daehwi isn’t about to take any of his bullshits. “Anyway, aren’t you going to watch a movie just for the reaction paper too? Then it’s just the same. Yours isn’t a date then—“

“It _is_ a date!”

“Is it the same to your Mr. Adonis though?”

Silence.

“See, we really are cousins. You’re just as hopeless as me.”

Daehwi gasps, unable to believe the absurdity that his cousin was spouting, of how he really dares to compare himself to Daehwi when he couldn’t even talk to Jihoon until only recently.

_Me? Hopeless? Hah._

All the signs are green per Daehwi’s observation. There’s no way that his feelings will be hopeless.

“Sooner or later, it’ll become a date for him too so shut up and just help me pick an outfit for Saturday.” Daehwi hisses, getting off his bed to sort through his cabinet. “It’s time to put plan _LTE_ into action.”

And even against his better judgment, Woojin still acquiesces and answers Daehwi’s invite for video call.

It doesn’t take long for Daehwi to choose an outfit since he actually had an outfit in mind already. A combination of a white tee with blue stripes plus black ripped jeans which he bought in the states before going back. He had saved it for a special occasion so when Saturday came, he need not to think twice as he wears the ensemble, knowing full well that there won’t be any more special day than that day.

His first date with Bae Jinyoung.

Granted, the whole agreement is going out as ‘bros’ but who is he kidding, really? If him preparing for his outfit three days before the fated day and putting on extra effort in his nightly skin care routine the night prior aren’t indications of him thinking of their movie plan as more than just a simple platonic ‘bro’ date, then Daehwi doesn’t know what is.

And Daehwi wouldn’t really know anything since ever since the first time he saw Jinyoung, he already knew that their relationship is going to be beyond than just being mere friends.

And as time passed by, the more that he spent time with Jinyoung, the more that he hoped and maybe felt that the male might be the same as him too.

“Good morning.”

Daehwi stops just as he opens his door, sighting Jinyoung casually standing right outside the balcony of their dorm, looking just as glorious as how he usually is. Clad in a white dress shirt underneath a navy blue striped v neck sweater and distressed gray cardigan plus the same black ripped jeans, Jinyoung’s lightly tanned skin is masked a golden hue by the bright sun, his small pink lips formed into a beautiful curve, and his chocolate brown orbs, clear and vivid as he looks back.

And Daehwi, with his heart utterly full, feels as if he can’t breathe, too enamored by the ethereal like being before him.

_Mamaaaa—_

But being the confident gay he proudly and truly is, Daehwi takes one heavy breath and smiles _._ “Good morning, Jinyoung-hyung.” He locks the door behind him and says, “I can’t say I’m not surprised that you’re up early today. You excited or something?” Daehwi teases but instead of seeing his expected flushed face, he only hears a chuckle.

“Yeah, I’m excited.” Jinyoung then tilts his head to the side and grins. “You look nice today, Hwi.”

_Hwi._

Despite himself, Daehwi feels inhibited, attacked by his very own words. He breathes in and out repeatedly, trying to calm the fast beating of his heart and hopes that Jinyoung doesn’t hear it. “T-thank you!” he chirps a tad too loudly. “You look cute today too, hyung!”

And that’s when it reappears – the flushed cheeks, the constipated expression, the bashful(maybe) gay Jinyoung.

“T-thanks.” Jinyoung mumbles but then quickly clears his throat. “What do you say we eat first? There’s a good _gopchang_ place around here—“

“Oh! I know that place! It’s good—“ Daehwi’s suddenly stops and blinks, realizing something. “But we’ll be grilling then.”

Jinyoung raises an eyebrow in query. “What about—oh. The smoke.” Jinyoung laughs as soon as he understands what Daehwi means. “It’s okay, you’ll only be with me for the day anyway.”

_But that’s the exact reason why I’m even worrying about this!_

Daehwi bites his lips, trying his best to control his facial mien amidst his internal struggle – but is obviously failing.

“If it helps, I’ll smell of smoke too.” Jinyoung smiles. “We’ll be even, okay?”

Between his pride of being a difficult individual and his absolute gayness for Jinyoung, the latter obviously wins. Then again, he isn’t about to be choosy and difficult if it’s Jinyoung himself who was asking him.

_Maybe if it’s Woojin-hyung or the two repeaters…_

And in a few minutes of basking in the fact that he’s actually eating out with Jinyoung, Daehwi eventually finds himself seated in a random corner of the _gopchang_ place. There isn’t a lot of patrons yet but it’s going to start picking up soon, Daehwi guesses, and feels lucky that they got a good seat away from people.

Not only is the place clean and spacious, but the service is good too. Just a few minutes since they placed their order (which is 2 sets), one of the staffs immediately brings it over and places it on the empty grill to start cooking.

“Hwi, here,” Jinyoung hands him his chopsticks and proceeds to wipe his with a napkin. The male also makes sure to wipe the other utensils they will be using before he hands it over to Daehwi.

Daehwi watches him in amazement, a smile unknowingly making its way to his lips as he sees the focused gaze of the male. “I can’t believe you actually do these.”

Jinyoung gives one last swipe to their bowl and shrugs. “Nothing wrong with being sure.”

Daehwi only nods. He grabs the scissors and tongs and motions for the intestines but stops when he sees Jinyoung’s hands on his. “I’ll do it.” Jinyoung takes the utensils from him and starts cutting the parts.

Daehwi, on the contrary, quickly pulls his hands back, holding them tight together to keep himself from doing something to harm his very fragile heart (which is to go back and not let go of the tongs so Jinyoung can just hold his hands forever), all the while silently praying to God to give him an incomparable sense of self control.

And sense of self-preservation at that.

“So,” Daehwi clears his throat, trying to regain his composure. “Since when have you stayed at that dorm?”

Jinyoung stops for a moment at the sudden question and purses his lips in thought. He then titters after a while as he says, “Almost two months? I moved in before classes even started. Well, technically, Jihoon did.”

Daehwi raises an eyebrow in query. “What do you mean Jihoon-sunbae did?”

“Jihoon used to stay in the room where I’m staying at but ended up moving to a new one so I just continued leasing the room.” Jinyoung explains.

“You’re pretty close to Jihoon-sunbae huh,” Daehwi comments as he receives a piece from Jinyoung who only continues to cook.

“I’ve known Jihoon since high school so yeah, we’re really close.” Jinyoung sets the tongs down and starts eating himself. “To be honest, as you can see, I don’t have a lot of friends so I really only have Jihoon.”

“Hey, I’m right here!” Daehwi pouts, rousing a laughter from Jinyoung. “I’m your friend too!” _Even though I want to be more than that…_

“Of course, you are, silly.” Jinyoung grins and Daehwi almost bursts out his feels. He opts to behave though and continue to listen to the male. “It’s just… Jihoon’s the one who made me trust people again after my childhood friend left me.”

_Childhood friend?_

“To be honest, this might seem weird, but I first thought you were my childhood friend.” Daehwi stills, obviously surprised with Jinyoung’s statement. “But I know it’s impossible since he’s gone.”

Daehwi sees Jinyoung spacing off for a bit, as if distracted but he still asks, “What do you mean he’s gone?”

Jinyoung looks back at him, stares back into Daehwi’s curious gaze for a lull minute before shaking his head with a smile. “He just disappeared without any word… but it’s okay. It’s all in the past.”

Daehwi sees Jinyoung smiling, but he knows there’s more to what his eyes can see. Braving himself with a bite of a gopchang piece, Daehwi speaks. “What if I’m really your childhood friend?” He notices Jinyoung’s eyes flicker in interest, so he continues, “Just kidding though since that’s impossible. I’m not even sure…”

“What do you mean you’re not sure?”

“It’s just… I saw a polaroid photo of my younger self together with another kid. The picture is kind of blurry so I can’t distinguish the kid’s face.” Daehwi purses his lips in thought and claps his hands when he remembers something. “Ah, ‘0001’ was written on it but I don’t know what 0001 stands for—wait,” Daehwi gasps. “If you combine our birth years, it will be 0001!”

Jinyoung looks stunned and looks as if he’s very lost. “That’s… that’s...”

Daehwi realizes this as his cue to stop.

“Well, it might just be a coincidence!” Daehwi forces a laughter, trying to bring up the atmosphere again. “I wouldn’t really know since I can’t remember anything before I got into high school.”

“What do you mean you can’t remember?”

Daehwi, despite unsure if he should be talking about these things or not, ignores the gnawing thought in his head and explains to Jinyoung.

Jinyoung only looks at him and stares idly for a while after he speaks. When Jinyoung doesn’t respond, Daehwi begins berating himself mentally. “But I’m okay now, don’t worry!” Daehwi reassures Jinyoung (and also himself that he’s not endangering their progress), but the unfathomable countenance of the male does little to no reassurance for his part. “You know what, I think I may have that photo in my wallet—“

But before he can even realize what’s happening, Daehwi feels his heart pounding, throbbing violently against his chest. He loses control over his hands, both affixed and frozen on the table in shock and in an attempt to control himself. He loses the feeling on his cheeks, and only feels it becoming warm and most likely lighting up in bright red.

And his lips become ablaze, burning and trembling with each stroke that Jinyoung does to it with his thumb.

“Sorry, what was that?” Jinyoung asks, removing the dirt just right along the edge of Daehwi’s lips. “There was something on your lips so I just—“

“Oh no, no, it’s fine! Hah,” Daehwi’s voice is loud, completely forgetting about everything else as he unconsciously tries to drown out the noise of his heart. “S-sorry, I am such a handful—“

“It’s okay,” Jinyoung smiles as he places a wrapped piece of gopchang on Daehwi’s plate. “It’s adorable.”

Jinyoung chuckles, lips formed into a beautiful curve as his eyes twinkle in delight. Daehwi hears him, sees him, and feels nothing but him, and he suddenly understands that he’s already caught, trapped with no way out.

Maybe it had been that way since the beginning.

It had only been a month since they first met, a month since Daehwi first found Jinyoung, but even then, the moment that Daehwi looked at Jinyoung, he knows that he likes him because he was his Adonis.

He _liked_ him for being his Adonis.

But now it’s different. In the span of time that Daehwi got to know him better, of experiencing his character and not just by seeing him, Daehwi fell even more.

With each passing day, he began to fall more, not to Adonis anymore, but to Jinyoung himself. And before he can even realize it, he’s already fallen in far too deep.

But Daehwi, despite being the innocent casualty, loves it just as much as he loves him.

 

 

 


	6. Spring Breeze

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \- Plan LTE is finally put into action!  
> \- Jinyoung is still confused and needs meditation  
> \- But Daehwi still hasn't gotten over Jinyoung's adorable(?) look of constipation  
> \- And author probably needs divine intervention

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is supposed to be posted for Daehwi's bday, but I reckoned I will be bashed if I did.  
> Even if I'm only posting it now HAH, Ily readers.
> 
> Anyway, belated happy birthday to my sunshine, Lee Daehwi!  
> Always be bright and happy!
> 
> xoxo
> 
> PS: donut kill me pls thanks

Spring Breeze

* * *

 

 

Jinyoung isn’t a fan of English literature (or any literature for that matter) but any kind of movies piques his interest. He loves watching movies; he loves going to the theaters. Literally, he and Jihoon go to the movies at least once a month when they were still in high school (Jihoon and him really had to save up money for their monthly tradition since both of them were just broke high school students).

So it comes as a surprise (well, not really but he doesn’t want to admit it yet) of how just getting food for the movies is already giving him the heebie-jeebies.

“So what flavor do you want, hyung?”

“Coke.”

“Coke?

“Yeah—“ Jinyoung stops when he hears Daehwi laughing. “Wait, what?”

“I asked you what flavor you want,” Daehwi titters. “For the popcorn, that is.”

Jinyoung sees the cashier squeezing his mouth into a thin line, presumably trying to control the urge to laugh and in an instant, he feels his ears becoming warm. “I—uh, whichever you want is fine with me.” He then points to the ticket booth. “I’ll go buy our tickets, yeah.”

“We can buy them together—“

Jinyoung doesn’t hear the rest of his words as he immediately dashes to the ticketing booth. He knows that he could be kind of dumb sometimes ( _most_ of the time) but he just had to get away from the scene and get his mind out of the gutter. Even if it is just mere minutes of solace, he would take it for he really needed to clear out his mind.

After hearing Daehwi’s story, there’s a thought that continued to linger in his head – an impossible thought that is becoming more and more possible with each passing second. The first time he saw Daehwi, he already recognized his face; the same face he had etched in his mind and heart for so long in hopes of meeting him again. But his name is a different one so he disregarded all initial assumptions that he had.

Jinyoung already ignored it, how every time he looks at Daehwi, he can see _him_ , yet the thought and theory just keeps coming back. The possibility that Daehwi might be indeed who he was looking for just keeps getting realer each day.

And it doesn’t help the fact that as the days pass by, as he gets to spend more time with Daehwi, there’s another unrelenting feeling inside him, another emotion akin to affection that keeps on growing into something more. It was weird since Daehwi is just his dorm mate and his classmate. Daehwi is just his friend yet the honest and candid part of him tells him that he is more than just that and the affection he feels for the boy isn’t limited to just mere friendship.

Jinyoung, despite being a recluse person, isn’t new to such feelings. In spite of the fact that he has a special skill of undeterred display of folly, Jinyoung knows very well what the confusing feelings appearing in his heart mean.

It shouldn’t be that way for he had experienced it once with _him_ and the second with another.

And he can’t experience it for the third time, especially when it’s very much like the first.

More so since the second is not even done.

_Are you this easily fazed, Jinyoung?_

Jinyoung chooses to push all thoughts aside when he sees Daehwi approaching, one bucket of popcorn in his left hand and a tall tumbler of what he assumes to be soda in the other. Despite finding it peculiar how there’s only one tumbler, he immediately grabs the soda from Daehwi, realizing that the latter had been trying to pick the popcorn using his mouth. “There, eat properly, silly.”

“Thenkshf!”

Jinyoung snorts.

_Cute._

But then he bites his lips and immediately berates himself for almost saying it out loud (not that it matters if he did, but he’d like to believe that it really does). “Uhm, so should we sit at the upper seats or…?”

Daehwi shrugs in response. “It doesn’t really matter but be quick since the movie’s almost starting!”

Jinyoung should’ve actually bought the tickets earlier but since he had been too busy sorting out his very confused and chaotic thoughts, he had almost forgotten about it. Fortunately, Daehwi isn’t really picky. There isn’t a lot of movie goers too so he was able to pick the seat in the higher levels – where he usually sits.

Both Daehwi and Jinyoung make haste for the theaters and just exactly as they reached inside, the movie starts. Jinyoung walks ahead of Daehwi and turns on the flash of his phone to light the latter’s way. Daehwi smiles in gratitude, and leans in close to his ear when they reach their seats. “Thanks.” Daehwi whispers and Jinyoung almost chokes, feeling the latter’s breath ghosting over his ear.

The theater is cold but his ears feel warm. In an attempt to cool himself down, Jinyoung grabs the soda but flinches when he feels another hand on his. He looks at Daehwi and sees him looking back with his big beady eyes. “Sorry, go ahead!” Daehwi tells him but he shakes his head.

“Oh no, you first!” Jinyoung retorts. Fortunately, Daehwi isn’t stubborn and takes the soda from him. He takes a few sips from the soda and hands it to Jinyoung before turning back to the movie (which Jinyoung had apparently forgotten already, of course).

And that’s when everything starts to go haywire.

Jinyoung stares at the straw, sees how the top end has a bit of soda beads. _Of course it would have, you dumb fool._ He contemplates, side eyeing his seatmate who, unlike him, is doing a good job of actually watching the movie like how they are supposed to. Knowing this, Jinyoung was about to take a sip himself but stops just an inch away from the straw.

_Indirect kiss._

Jinyoung slowly places the soda back to the holder, unaware that Daehwi’s watching him. “What’s wrong?”

“Uh, I—“ Jinyoung stresses, suddenly finding the words stuck in his throat. “Maybe I should get another soda, huh.” he laughs nervously, seeing Daehwi’s raised eyebrow. “I-I mean, you know… it might not be enough for us two? Yeah, that’s—it’s too little.”

Daehwi looks at him and while it is indeed dark inside the theater, Jinyoung doesn’t miss how the younger’s eyebrows scrunch. “But that’s a jumbo size?” Daehwi simply asks, but not a minute later, Jinyoung immediately regrets being an individual who lacks a whole lot of eloquence.

“Don’t tell me… you’re conscious of drinking from the soda because you think it’ll be an indirect kiss?”

Jinyoung almost chokes, having goosebumps from the very on point comment of Daehwi, and he begins to question himself and his so called subtlety – or lack thereof.

“W-what?!” Jinyoung says a tad too loud, catching the attention of the nearby audience. He immediately ducks his head down to hide, frowning a bit when Daehwi does the same and covers his mouth in an effort to drown out his laughter. “Don’t laugh, this is your fault…!”

“But you’re so funny,” Daehwi giggles. “I’m not even doing anything yet here you are being so conscious and overthinking everything. Really hyung, I’m going to start thinking differently if you continue being like this.” Daehwi jokes but Jinyoung knows better than to take his words as just as a mere joke.

So he dismisses the nagging thought inside his head. Daehwi’s right anyway. They’re friends and friends always share their food. Heck, they always eat together so what’s wrong with sharing a soda?

 _It’s wrong if you put malice on it_ (which is exactly what Jinyoung’s disturbed mind is doing).

Once the coast is clear, Daehwi and Jinyoung sit properly again. Jinyoung looks at the soda one more time before finally deciding that he isn’t thirsty.

“Aren’t you going to drink?”

Jinyoung shakes his head and instead, grabs a handful of popcorn. “I’m not thirsty… yet.” He then stuffs himself as Daehwi just chuckles.

Fortunately, the trick worked and he’s able to momentarily forget his internal struggles.

Not for the physical ones though.

Stuffing himself with the popcorn only made him thirstier. It did help him to finally do what he was supposed to do however – to focus on the movie. There are times that he would be conscious, when he and Daehwi would get popcorn from the bucket situated in between them at the same time, but it wasn’t something that completely unnerved him. He still had a good gist of the movie nonetheless, and he already has a rough idea of how he’s going to accurately write (botch) his part of the reaction paper anyway.

If any, he had already read the book before so the movie is just an additional info to him.

_Well at least I can narrate how Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy botched their ways into each other._

Jinyoung is about to get more popcorn despite his throat becoming extremely parched (because he ain’t about to admit that he’s very much thirsty after enduring it for so long) but halts when he notices Daehwi fidgeting in his seat. He side eyes him a bit and observes his movement, gathering that the boy is shivering in coldness.

If Jinyoung thinks about it, the theater they are in is indeed a tad too cold than the norm. He has his gray cardigan on so he couldn’t really feel it as much. Daehwi, on the contrary, is only wearing a thin tee. Not to mention how stick thin he is, Jinyoung’s so sure that there’s not enough fat in the boy’s body to keep up with the temperature.

And being the thoughtful and gentleman he believes himself to be, Jinyoung removes his cardigan and wraps it around Daehwi’s back. The latter looks at him with wide eyes and asks, “W-what are you doing?”

“You’ve been shivering since earlier. Well, it _is_ pretty cold in this theater.” Jinyoung says as he helps Daehwi wear his clothing. He then looks at Daehwi’s shirt and shakes his head. “I’m already wearing a knitted sweater and even I still feel cold. How much more for you who’s only wearing that very thin shirt?”

“Well, I didn’t expect it to be _that_ cold…” Daehwi frowns.

“From now on, always bring a jacket when you go to the movies, okay?” Jinyoung scolds Daehwi, but the latter only nods with a grin.

Jinyoung then tries to watch the movie again, but it was futile for about five minutes later, he doesn’t feel anything in the bucket anymore. Realizing that he had finished all of the popcorn, he suddenly remembers the parchedness of his throat and almost too suddenly does he feel the itch in it.

He contemplates (yet again) in drinking from their shared soda, but stops once he sees Daehwi squirming (another yet again) in his seat.

 _Maybe I should feed him more so he can put on more weight—_ Jinyoung stills as he suddenly thinks up of an idea.

And that’s when things start to get worse.

“I’m going to get more popcorn and maybe a hot tea for you,” Jinyoung says but Daehwi doesn’t respond and instead, is still focused on the movie. Realizing that the boy didn’t hear him, Jinyoung leans in close to Daehwi and calls him, “Daehwi, do you—“ Upon hearing his name, Daehwi instinctively turns his head, only to end up hitting Jinyoung’s face.

Or to be exact, Jinyoung’s lips lands on Daehwi’s.

Or to be _very_ exact, Jinyoung’s lips lands on _half_ of Daehwi’s lips.

It happens only for a split second before Jinyoung immediately backs away, eyes wide in surprise, mirroring Daehwi’s countenance.

And Jinyoung feels dizzy, eyes flickering back and forth at anything but Daehwi. His heart’s hammering and threatening to burst out from his chest at the sudden unexpected contact; his mind’s turning void, suddenly going blank and unable to process any form of thought at all. “I—“ he tries to speak, but no words come out as if he’s incapable of forming any coherent sentences.

“Sure, yeah.”

Jinyoung sees Daehwi’s small smile, sees how his eyes had returned to their normal size and any trace of shock nor surprise were nowhere to be found. Thus, he begins to doubt himself, if what happened really did happen or if it was just a product of his unstable mind (since it isn’t exactly impossible).

Jinyoung just reluctantly nods as he stands up from his seat and dashes towards the exit. Once he’s outside, he dashes to the drinking fountain and takes a few sips to quench his parched throat. He breathes in and out after, in an attempt to calm down the furious irregularity of his heart, but it was futile, especially since the feeling on his lips still lingers, giving him a strangely hot and fuzzy sensation from within.

And only then does it dawn to him that it was true. Even if it wasn’t totally a proper one, it really did happen.

_I just kissed Daehwi. Oh fuck._

Despite the ongoing onslaught in his heart by various forces of the unknown, Jinyoung doesn’t forget to get hot tea for Daehwi. He does forget the popcorn however, too focused in putting the right mixture of sugar and milk in the drink (since Daehwi’s drinking it).

Daehwi doesn’t realize that he didn’t have popcorn however, as he only receives the hot tea with a smile. “Thanks, hyung.” He sips on the tea and sighs in relief.

Jinyoung just nods before going back to his seat and doesn’t speak for the duration of the whole movie. Never let it be said though that he would completely forget about what actually happened, as it is safe to say that his eyes are everywhere but the movie itself. The sounds from the movie become fine buzz against his ears and he only hears the still hyper beating of his heart. It had calmed down to an extent compared to how it was earlier, but it still is enough to keep him on the edge.

Especially since for some reason, Daehwi is still the same.

Even as the movie ended (Jinyoung didn’t even realize until the lights went back on), Daehwi stretched his arms just like the usual, and turned to Jinyoung with a grin. “Well, that was lovely.” He then stands up. “Come on, let’s go?”

Jinyoung obliges and follows after him, various questions rushing to him incessantly.  

_Why is he acting like nothing happened? Did it really not happen? Did he not feel it?_

_Am I the only one affected by this?_

Jinyoung follows after Daehwi who just walks casually out of the theater. The boy throws the soda tumbler and cup of tea to the trash before turning back to Jinyoung. “Should we go home now?”

Jinyoung felt so suffocated. He wanted to ask Daehwi if it was real or if it was just him. He wanted to ask how he felt, to apologize for not knowing why he’s feeling so, so much, but the lax smile on the boy’s face keeps him from doing so.

“Not yet, please Daehwi...” Jinyoung stops on his tracks and grabs Daehwi’s hand. “I—“

But when he does decide to do so, fate still finds a way to obstruct him.

“Jinyoung? Daehwi?”

And Jinyoung lets go of Daehwi’s hand.

 

* * *

 

Daehwi didn’t want to say anything about it, but after eating lunch at the gopchang place near their dorm, Jinyoung has been acting rather weird. Well, if he thinks about it, Jinyoung had always been the passive type and is usually silent in contrast to the loud and active nature of Daehwi. But today, he isn’t just quiet. He seems rather fidgety as well, as if he had a lot of things going on in his head.

“So what flavor do you want, hyung?”

“Coke.”

“Coke?

“Yeah—“ Daehwi laughs, distracting Jinyoung. “Wait, what?”

“I asked you what flavor you want—for the popcorn, that is.”

It was hard not to notice since who the hell orders coke flavor for popcorn?

Daehwi doesn’t get to tease Jinyoung more about it though since before he can even do so, Jinyoung tells him that he’s going to buy their tickets. Daehwi wanted to tell him that they can also buy their tickets together with the popcorn, but he just acquiesces and lets the male be. He reckons that Jinyoung wants to take a breather from the place, especially having been embarrassed by the cashier who heard their whole exchange.

“Are you perhaps on a date?” the cashier asks casually, punching in Daehwi’s payment before handing him their food. “If yes, then good luck. That young man seems to be really nervous.”

“Thanks but don’t worry, I got him.” Daehwi smiles and bows a bit at the cashier before eventually following after Jinyoung.

He bought a cheese flavored popcorn and one big tumbler of soda as their snack as a part of his plan LTE (Plan LTE: seduce Jinyoung in the fastest way possible) since the plan is already a go. Woojin tried to warn him about it, of how things doesn’t work like that, but he isn’t as dense as he looks like. Daehwi can feel it, the spark between him and Jinyoung. He isn’t sure but he has a strong gut feeling that Jinyoung might be interested in him too, if his peculiar body language whenever Daehwi is around – the random blushes and cute jumps – is anything to go by.

So he makes sure to go along with the proper steps of his plan LTE. First is to get just one soda for the both of them and of course, with just one straw to use as well. It won’t be a big deal since they are “bros” anyway and as “bros”, it would only be normal to share food and drinks. Jinyoung didn’t say anything anyway, when he took the soda from Daehwi, and even reprimanded him to eat properly.

Unless Jinyoung himself is conscious of Daehwi, then that’s a different matter.

Which is apparently the case – or as what Daehwi would like to believe.

After getting the tickets from the ticketing booth, Daehwi and Jinyoung immediately rushed to the theater since the movie already started. It was dark inside, but being the very thoughtful and kind gentleman that he is, Jinyoung moves ahead of him and opens his phone’s flash so that Daehwi can properly see in the dark as they make their way up to their seats (Jinyoung chose the seats on the upper part so it was quite a journey for Daehwi, being that he couldn’t really see clearly in the dark).

Daehwi has to admit that while it was such a simple gesture, it made his heart skip a beat or two that he couldn’t help but lean in towards Jinyoung to say his gratitude. It was dark but Daehwi doesn’t fail to see the surprise shown on Jinyoung’s face when he whispered. _He is so darn cute._

The two of them settle in their seats for a while as the movie plays. Daehwi occasionally munches on the popcorn but stops when he sees Jinyoung motioning for the soda.

_It’s time._

Just as Jinyoung holds the tumbler, Daehwi goes in for the kill.

Or just him grabbing Jinyoung’s hand to be precise.

But of course, Daehwi makes sure to keep his pride intact. “Sorry, go ahead!” he tells Jinyoung, letting go immediately of his hand.

Jinyoung, on the other hand, shakes his head furiously. “Oh no, you first!”

Daehwi was about to retort again, but he assumes it wouldn’t be so bad if he were to drink it first. It would feel like Jinyoung’s indirectly kissing him that way, and just the thought of it is enough to send him into a furious overdrive of feels.

So he takes a sip on the soda for a bit, making sure to pucker up his lips. He puts it back a couple of seconds later and waits for Jinyoung to take it, yet minutes pass and the tumbler remains situated in the holder.

“What’s wrong?”

“Uh, I—maybe I should get another soda, huh.” Jinyoung laughs nervously. “I-I mean, you know… it might not be enough for us two? Yeah, that’s—it’s too little.”

Daehwi sees Jinyoung staring at the soda, his countenance akin to that of constipation once again.

Yet to Daehwi, it’s just another one of his many adorable faces that he had come to love and he can’t help but giggle, an idea coming up to him.

“Don’t tell me… you’re conscious of drinking from the soda because you think it’ll be an indirect kiss?”

Jinyoung coughs all too suddenly and he exclaims, “W-what?!” His voice catches the attention of the moviegoers nearby and he instinctively ducks his head down. Daehwi follows suit, trying his best to contain his laughter. Jinyoung scrunches his eyebrows. “Don’t laugh, this is your fault…!”

“But you’re so funny,” Daehwi laughs quietly. “I’m not even doing anything yet here you are being so conscious and overthinking everything.” He sighs and shakes his head playfully. “Really hyung, I’m going to start thinking differently if you continue being like this.” Daehwi jokes, internally giggling at how stunned and taken aback Jinyoung looked.

When the attention on them is gone, the two of them go back to their original positions.

“Aren’t you going to drink?”

“I’m not thirsty… yet.”

Daehwi just nods and watches as Jinyoung suddenly start filling himself with the popcorn, and he takes this as a chance to move on with his second tactic (being that his first one didn’t really go well), by occasionally grabbing popcorn at the same time as the male. It was an effort, being that he always had to have the right timing (yes, Daehwi admits that he really waits until Jinyoung grabs some before he does too) but Daehwi knows that physical contact is the best form of seduction. Not that he has many experience in dating, but that he can at least validate, as he himself feels his skin burn whenever the back of their palms touch.

Maybe it was only for him. Maybe it was for the both of them. Daehwi can’t really be sure but he definitely feels it.

The spark between them two.

And as far as the spark goes to his soul, it isn’t quite enough for his body. Daehwi, in his best and utmost effort to try and watch the movie for real, still fails as his focus suddenly gets diverted to the coldness of the theater. He shivers, unable to keep still as he feels the coolness of the air surrounding his skin and even curses mentally for prioritizing style over his health, but he can’t do anything about it now. It doesn’t matter if he can’t focus on the movie anyway. He had watched the movie before, had read the book prior to the movie’s production so there wasn’t really a need for him to rewatch it.

Yet Daehwi wouldn’t be Daehwi if he would pass such a golden opportunity to go on a date with his Adonis and have him all to himself.

Especially not when his Adonis never fails to be his usual gentlemanly self, making Daehwi’s insides melt.

“W-what are you doing?” Daehwi mumbles, surprise written all over his face as he feels the soft texture of the cardigan over his shoulders.

“You’ve been shivering since earlier. Well, it _is_ pretty cold in this theater.” Jinyoung comments as he holds the cardigan so Daehwi can wear it with ease. Despite the reluctance, Daehwi obediently follows. “I’m already wearing a knitted sweater and even I still feel cold. How much more for you who’s only wearing that very thin shirt?”

Daehwi, in his very small sheepish voice, says, “Well, I didn’t expect it to be _that_ cold…” he frowns.

“From now on, always bring a jacket when you go to the movies, okay?”

_Or I can just wear yours again?_

Daehwi nods and puts on a grin, dismissing the thoughts that his mind is conjuring.

The two of them go back to the movie (which might as well be forgotten already with how much they had missed due to talking) and try to focus yet again. This time though, Daehwi doesn’t blatantly watch Jinyoung anymore. He tries to stay still in his seat to keep his thoughts from going astray again, yet the woodsy cotton and musk scent of the cardigan hinders him from doing so, rendering him restless and uneasy.

_He’d only been thinking about my welfare yet I only kept on thinking about how to cheaply flirt with him._

Jinyoung only thought of how he could take care of Daehwi and he, in turn only thought of how he could take advantage of it. And Daehwi suddenly feels ashamed, of how his and Jinyoung’s characters greatly contrast, of how insincere he’s acting.

_Woojin-hyung’s right. Plan LTE is wrong. Things don’t work like that._

Daehwi breathes in deeply and tries to calm his head. Their date isn’t done yet anyway, so instead of beating himself about how he acted, he opts to change routes. However, fate isn’t something one can easily change, and of course, the unexpected happens.

“Daehwi, do you—“

Upon hearing his name, Daehwi instinctively turns his head and feels warmth spreading across his skin. He feels a hot breath ghosting over his cheek; he feels a moist and plump sensation on his lips.

In a blink of an eye, Daehwi sees Jinyoung staring back at him with the same stunned expression and his mind goes blank, unable to comprehend what had caused his heart to suddenly start beating vehemently.

“I—“

“Yeah, sure.”

Daehwi’s mind goes into panic mode and just does what he thinks is the safest option: to deflect and ignore the situation.

Jinyoung opens his mouth in what looks like an attempt to speak, but he closes it a lull second after and just nods before proceeding to exit the theater.

Once Jinyoung is out of sight for some reason Daehwi doesn’t know, he screams a very short, “AH!” and immediately ducks his head down behind the seats, clamping his lips with both hands. All red lights flash off in his mind as he try to remember what happened.

_I was thinking about the cardigan, and then Jinyoung-hyung called me, and then I looked back at him and then… and then—_

Daehwi stomps his feet on the floor, screaming internally at the top of his head once he finally realize that he and Jinyoung just kissed – half kissed.

And while he should be happy that his failed attempt at an indirect kiss made way for a real (accidental) kiss, Daehwi’s only bothered and in distress for he isn’t exactly sure whether it was real or just another episode from his very imaginative fantasy. It happened all too fast, all too sudden, that Daehwi’s even questioning if his memory or vision was indeed right.

The fact that his dumbness acted again by choosing to act unfazed (he didn’t even know what Jinyoung said earlier) doesn’t help either.

_What the fuck is wrong with you Lee Daehwi!_

Jinyoung took quite a bit of time before he came back with a hot milk tea which he immediately gives to Daehwi. Daehwi’s clueless why Jinyoung got him tea, but he receives it with gratitude nonetheless, and lets the hot beverage calm him down.

It isn’t enough albeit, as for the rest of the movie, all he could feel and hear were the loud and frantic fits in his chest which never seemed to calm down. Even as the movie finally ended, Daehwi himself still couldn’t sort out his thoughts, and ends up saying a nonchalant comment. “Well, that was lovely.” He says in the most impassive tone, obviously uncaring as he stretches his arms. He stands up right after and grins at Jinyoung. “Come on, let’s go?”

Daehwi immediately walks out of the theater, wanting to breathe fresh air in hopes that it will help clear his mind. He then throws the soda tumbler and tea cup in the trash before turning to Jinyoung to ask, “Should we go home now?”

Daehwi sees the hesitation on Jinyoung’s face, and he himself almost regrets asking his question. He didn’t really want to go home yet; he wanted to be with Jinyoung more, just as much as the latter seemed like he does. However, the more that he keeps up the act of being unaware, it’ll only be harder for him to stop himself from confronting the male of what actually happened.

And despite wanting to actually do it, he’s reluctant. Daehwi isn’t usually fazed by such matters, but Jinyoung is the one involved.

And he wouldn’t want to risk what they have now, not when he isn’t even sure of what really happened.

Not when he had already realized his real feelings.

Not when he’s finally willing to confess everything.

Daehwi wanted to clear his thoughts first and make a concrete plan of how to handle the situation. It isn’t something that can easily be sorted out. He needs to be sure, to be precise.

He needs everything to be perfect, so when he finally divulges his heart, everything will be worth it.

“Not yet,”

But Jinyoung grabs his hand, looks at him with a flushed and anxious countenance that could only mean one thing.

_Jinyoung is affected just as much._

“Please Daehwi…”

And his assumption is indeed correct. It did happen.

Daehwi suddenly feels himself smiling again.

“I—“

“Jinyoung? Daehwi?”

Both Daehwi and Jinyoung turn towards the owner of the voice only to see Jihoon and Woojin walking towards them. Daehwi’s eyebrows scrunch in a mixture of surprise and confusion. Surprise since as far as he know, Woojin’s indeed going to watch the movie with Jihoon, but he wasn’t aware that they were going to the same theatre – much less at the same screening time.

Confusion since the moment he looks at Woojin, the male’s face pales beyond comparison as if seemingly distraught.

“Woojin-hyung, you didn’t tell me you and Jihoon-sunbae will watch here?” Daehwi asks as Woojin walks up to his side.

“Jinyoung didn’t tell me anything either!” Jihoon tells him. “It sure is a coincidence, huh.”

Daehwi agrees with a nod but halts when he hears Woojin whisper, “Daehwi, we need to go.” Daehwi then sees the confusion in Jinyoung’s face and he remembers how he haven’t introduced the male yet.  “Jinyoung’s—“

“Woojin-hyung?” But Jinyoung suddenly asks, surprising Daehwi. “You know Woojin-sunbae?”

Daehwi ignores Woojin’s silent hiss and looks back at Jinyoung with a smile. “Woojin-hyung’s my cousin.”

Jinyoung’s eyes widen for a fleeting moment before he mumbles, “That is—nobody told me that.”

“Daehwi, we need to go,” Woojin whispers again.

“Well, to my defense, it was only recently that I found out about it too.” Jihoon suddenly chimes in, shrugging right beside Jinyoung. “I didn’t even know that Daehwi and Woojin knew each other before!” Jihoon chuckles but stops a moment later when his eyes land on Daehwi’s outfit.

“Is that Jinyoung’s?”

Daehwi looks back at Jihoon in confusion but nods nonetheless, all the while ignoring Woojin’s attempt of distracting him. The male had been pulling his shirt the moment they arrived, as if he was in such a hurry yet Daehwi doesn’t care. As much as he loves his cousin, there’s no way that he’d go now.

Not when he and Jinyoung still had something to talk about.

But when he sees Jihoon’s hands suddenly wrapping around Jinyoung’s arm, Daehwi’s eyes waver.

“Why would you let other people aside from me wear your clothes! Jihoonie is sad!”

And when Jinyoung grabs ahold of Jihoon’s hand tightly, Daehwi’s surroundings go still.

“Jihoon, it’s not that—“

“Hah, I’m just kidding.” Jihoon giggles. “I know I’m your only one,” He then holds on to Jinyoung’s arm tighter. “Right, babe?”

“W-what’s going on…” Daehwi manages to let out, meaning to ask rather than mumble.

“It’s okay, Hwi, you can use Jinyoung’s cardigan! I was just joking with this silly kid.” Jihoon says as he pokes Jinyoung’s cheek and drops the words that Daehwi had least expected.

“I’m sorry for being such a clingy boyfriend.”

Daehwi immediately looks at Jinyoung to confirm, to get any form of validation, to be sure that he isn’t being pranked and that he was just dreaming because what’s playing right in front of him is too absurd to be true.

But Jinyoung only stares back at him with a vague expression that looks almost in between of pity and pain – Daehwi couldn’t even decipher anything anymore – mouth ajar as if about to say something.

Yet he doesn’t say anything.

And when Jinyoung closes his eyes and lowers his head, Daehwi loses _everything_.

“I—it’s okay! Haha,” Daehwi says a tad too loudly before looking at his phone. “Oh, look at the time. I need to go. Sorry, I—“ he almost chokes as his eyes become glassy. “I—I’ll go ahead. Bye.”

“Daehwi!”

And even as he finally hears Jinyoung’s voice, Daehwi only runs, tears finally breaking through his face, and doesn’t look back.

 

 


	7. One Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Incoming WD & CH content. Brace your souls. 
> 
> \- Jinyoung joins the meditation club.  
> \- Daehwi wakes up from the dream that he loves.  
> \- and author's mind (if there is even any) is flying somewhere in the clouds above.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, incoming WinkDeep and ChamHwi content. 
> 
> I decided to update tonight since I enjoyed writing ch 9 so much and I wanted to post everything already, but realized I haven't finished (or started) the last chapter for that matter LOLOL  
> I might just combine CH10 and epilogue into 1 whole chapter.
> 
> Am also planning to write another long oneshot/twoshot (whatever) so hopefully I can finish this soon and start working on that one since I'm itching to start that one already
> 
> Anyway, if you do ever read this note,  
> I love you Kinder, Kim, and maaraw huehue  
> xoxo

[One Love](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eityjCcgq6g)

 

* * *

 

“Hi, are you a freshman?” A small brown haired male dressed in the same uniform as Jinyoung suddenly materializes right in front of him, eyes gleaming in sparkles while beaming. “Would you like to join our meditation club?” he asks as he hands Jinyoung a flyer.

Jinyoung looks at the piece of paper, guessing that whoever made the said advertisement probably only took five minutes to scribble and waste trees. He doesn’t linger long on the flyer though as he realizes what the stranger just said. “Wait, did you just say meditation—“

“Yeah, meditation club.”

“Uh, that—“ Jinyoung’s eyebrows scrunch. “What exactly do you do in that… club?”

“Good question!” The male chirps. He then places an arm around Jinyoung’s shoulder (with much effort at that, being that Jinyoung had to lower down a bit to match his height) and starts dragging him to somewhere unknown. “Why don’t you join our club and find out?”

If Jinyoung remembers correctly, joining the meditation club was against his will initially. But coming to the club headquarters and getting greeted by 1 single sized bed (where another taller pink haired student was currently asleep), 1 queen sized and a rather cozy loveseat immediately takes away his prejudice. Much more so when he learns that the one and only goal of the club is for its members to get their much needed rest.

“Before I fully accept you though, I will need to have your name.” the stranger also the club president – Jinyoung presumes – tells him as he takes a sit on the queen sized bed. “Not like I will take it, but I just need it like—you get what I mean.”

Jinyoung doesn’t get what he means.

“B-Bae Jinyoung.” He mumbles, a bit unsure and timid, especially being under the gaze of a senior (seniority is indeed very important to him).

“Jinyoung, that’s a nice name.” the stranger comments. “That guy sleeping there is Kang Daniel, he’s the club president,” Jinyoung corrects the information in his head as he nods. “and I’m Park Jihoon, the vice president.” He then grabs Jinyoung’s hand and shakes it. “You can be the _sexytary_ —“ Jihoon eyes Jinyoung up and down and the latter chokes.

“Calm down, Jesus.” Jihoon chuckles, patting Jinyoung’s back gently. When the latter regains himself, Jihoon grins. “Nice to meet you, Jinyoung! Welcome to the club!”

Between his doubts with his life decisions and the prospect of not having to find any other clubs that will actually require him to exert effort and energy, Jinyoung sees more pros in the latter and in the end, he seals the verbal contract with the vice president.

“Thank you, Jihoon-sunbae.”

High school is quite both a challenge and a breeze to Jinyoung. Challenge because it’s the time of his educational life that he actually needs to exert more effort in – being that university comes next. It’s also quite a breeze since everybody’s focused on their studies rather than their social lives. Meaning, he needed not to think too much about surviving as an introvert.

Or that’s what he thought until he actually meets the person who would leave a mark in his high school life up to present.

Park Jihoon.

Ahead of Jinyoung by a year. A theater actor who possesses the face of a cherub. The vice president of the meditation club. Also the first senior as well as the first high school student who Jinyoung actually befriended.

Well, if he’s being honest, Jihoon was actually the first one who befriended him.

Turns out that Jihoon and Daniel’s club is being threatened to be dissolved as the previous president already graduated, and the required minimum number of members per club is three. Luckily for them, Jinyoung just happened to pass by their club room when he got lost on his way to his class, and the rest is history.

Unlike how Jinyoung first thought of Jihoon as an active, carefree person, he’s actually the contrary. Very much like Jinyoung, Jihoon was also a recluse. Despite him being known throughout the school (together with Daniel), Jihoon wasn’t really that sociable, and only so rarely did Jinyoung see him hanging out with his other friends.

The lot of his high school days, Jihoon would always be where Jinyoung was – following him around and even going to an extent of picking him up at their room after classes. If Jinyoung’s schedule doesn’t match with his, Jihoon would be lounging around the meditation club, pestering a sleeping Daniel or playing games.

It was a wonder to Jinyoung at first, how someone as popular as Jihoon would suddenly take interest in him, but then as time passed by, he slowly understood how their personalities were fairly similar. The passive and gloomy characters of theirs greatly matched.

Jinyoung isn’t vocal and Jihoon is rather silent. Jihoon likes playing games and while Jinyoung isn’t really a gamer and much rather watch movies, they would take turns every week to do what the other person wants as their official club activity. Daniel is already out of the equation, being that he’s a sleepless third year student preparing for entrance exams (Jihoon and Jinyoung only got to play and watch a movie with him once as he would always be passed out – he is a 3rd year high school student after all).

Jinyoung thinks of this as the main reason, of why Jihoon chose to stick to him. But honestly, whatever the reason was, it didn’t really matter. Jihoon’s presence greatly comforted him during high school since Jihoon was the one who made him trust again. Jihoon was the one who saved him when he was so lost and empty.

Jihoon was the one who came when his childhood friend left.

Without asking for any in return, Jihoon just decided to put himself into Jinyoung’s life and stay with him, and Jinyoung couldn’t be more thankful. He thought that he would be okay with being by himself, afraid of letting someone in his life again. Little did he know that Jihoon coming into his life would make things better for him. Little did he know that Jihoon will soon be a constant in his life.

Little did Jinyoung know that Jihoon being a constant in his life would make way for the current of their feelings to slowly change.

“Jinyoung,”

Jihoon suddenly calls his friend, not tearing his gaze away from his phone as the two of them currently battle it out on a random multiplayer game for their club activity (last week they watched a horror movie which caused for Jihoon to put a protest on movie watching for at least a month).

“Hm?” Jinyoung hums in response, eyes also trained on his own device.

“Do you want to go out with me?”

“Where to?”

Silence.

“… I mean like, do you want to go out with me for a date?” Jihoon’s phone’s volume suddenly lowers down in comparison as he speaks. “Do you want to be… my boyfriend?”

Jinyoung’s eyes widen in realization and he accidentally makes a wrong move, causing his defeat. “Oh.” he simply says, staring as his phone display Jihoon’s name as the winner. He takes a peek at Jihoon, sees the male still focused on his phone, and answers, “… okay.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, cool.”

“Yup, cool.”

The noise of their phones slowly fade in the background and Jinyoung suddenly finds it hard to breathe.

“Jinyoung.” Jihoon calls once more and when Jinyoung turns to the call of his name on instinct, his lips meet soft and warm ones, rousing a burning sensation in the pit of his chest. It lasts for only approximately five seconds though before he sees his flushed reflection on Jihoon’s big, sparkling eyes and the latter smiles. “Okay?”

Drowning out the fast beating of his heart, Jinyoung nods.

“O-okay.”

It has been years since Jinyoung got his first kiss, yet he still can’t forget the excitement and nervousness he got from it. Excitement as it was indeed his first, and nervousness because it was a risk to take. In retrospect, Jinyoung might’ve said yes rather easily, but it wasn’t exactly the case. It was frightening, to say the least, as his heart belonged to another person back then. Albeit, the years he and Jihoon spent together slowly paved the way for his feelings to grow.

And before Jinyoung can even realize it, Jihoon had already crossed the boundaries of friendship and brotherhood, taking over the whole of his heart.

“Should I bring an extra cardigan for tomorrow?”

Jinyoung turns to his side in question and sees Jihoon slouched off on the far side of the bed, busily fiddling with his phone. They are currently in Jihoon’s dorm to rest after class. The older stops typing when he notices Jinyoung staring however, turning to give him a cynical look. “Why are you so concerned with what you should wear for tomorrow? You’re just watching a movie with Daehwi.”

Jinyoung bites his lips, taking the older’s input into consideration. And while usually he would be concerned by Jihoon’s question, instead, he replies with another one. “Why are you so preoccupied with your phone? I’m here yet all your focus is on whoever you’re texting.”

Jihoon dramatically gasps, immediately dropping his phone. “Are you perhaps… jealous?”

Contrary to how he usually blushes whenever Jihoon accuses him of such, this time, Jinyoung doesn’t. “I’m not.” he replies. “I’m okay, but you do have been getting more friends lately.”

It’s true. Upon entering college, Jihoon did get even more popular than before – which isn’t really a surprise since the male is indeed a head turner. Unlike back in high school when he didn’t really care, the Jihoon of today is much sociable, much friendlier and accommodating, broadening his connections and accepting everyone in his midst.

“Well, if you aren’t, then I am most certainly am.” Jihoon tells Jinyoung as he slowly approaches the male. “It’s just Woojin I’m texting with anyway. We’re trying to agree on a date so we can watch the movie for the same report as yours. I told you about this, didn’t I?”

Jinyoung shakes his head.

Jihoon pouts, leaning his forehead on Jinyoung’s shoulders. “Well, it’s because you don’t have time for me anymore. Lately you’re always hanging out with Daehwi.” He retorts. “I mean, I thought your childhood friend is my only rival but turns out that there’s another one…”

“That’s not…” Jinyoung trails off, words caught in his throat as he sees Jihoon staring back at him.

Jinyoung is happy with it, how Jihoon had changed, how Jihoon had opened up to other people. Yet a small part of him can’t help but want to go back in time when it was just them two. A small part of him can’t help but want to go back to the time when all he saw was Jihoon.

All he had was Jihoon. All he _wanted_ was Jihoon.

A small part of him can’t help but want to go back to the time when all of his heart belonged to Jihoon and nobody else.

“Jinyoung.”

Jinyoung snaps out of his trance as he feels Jihoon’s lips on his. It was a quick peck but Jinyoung doesn’t fail to miss how Jihoon smiles against it, pulling away with a short giggle. The older wraps his arms around Jinyoung’s waist and nuzzles his face on the latter’s chest, sighing in utter comfort.

“Don’t worry, I know you only have me.”

Jinyoung hugs Jihoon back in silence as he looks at the older’s unlocked phone.

 

So where do you want to eat dinner then? :)  
**20:12**

 

_Do you really love me or do you just love the thought of being in love?_

Jinyoung knows that time can’t be turned back. Time only keeps on moving forward.

“Oh, look at the time. I need to go. Sorry, I—I’ll go ahead. Bye.”

Much like how the feelings he had grown are slowly ceasing to exist.

“Daehwi!”

Jinyoung cries after Daehwi, but the male doesn’t look back and only continues to run.

“Sorry to cut everything off but I need to go too.” Woojin hurriedly informs both Jihoon and Jinyoung as he puts on a forced smile. “We’ll just… see each other around. Bye!” and without even letting Jihoon nor Jinyoung bid farewell, Woojin immediately pivots around and runs presumably after Daehwi.

Jinyoung wants to run, he wants to go after Daehwi and explain everything. He knows that any explanation isn’t warranted, but the look on Daehwi’s face begs to differ. The glimmer in his eyes weren’t just mere beads; his eyes were glistening in confusion, anger, and betrayal all rolled into one. Jinyoung isn’t dense and he surely isn’t oblivious since those were the same emotions he felt the moment _he_ left him.

The same equally destructive emotions that Jinyoung himself is currently feeling.

And all Jinyoung wants is to just catch up to Daehwi and hold him.

Touch him.

Hug him.

Comfort him.

Protect him from all the vicious emotions that are probably eating him from within.

“Jinyoung,”

But Jihoon’s hand stops him. Jihoon’s voice pulls him back to the present where it was just the two of them.

“Love,”

But even if it’s what he initially wanted, even if Jinyoung wished to go back in time when nobody else mattered, Jinyoung isn’t happy.

“What’s wrong?”

Jinyoung couldn’t be happy for he knew that it’s just not the same anymore.

“I—“ Jinyoung sucks in a breath as he feels Jihoon’s gentle but firm hold on his hand. “It’s nothing.”

Jihoon reluctantly nods, doubtful of Jinyoung’s words. He smiles a moment later however and asks, “Are you hungry? Should we get dinner?”

“Sorry Jihoon, but I don’t really feel good. Let’s just call it a day?”

Jihoon puts on a small smile and nods. “Okay.”

Once outside the mall, Jinyoung drops Jihoon off at the bus stop. He actually wanted to drop Jihoon off at his dorm, but the older male told him that it was fine, insisting that Jinyoung should immediately go home (which was only a few minutes walk from the mall) to rest, especially since there’s an incessant downpour looming over the gray skied city.

Jinyoung isn’t physically unwell, and he feels really bad for having to deny Jihoon of his wishes when they finally had the chance to be together after so long. But only staying with Jihoon while his mind and heart are in a complete anarchy would only be toxic for them both.

And Jihoon doesn’t deserve that.

“Drink lots of water and eat. I would insist on feeding you tonight but I think it would be better for you to just rest.” Jihoon says, rubbing his thumb against Jinyoung’s hands. “Please be a good boy and rest, okay?”

Jinyoung doesn’t deserve Jihoon.

“I love you.”

Jinyoung breathes heavily. “Jihoon, I—“ the words suspend in his mouth and his heart beats in fear, unable to say the words that he usually says.

“The bus is here!” Jihoon chirps as the bus for his route finally arrives. In a haste to not get left behind, Jihoon quickly kisses Jinyoung’s cheek before saying, “Call me when you get home, okay?”

Without uttering any other words, Jihoon enters the bus and in no less than 5 minutes does it immediately go back into the road, leaving Jinyoung all alone on the side street.

And just when the thunder strikes, and the first drop of rain falls, the realization finally dawns on him.

_“What do you mean you can’t remember?”_

_“Well… I actually got into an accident when I was in middle school. My mom told me that I was supposed to go on a trip with a friend but just right when I got out of the house, I got hit and ran over by a car. I don’t know about the other details after, since we moved to California the next month without anybody knowing so I can be treated better. They said it was pretty severe, but I’m lucky since I still survived. I lost my memories though… but it’s not like something I can’t live without.”_

_“Sometimes, I still do wonder though, who and where the friend I was supposed to meet up with is. I hope he didn’t take a grudge that I wasn’t able to meet up with him back then, since I would love to meet him again.”_

Jinyoung walks back home under the pouring rain, uncaring and unbothered by how it had made his entire body soaked and drenched. It was better actually, for at least the tears that continued to flow endlessly on his face were masked by the downpour of the sky which seemed to mirror the turmoil in his heart.

_Why do I have to find you only now when I already have someone else?_

He knows it. Jinyoung knows it, how deep inside he had already been harboring, nurturing the same emotions that he had as when they were still in middle school. Ever since the first moment he saw _him_ , he already felt it for it had always been there. It had always been kept. Jinyoung tried to ignore it, for the sake of the present, for the sake of what he has now – of _who_ he has now – but it never really disappeared.

Even as he had tried to deny it, Jinyoung still feels it. Even as he had tried to hide it, Jinyoung still remembers it.

Yet it isn’t as easy as before. It isn’t easy as one, two, three.

For he has Jihoon. Jinyoung already has Jihoon.

And feelings can’t just be thrown so easily, even as he knows that it’s not working anymore.

Jinyoung couldn’t do anything but cry, swallowed by the fear of the unknown. Of not knowing which is right or wrong. He doesn’t want to hurt Jihoon, yet the more that he stays, the more that he’s only lying to himself.

The longer that he denies himself of what he truly feels, the longer he’ll be in pain.

Not only him but also the one who he had loved.

_And continued to love all this time._

Because at the end of the day, when he closes his eyes and think of Jihoon, even as he tries to relive every bit of happy memory that they shared, it still fades and all Jinyoung can see is _him_.

All he wants is _him_.

All he yearns for is _him_.

_“Jinyoung-hyung!”_

And nobody else.

 

* * *

 

Daehwi runs. He runs and runs and runs.

He doesn’t care if Jinyoung called him, or if Woojin’s following after him. All he knows is at that moment, he just have to run and leave the scene. It was too much to handle, too much to take in.

He knows that Jinyoung and Jihoon are good friends, but he didn’t really expect them to be more than that since Jinyoung has been giving him signals. Always making dinner for him, going home with him, and just taking care of him in general, Jinyoung had been nothing but a pure sweet heart to him. Not to mention how he had always blushed whenever Daehwi would so much as try his feeble attempts at flirting, or how he had always seemed so interested and curious about Daehwi’s life.

Everything spelled green light to Daehwi, the way Jinyoung acted and the way he spoke. Jinyoung seemed as if he reciprocates Daehwi’s feelings too.

Granted that there was no verbal proof, nor can he read minds.

But actions speak louder than words.

While words can lie, actions can’t.

_Unless I’m the one who had been reading everything wrong…_

“Daehwi!”

Loud footsteps rush towards him, startling even the passersby who had been eyeing Daehwi in worry. He doesn’t know where his feet take him, uncaring at all even as the skies grumbled, signaling an incoming storm. He doesn’t react nonetheless, and only lets the tears stain his face incessantly.

“Daehwi, please, I—“

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Daehwi asks, turning to Woojin with reddish eyes. “Why the hell did you not tell me that you know him?!” Daehwi snaps, indifferent to the stares that he and Woojin were receiving. “Why did you not tell me that he’s Jihoon-sunbae’s boyfriend?!”

“Hwi, I didn’t know that Jinyoung was the one you were talking about all this time!” Woojin retorts, equally as devastated as his cousin. “It’s true, I’ve known Jinyoung since last year. He always went here to visit Jihoon when he was still in high school, but I swear I didn’t have a clue that you two know each other. Jihoon didn’t tell me anything either.” Woojin explains. “I didn’t know that you two met each other before. He didn’t know that we were cousins until now as well. Everything was just… so messed up.” Woojin sighs in defeat. “Nobody knew anything, Hwi.”

Daehwi closes his eyes, unwilling to accept how everything’s turning out. It was only a month ago when his days had turned brighter by meeting Jinyoung. Days ago when they have been almost together every day and getting closer. An hour ago when he realized his feelings, and felt Jinyoung’s lips on his. Minutes ago when Jinyoung stopped him, seeming as if he was about to confess.

Yet it’s only now that he realizes that he misunderstood everything. It’s only now that he realizes that everything is just a dream.

And as much as he’d want to continue dreaming, he understands that there isn’t any story to begin with.

Because ever since the start, Jinyoung had always belonged to someone else.

“Hyung, I-I—“ Daehwi’s voice cracks, and Woojin doesn’t wait before he engulfs his cousin into a tight hug. “I’m s-sorry, hyung… I just… I just love him—“ Daehwi cries on Woojin’s shoulder. “And it hurts so, so much…!” Daehwi sobs loudly and lets Woojin hold him, incessant tears falling as he finally wakes up from his dream.

 

-

 

“Are you sure you want to go back?” Woojin asks, idling by the door and stopping Daehwi one last time. “I mean, you can just stay here. That’s what I keep on telling you—“

“Hyung, please,” Daehwi simply smiles at him. “I’m okay.”

“Daehwi, actually, I—“ Daehwi looks at Woojin in question, his swollen eyes bare and very apparent without his sunglasses. Seeing this, Woojin shakes his head and doesn’t say anything else. When Daehwi deems it the end of their discussion, he continues to walk out of the building, sunglasses hiding the aftermath of a night of endless crying.

After the episode they had yesterday at the mall, Woojin let Daehwi spend the night at his dorm room. Declining wasn’t even a choice for Daehwi, since it was what he needed – Woojin’s warm hugs. Woojin may be a dork and can be really dumb at times but when Daehwi needs a source of comfort, he need not to ask as the former would already be by his doorstep before he can even utter a word.

And he feels guilty for Woojin actually, for blaming him when he didn’t even do anything wrong. If any, Woojin was hurt too, even longer than Daehwi at that. Daehwi could only imagine how much it is for him. Woojin actually managing to endure that kind of pain for a whole year lets Daehwi ponder, and it gives him a sense of thought. Crying himself to sleep gave him a better understanding of the real situation and a clearer perception of what action to actually take.

_Keep your feelings and just accept that you can only be friends._

Daehwi sighs, entering his dorm room after a couple of minute walk. He changes quickly into a fresh pair of clothes and readies all of his materials for class. Once he deemed himself ready for school, Daehwi checks his reflection in the mirror one last time and sees his puffy and swollen eyes still very apparent. Instead of hovering over it however, he exchanges his sunglasses with that of his usual specs. Granted, it does little to no help to hide his puffy eyes, but they were too swollen for him to use contacts and he isn’t about to go to class with sunglasses on. The last thing he would want is to attract unwanted attention and be forced to do social interaction.

Daehwi could’ve actually easily went to class straight from Woojin’s dorm, but he realized he didn’t have any stuff for class so he really has to go back. Not to mention the fact that the agreement between him and Jinyoung still stays – of him waking up the older every morning for their class – Daehwi couldn’t possibly just abandon him because he’s hurt.

If any, Jinyoung most likely doesn’t even have any idea of what’s going on.

Besides, he volunteered to wake up the male anyway, and waking him up is what Daehwi does.

Even if he knows that seeing him after what happened will surely hurt more.

Daehwi grabs the paper bag holding the cardigan that was lent to him the day prior and slowly exit his room. He drags his feet towards the door next to him and breathes in the longest and heaviest sigh as he knocks.

_Control your face, Daehwi. Act like usual._

When nobody answers, Daehwi tries to knock again yet five minutes pass and he only gets silence in return. He tries to call Jinyoung’s phone but he’s only greeted by the network operator telling him that the service is unavailable.

Daehwi finds it weird, since it’s the first time that it happened and never did Jinyoung turn his phone off. Albeit, he doesn’t make any more attempts, unwilling to enter the room himself – even though he had always done just that – and reckons that Jinyoung had already woken up and went to class.

_Or maybe he slept over at Jihoon-sunbae’s dorm…_

Daehwi slaps himself hard in an effort to distract himself. “Daehwi, really, why are you doing this to yourself,” he tells rather than asks himself as he stares at the metal doorknob of the unit, contemplating whether to try again or just move on and go to class by himself.

But before he can even make up his mind, he suddenly hears a loud thud from inside the unit, startling him a tad. Without any hesitation, he quickly opens the passcode box and types in 059900.

[Wrong Passcode]

“What.” Daehwi deadpans.

_Unless he changed it…_

Daehwi takes a guess. It was an absurd guess and he’s just once again deluding himself to think that the dream that he had is not yet done, but he tries it nonetheless.

[Passcode Accepted]

 _0001_  

Daehwi closes his eyes and bites his lips in a futile attempt to calm himself. He doesn’t know when Jinyoung changed it, had no idea _why_ he changed it, and is utterly confused why it has to be that number. A plethora of other questions begin to circulate his very stressed mind again and it doesn’t help that his heart starts pumping in both surprise and agitation.

Also false hope.

Daehwi carefully enters the unit and is greeted by the darkness of the room. “Jinyoung… hyung?” he calls, hoping that he wasn’t mistaken when he heard the noise earlier. But instead of words, he hears a groan somewhere inside the room. He quickly turns on the light and sucks in a breath when he sees Jinyoung’s body sprawled on the timber floor.

“Hyung!” Daehwi rushes to his side in panic and hoists him up to sit. “What the heck are you doing on the floor? Why aren’t you—“ although when he touches Jinyoung’s arm, he finds it a tad warmer than usual. He feels the latter’s forehead then and realizes that he’s burning in fever.

“Dae… hwi?” Jinyoung croaks out, obviously in pain as each second that Daehwi carefully helps him back to his bed, not once did his face calm down.

Once up on his bed, Daehwi tucks him under the duvet and hushes him. “It’s okay, just go back to sleep.” Jinyoung mumbles a couple of incoherent words while Daehwi rushes to the bathroom, grabbing a fresh towel and soaking it in water. He sweeps Jinyoung’s fringe off of his forehead and places the soaked towel on it. Fortunately, Jinyoung only flinches a tad due to the contact with the cold water but doesn’t react adversely nonetheless.

When Daehwi motions to stand however, he gets stopped when he feels a hand tugging his fingers.

“Daehwi… where are you… going?” Jinyoung asks, almost coming off as a whisper. “Are you leaving?”

Daehwi sees Jinyoung struggling to keep his eyes open, but is staring at him nonetheless. And without thinking twice, he kneels back down and pets the older male’s head. “Don’t worry, I’ll be back.”

Jinyoung closes his eyes. “Promise?”

Daehwi only smiles. “Promise.”

Daehwi isn’t sure if Jinyoung falls immediately back to sleep after as he quickly rushes outside the unit. On the way to the convenience store, he sends Daniel a message.

 

I might not go to school today.  
Also, Jinyoung-hyung…  
**06:52**

 

Hmm, should I be concerned about this?  
Did something happen?  
**06:55**

 

Ah it’s just, Jinyoung-hyung’s sick ;;  
Just make an excuse for us, please hyung?  
**06:55**

 

Oh dear  
Okay, I got you two covered  
Take care of Jinyoung and be careful not to get  
sick too!  
**06:56**

 

Daehwi sighs in relief as he reads Daniel’s message. At least the man is easy to talk to and understand things quickly and very well.

Another good thing is that the convenience store is just close by so it doesn’t even take him five minutes to get there. He ponders over the selection of medicine available and just takes the one he’s familiar with. He doesn’t forget to grab fever head strips and thermometer as well, since both he and Jinyoung don’t have it.

Once he’s paid for the stuff, he walks onto the next block where the gopchang shop he and Jinyoung went to eat is located. As much as he’d want to cook for Jinyoung, he knows that his cooking skill is non-existent and he wouldn’t want to risk poisoning the male when he’s already so sick. He tells himself to learn at least cooking porridge however, so he need not to worry next time when there’s no food available.

Oh and also so he doesn’t have to go back to the place where a lot of realizations were made.

“Oh, what brings you here this early, young man?” the same staff who served him and Jinyoung during their last visit asks, surprise written all over his face. “Don’t you have class? Where’s your friend who went here with you last time?”

Daehwi’s not lying when he says that he’s actually a tad surprised himself that the staff remembers them, but he pays no mind to it that much. “My friend got sick so I’m here to get him porridge…” Daehwi tells him, walking all the way to the cashier.

The staff nods and quickly rings him up. “Luckily, they just finished making some. I’ll quickly get it for you.”

Daehwi tells him thanks in return and takes a seat at the nearest table beside the cash register. Unlike when they first went to the place together, the store is empty (most likely because it’s still early) and as much as he feels bad thinking like that, he hates it. He hates the peace, the silence. He hates how easily he can see himself and Jinyoung seated at the very corner of the store, sharing their gopchang and exchanging words together. He hates how even just sitting idly at the place makes him remember things again, of when he was still dreaming.

Of when he still thinks that their spark and connection were real.

He doesn’t even know why he’s doing what he’s doing – gathering medicine and even buying food for the male. Yes, as much as he hates to admit it, he is still Jinyoung’s friend, but if any, Jihoon should be there, right?

_Jihoon-sunbae is Jinyoung’s boyfriend after all._

Daehwi breathes heavily as he dials Woojin’s number. Fortunately, he gets answered almost immediately.

“Daehwi, what’s wrong? Did you forget something?” Woojin’s questions greet him, followed by another. “Wait, aren’t you supposed to be in class right now?”

Just when he was about to answer, the staff comes back with a paper bag. He hands the to-go food to Daehwi and smiles. “I hope your friend gets better. Take care, you two!”

Daehwi bows in gratitude as he collects the other bag he got from the convenience store. On the way out, he hears Woojin again. “Huh, where are you? Who’s sick?”

“Well, that’s the reason why I called. Jinyoung-hyung’s sick.” Daehwi tells Woojin and he hears the faintest gasp from the other line. “I need you to let Jihoon-sunbae know. I don’t have his number so I couldn’t inform him.”

The line lulls for a few moments as Daehwi walks back to their dorm building, but Woojin responds eventually. “I think it would be better to just let Jihoon know about this after our dance recital. It wouldn’t be wise to disturb his momentum now—it would affect the whole team.”

“But he still needs to know.” Daehwi retorts. “What time is your recital anyway?”

“Uh well… 6 in the evening…”

Daehwi almost chokes. It was only a quarter past 7, meaning, Jinyoung will be left alone for the whole day by himself. Once he arrives back inside the dorm unit, he sees Jinyoung’s figure on the bed, face obviously in pain from his fever, and all of his plans quickly crumble down like falling _jenga_ blocks.

_Well, there goes my plan of avoiding him for the rest of my life then._

It’s true. Seeing Jinyoung and being with him now hurts and only reminds Daehwi of the reality that he’d rather forget. Albeit, seeing him in bed alone and in pain is worse and Daehwi would rather remember that they are not meant to be than leave him all alone with no one beside him.

_Love hurts, but seeing the one you love in pain hurts more._

“Is it serious though? Maybe you can just help him now and have him rest for the whole day while you go to class?” Woojin suggests but Daehwi already decided.

“I’ll just stay with him until Jihoon-sunbae arrives.”

“But Hwi—“

“It’s okay, I’m fine. My conscience wouldn’t take it if I leave him all by himself when he looks like he’s dying.” Daehwi tries to sound nonchalant about it but he knows that he ain’t fooling anybody, especially his cousin. “So yeah, just let him know once you’re done with the recital.”

“Okay, just keep me updated then.” Woojin tells him and Daehwi agrees before finally ending the call.

Daehwi immediately walks up to Jinyoung’s side and removes the towel on his forehead. He cleans the newly bought thermometer and kneels down beside the male. He hesitates for a moment when he sees Jinyoung’s lips, almost gets caught in a trance but he shakes his head and opens the older’s mouth, sticking the thermometer under his tongue.

While the thermometer does its job, Daehwi takes a bin from the bathroom and fills it up with water. He then looks around Jinyoung’s closet for a change of clothes and finds matching plain gray sweats. Daehwi isn’t really used to nursing a sick person, but it’s at least common sense to change a patient into a fresh pair of clothes, especially when they had sweated a lot in it.

Although it’s easier said than done, especially when Jinyoung’s the one who he’s going to change.

He pulls out the thermometer when time’s up and sees the male’s temperature: 39°

“Jesus, what did you do to get this sick,” Daehwi comments as he returns the thermometer back to its case. Ever so gently and with much effort, he pulls Jinyoung to sit up. The male stirs for a bit but stays asleep nonetheless.

And that’s when Daehwi’s struggle starts.

Very carefully, Daehwi unbuttons Jinyoung’s pajama shirt and makes sure to focus on it, rather than on _another_ since there is no way that he will ogle and take advantage of a sickly person. The notion is very hard though of course. But in an effort to, again, ‘not take advantage of a sickly person’, Daehwi closes his eyes and immediately removes Jinyoung’s shirt once it’s undone – of course, using just his senses. He grabs ahold of the sweater that he got for Jinyoung next and puts it over his head. Opening one eye in the process while deliberately only staring at male’s head, Daehwi uses his very sharp instincts to slip the male’s arms through the sleeves.

Daehwi can’t say that he didn’t see anything from the male’s body (since his very apparent blush would only betray his words), but he made sure not to dwell too much on the thought and immediately wipes Jinyoung’s face and arms with the soaked towel to help cool down his temperature.

“Dae… hwi?”

The action wakes Jinyoung up, most likely due to the coldness of the towel, but seeing as he’s completely disoriented and is even struggling to keep his eyes open, Daehwi just continues until he’s managed to wipe up most of his upper body. After applying a fever patch on Jinyoung’s forehead and making sure that he’s seated comfortably on his bed (Daehwi placed pillows on his back), only then does he fully wake Jinyoung up to eat.

“Hyung, you need to eat even a bit so you can drink your medicine.” Daehwi tells Jinyoung, and he isn’t exactly sure if the latter did understand him but he proceeds to feed him nonetheless, making sure to cool down each bite before letting the male eat it.

“It’s… bland,” Jinyoung mumbles, and Daehwi stares at him in disbelief before chuckling.

“I know you can’t taste anything but you have to eat if you want to get better.” Daehwi sees Jinyoung frowning a bit but nods nonetheless, and eats all that Daehwi gives him.

Given, he doesn’t finish the bowl but Daehwi understands that a sickly person never has a good appetite to begin with anyway. So he saves the rest in the fridge and lets Jinyoung take the medicine he bought. Fortunately, despite Jinyoung’s blatant display of disliking towards the flu syrup, he still takes it in obediently.

Jinyoung has always been the one taking care of Daehwi so seeing him now helpless but still quite obedient, stirs something from within him, and it takes him his whole sheer will and effort not to coo.

Besides, Jinyoung’s sick so it’s only natural for him to act this way and Daehwi had to remind himself at least every 5 minutes so as to keep his heart intact.

_He’s only acting like this because he’s weak._

Once he’s done cleaning up the rest of the utensils, Daehwi returns to Jinyoung’s side and sees him already back to sleep. He reckons it’s the work of the medicine, which is quite better in his opinion since while he doesn’t know how Jinyoung got sick, he’s obviously sure that sleeping is the fastest way to his recovery.

Daehwi then notices the sticker on Jinyoung’s forehead and decides to change it. “I should put a new one—“ although before he can even walk away from his position right beside Jinyoung’s bed, a hand suddenly grabs his. 

“Stay beside me… please.”

Daehwi just looks at him, sees how his droopy eyes are staring back at him. “Jinyoung-hyung, I—“ but he doesn’t even have time to answer for before he knows it, Jinyoung had already pulled him onto the bed right next to him.

All alarms go off in Daehwi’s brain as he panics, suddenly becoming aware of the very little proximity between him and Jinyoung. “Hyung, what are you—“ he sucks in a breath when he feels a pair of hands snaking around his waist, easily pulling his frame under the duvet and holding him tightly.

And Daehwi curses internally, questioning how in the world can Jinyoung still be so strong despite being sick. Then again, he shouldn’t really be questioning that when he barely weighs anything.

But that isn’t even the main problem at hand. Daehwi’s heart is going into frenzy and he’s in danger of being caught, being that there’s barely any space between them at all. And while Daehwi’s sure that Jinyoung’s definitely out of it right now, he wouldn’t want to risk being exposed.

He wouldn’t want to risk having his heart be bare and defenseless.

With no means of hiding and fighting back.

_This is not good, Daehwi. Not good at all._

Daehwi tries to push Jinyoung’s chest in an attempt to put a space between them, but the idea is so hard when he’s trapped in the male’s embrace. The older’s hand securely holds Daehwi’s head which was snuggled on the crook of Jinyoung’s neck, whereas his other hand’s gently tucked on Daehwi’s waist.

“I’m sorry…”

Daehwi stops suddenly when he hears Jinyoung’s words.

_What._

“I’m sorry if I only realized everything now… I d—don’t want to hurt you.” Jinyoung almost chokes, his words barely inaudible against the fast pace of Daehwi’s heartbeat. Daehwi remains still, focusing on feeling their hearts beating at the same time. “I love you… I really do, but,” Daehwi shuts his eyes, unwilling to hear the next words.

“But I didn’t think _he_ would come back.” Daehwi breathes in heavily, confusion suddenly plaguing his consciousness. _He?_ “I thought he wouldn’t, but he did… and only now am I realizing that my feelings for him didn’t really disappear… I…” Jinyoung holds him tighter. “I still love _him._ ”

A couple of hush seconds pass before Jinyoung moves, holding Daehwi’s face and caressing his rosy cheeks gently. Daehwi only stares back at him, his big beady eyes held hostage by Jinyoung’s dark and hooded ones.

“I love you.”

Time suddenly stops for Daehwi when Jinyoung closes in the gap between their lips. It’s simple and chaste yet it felt as if every sliver of Daehwi’s body is burning, sparks igniting as he feels the warmth and intensity of Jinyoung’s emotions carried through his kiss.

It’s wrong, but Daehwi makes no motion to reject it, especially when he himself wants it more than he lets on.

Daehwi still wants Jinyoung no matter how much it hurts.

Jinyoung pulls back after what seemed like forever and Daehwi sees him donning a sad smile before the older’s tear filled eyes succumb to the effect of the medicine.

“But I’m sorry...”

 

 


	8. Deeper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \- Jinyoung becomes aggressive; he ain't stubborn for nothing  
> \- Daehwi tries his best to run away, but as usual, he only ends up failing  
> \- Daniel and Jihoon both end up being caught in the confusion of everything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I was supposed to upload this last night but electricity got cut off (I actually had to edit half of this chapter again 'cause I wasn't able to save last night kjdfkasjff)  
> Anyway, the next chapter will be the second to the last, followed by the epilogue (which I am still writing lol).
> 
> If any, the next chapter and the epilogue might be uploaded at the same time.  
> Hopefully next week, but if I donut finish the epilogue in time, then it will be posted in the next two weeks.  
> No later than that for sure. 
> 
> scream at me again after this!  
> xoxo

[Deeper](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrBTskSpKTs)

 

* * *

 

Jinyoung flutters his eyes open when he hears the loud ringing of the phone right beside him. His hand creeps up a couple of times on the bedside table before he successfully silences it. Only then does he feel the hammering pain on the temple of his head.

Despite nursing a very bad headache however, Jinyoung wills himself to sit up when he sees the time: 11:48. Still very much groggy, he doesn’t even give much thought about how late it is already, of how he had already missed about 2 of his morning classes for the day. He only stares straight ahead of him for at least five minutes, where a bowl of porridge and a bottled water are laid on the dining table, trying to gather his thoughts but to no avail. It was only when his phone lights up for a new message that he snaps out of his trance and grabs the said device to check.

 

Babe? Woojin forgot to tell me  
that you were sick and I only found out now.  
I had my recital yesterday  
so I couldn’t get to you immediately  
**09:22**

Woojin said Daehwi already took care of you  
I’m sorry if I couldn’t be there with you last night TT  
**09:23**

I would go to you right now  
but I have an exam to take.  
I met Daehwi this morning and he said that you’re  
doing better… but I’m still worried;;  
**09:24**

Call me when you wake up, please?  
**09:24**

I love you, please be better TT  
**09:25**

My exam will end in about 30-ish mins  
I’m going there after I’m done  
I miss you really :(  
**11:55**

Jinyoung looks over the messages for a few seconds and suddenly sucks in a breath. He wasn’t sure per se, and his memory is a bit hazy, but reading Jihoon’s messages tells him that what he dreamt of last night wasn’t just a mere product of his imagination.

_Did I really…_

He notices that there’s another unread message on his phone, so he backs up from his and Jihoon’s thread and internally panics when he sees Daehwi’s name.

 

Sorry if I had to go and leave you early.  
Your fever’s gone so I reckoned you can  
handle yourself now.  
  
I left a porridge on the table for you to eat  
when you wake up. Make sure to reheat it first  
or else you might get sick again.  
  
Also, don’t forget to take your medicine.  
There’s a non-drowse kind, I placed it by the  
bottled water. I know your fever’s gone but  
just for preemptive measures, just take one  
before you go to class.  
**07:30**

Or just don’t go to class at all.  
Just rest for the whole day. I already told most  
of our professors that you’re sick so just take the  
day off and get better soon.  
**07:32**

 

Jinyoung stares hard at the message, doubting if it was real or not. Yet each second that he stared at Daehwi’s message only adds more pieces to the hazy memory he had of last night.

And even as he forces himself to think that it actually was just a dream, he can’t for he knows that it’s real.

Jinyoung’s dream of cuddling and kissing Daehwi isn’t just a mere dream.

_It’s true. I really kissed Daehwi._

Jinyoung almost throws his phone in midair as he abruptly stands up, walking back and forth through the very little space that his room has to offer. _Okay, first calm down. Second… there’s no second, what the fuck really, Jinyoung?!_ Jinyoung ruffles his hair desperately, his thoughts becoming more and more vivid with each second.

Jinyoung had seen Daehwi up close before, but nothing could compare to how it was the night prior as there was literally no space in between them. His big beady and adorable uneven eyes, pink rosy porcelain skin adorned with a precious beauty mark right beside his plump and moist lips. Everything’s becoming more and more vivid in his mind that Jinyoung’s heart starts racing in remembrance, moved by the memory of being able to touch Daehwi.

Of being able to kiss the lips of the boy he oh so gravely misses.

Of the boy he oh so deeply loves.

Jinyoung’s not denying it. He had long tried to do so, had tried to focus on the relationship that he currently has. But it has come to a point where denying is futile since he knows it deep in himself that his heart had been the same all this time. Jinyoung’s heart has had only loved one person alone. Even as he disappeared and even as Jinyoung found another, it was no lie that the love he had grown since he was a child is still strong and is becoming even greater each day.

From the moment they met when they were six, up until now that they are in their twenties, Jinyoung had loved and still loves Daehwi all the same.

 

Daehwi, can we meet later?  
**12:09**

 

Jinyoung sends Daehwi a message, hoping that the boy will reply him. But much like as he had expected, he had already finished eating and there’s still no reply nor is it seen. He stares at his phone as he changes his clothes, wishing that a reply will suddenly appear yet instead of seeing a message, he gets a call.

“Babe, finally!” the caller greets him and Jinyoung unconsciously pauses, feeling his heart drop a little. “Are you okay now? How are you feeling? Did you eat already? How…” Jinyoung finishes changing as he lets Jihoon go on about his questions which is just basically a narration of how much he was worried in a form of an interview. “Just rest for the day, I’m on my way to your dorm—“

“Jihoon, it’s okay. _I’m_ okay.” Jinyoung cuts Jihoon off as he grabs his bag and walks out of his room. “I’m on the way to the campus right now so just wait for me there. I’m sorry if I made you worry.”

“Fine.” Jihoon agrees. “I’m sorry for leaving you alone, but can we talk while you walk here? I miss you so much.”

If Jinyoung’s being honest, he actually would rather be alone at the moment, to be in silence as he wants to rationalize his very confused and emotional thoughts. But instead of voicing out his inner musings, he chooses to indulge Jihoon as he narrates how he fared on his exam. It was only a minor subject yet for some reason, according to the male, the exam felt like it took forever and never had he actually studied as hard as how he did for an exam before (just like any other student there is, he assumes).

“I can’t believe I’m doing all of this for Psychology.”

Jinyoung just lets out an airy laughter, actually isn’t absorbing any of Jihoon’s words. While he can truly relate to Jihoon’s woes, he just couldn’t bring it in himself to empathize at that moment. Especially when his thoughts are at nowhere but a certain raven head who still isn’t replying his message.

“Why the long face?”

Jinyoung suddenly whips his head upwards and sees Jihoon looking at him in concern. The two of them end their call as Jihoon frowns. “As I’ve thought, you’re still not feeling well.” Jihoon motions his hand towards Jinyoung’s forehead but the latter quickly grabs his hand.

“I’m okay, Jihoon. Don’t worry.” Jinyoung tells him reassuringly.

If Jihoon is surprised by how Jinyoung had reacted so indifferently, he doesn’t show any of it and instead, only nods with a smile. “Okay, if you say so.” He then asks, “what time is your next class by the way?”

Jinyoung turns to his phone in query but stops when he hears Jihoon shouting, “Daehwi!” His heart almost stops when his eyes meet the boy’s, mirroring his shocked and utterly dumbfounded expression.

Daehwi stops walking and smiles.

Without any warning even, with their hands intertwined, Jihoon drags Jinyoung behind him as he slowly make his way towards Daehwi.

“Sunbae, see, I told you Jinyoung-hyung’s just fine.” Daehwi says as a greeting, wearing a small smile. “You didn’t really need to worry.”

“Sorry if this big baby had to bother you yesterday. You even missed some of your classes.” Jihoon purses his lips. “But are you on the way to your next class? I’m actually about to drop off Jinyoung.”

Jinyoung bites his lips and asks, “Do you want to walk there together?” He doesn’t notice how Jihoon’s hold on him tightens as he only stares at Daehwi, who in turn, looks back at him with a hesitant countenance. And it was only when he notices Daehwi’s gaze dropping at his and Jihoon’s intertwined hands that Jinyoung realizes what he just asked.

“You can go ahead of me. I actually have to briefly meet a friend before I go to class.”

Jinyoung opens his mouth to speak, but gets interrupted when Jihoon beats him to it. “Okay, then we’ll go on ahead.” Jihoon grins. “Be careful to not get late for your class!”

“You two be careful now as well! See you when I see you, sunbae!” Daehwi replies in return before he walks off into the opposite direction.

“See you in class!” Jinyoung shouts after him but Daehwi doesn’t look back.

Much like how he’s still refusing to talk.

“Babe,” Jinyoung snaps out of his trance when Jihoon squeezes his hand and pulls him forward. “Let’s go?”

He looks one last time towards to where Daehwi disappeared before he turns back to Jihoon and nods. They walk in silence for a while, their hands still tightly intertwined – something of which they usually don’t do as Jihoon would rather lock arms than hold hands.

It doesn’t help that even as they are already outside of Jinyoung’s class, Jihoon’s unwilling to part.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

And Jinyoung doesn’t know how to respond ‘cause even as he says yes, he knows it in himself that he’s not.

“You’ve been very off since the other day… a penny for your thoughts?” Jihoon waits for Jinyoung to respond but the latter only shakes his head.

“It’s… it’s nothing, really.” Jinyoung smiles. “I’ll go inside now. You should go to your next class too.”

“Yeah, okay.” Jihoon bites his lips and loosens his grip, but before Jinyoung could even let go, Jihoon adds, “I... I actually have plans tonight.”

Jinyoung raises an eyebrow in return while Jihoon continues. “I planned to watch a movie with a friend since our exam and recitals are ending, but I will cancel—“

“Which friend?”

It takes a moment for Jihoon to answer, eyes flickering in what Jinyoung presumes to be hesitation. “Woojin.” Jihoon bites his lips, waiting for any reaction from Jinyoung but none came. “but I’ll just cancel so I can stay with you tonight…”

Jinyoung doesn’t hear the rest. Upon hearing Jihoon’s first word, it all becomes clear to him. All thoughts and judgments suddenly align within him in a flick of an eye. He isn’t sure why or how, but he’s just sure that he finally knows what he wants.

Jinyoung finally found _his_ answer.

“Don’t.” Jinyoung smiles. “It’s okay. Just go with him.”

“But you’re still—“

“Jihoon,” Jinyoung gives Jihoon’s hand a squeeze before letting it go. “You’ll be late for your next class. Just go.”

Jihoon breathes heavily, mouth ajar as if wanting to say something in return, but just nods instead. “Okay, then just text me when you get home.” he smiles before finally leaving for his next class.

Jinyoung waits until Jihoon leaves the building and goes to sit at a bench not quite far from their room. The room is actually almost full, but he waits, not for their professor but for a certain raven head who apparently decided to go to class just when it starts to avoid Jinyoung.

Jinyoung isn’t sure per se, but his gut feeling tells him otherwise. Especially when he sees the boy finally arriving a couple of minutes later, who looks inside the room first before entering as if he’s looking out for something. Jinyoung carefully looks by the door and sees Daehwi seated at the very back corner, hidden behind one of their classmates with a boulder like body build – very unlikely of him, had he not been late.

Fortunately, there is an empty seat right beside him so just in time when their professor enters the room, Jinyoung also goes in and sits right beside Daehwi.

“Why’d you sit here at the very back?”

Jinyoung sees Daehwi’s eyes widen for a bit and almost hears the faintest gasp, but the lad immediately puts on a small smile as he says, “I thought you already went ahead earlier?”

“I was waiting for you.”

Daehwi only stares at him, face void of any emotion and Jinyoung feels himself becoming suffocated with each second that passes by. Their professor doesn’t do roll call, and immediately dives in to their lesson, so Daehwi breathes heavily as he whispers, “Don’t wait for me again.”

Jinyoung feels his heart drop at Daehwi’s words. Daehwi may have said it nonchalantly but the force of his words were stronger than any hateful remarks he had ever heard.

And he knows it actually means more than what Daehwi lets on.

But he doesn’t stop. Jinyoung knows that he should be listening to class and that he should let Daehwi be, but he really couldn’t concentrate if he’s being honest. Even if he does try to focus, he’ll only end up staring back at Daehwi.

Might as well just completely put his focus on him then.

Jinyoung rips a page from his notebook and starts scribbling. He grumbles internally at the sight of his handwriting akin to chicken feet, but continues nonetheless. When he’s done, he folds it twice before slipping it underneath Daehwi’s desk, right beside his hands.

Jinyoung quickly faces the front, resting his jaw on the palm of his hand as he tries to ignore the questioning stare of Daehwi that he sees through his peripheral vision.

“Seriously,” he hears Daehwi whisper, writing back on the note he gave. After a few seconds, Daehwi slips the paper back to him.

And screw trying to act passive. Once he receives the paper, Jinyoung quickly unfolds it.

 

I’m sorry, Daehwi.

 

For what?  
Why are you saying sorry when you didn’t do anything wrong lol

Can’t you just focus on the lecture?

 For once, I’m actually trying so you should too

 

It was only written on the paper but Jinyoung can actually hear Daehwi’s reprimanding voice in his head.

But even as he’s already scolded, he continues to write.

 

Are you mad at me?

 

Stop this.  
I’m not mad at you.

 

Then why are you avoiding me?

 

I’m not.  
Please, hyung.

 

Let’s talk after class then

 

Once Daehwi receives the letter, he quickly crumples it, tucks it in his pocket and smiles at Jinyoung before returning to face the front. Jinyoung was about to react but gets interrupted when he hears his name being called.

“Bae Jinyoung-gun, is there something wrong there?”

Jinyoung abruptly straightens up on his seat and shakes his head no. “No, sir. Sorry, I was just picking up a pen I dropped.” Jinyoung calmly answers despite the unwanted attention he received from the sudden call. Fortunately, their professor is lenient. If he really did know that Jinyoung had not been listening at all, he doesn’t say anything about it and just continues on with his lecture.

So Jinyoung has no choice but to give in and actually try to focus on their lecture. Except the main problem is that just as he had expected, his focus is still solely on the boy right next to him. While Jinyoung’s facing the front of the room, his mind and heart are in chaos, compelling himself to just turn to his left and look at the boy.

But he knows that Daehwi doesn’t want it. Daehwi might’ve said that he’s not mad, but Jinyoung knows better than to actually believe his words. This he proves when the class ends, he tries to call Daehwi but the said male’s already gone. Jinyoung thought it was okay since they had more classes together the next day. Yet exactly the following day, he only ended up with a heavy heart as he couldn’t get ahold of Daehwi more than ever. He was already gone before he can even approach him (he couldn’t even sit next to Daehwi as both Daniel and Jaehwan surrounded him like they’re his personal – not really useful – bodyguards).

But Jinyoung isn’t stubborn for nothing and he won’t give up just yet.

Without much thought, once all of their classes ended, Jinyoung runs back to their dorm in a speed of light. The notion isn’t easy as he had expected however, and Jinyoung almost felt as if he’s going to collapse the moment he arrives by his doorstep. Granted, the gap between his last classroom and his dorm unit is quite far, but his very weak stamina is mostly to blame.

Or maybe it was also the thought of confronting Daehwi that puts him on the edge, of the thought of finally baring his feelings to Daehwi putting his heart and mind into overdrive.

And it doesn’t help that just as he was about to enter his room to get a quick refreshment for his very parched throat, Jinyoung suddenly hears footsteps, followed by the very familiar voice of the person he had been trying to reach out to.

“Well, yeah, that’s what I’ve been trying to do the past few days.” Jinyoung hears Daehwi’s voice as he approaches, eyes trained on the floor, hindering him to even recognize the former’s presence. “And no matter what you tell me and even if it’s hard, I’ll just avoid Jinyoung-hyung—“

Daehwi crashes onto Jinyoung, staggering his balance but the latter is quick to catch him so only his phone falls.

Or maybe Daehwi’s heart as well, for that matter.

“Sorry, I wasn’t looking,” Daehwi tells him, wriggling from his hold and picking up his phone. He scans it for any damages before tucking it in his pocket once he deems it clear. “Now, if you’ll excuse me—“ Daehwi tries to walk past, but Jinyoung’s arm blocks him. “What are you doing?”

Jinyoung looks at him. “Daehwi, we need to talk.”

“Is there something we need to talk about?”

“You’ve been avoiding me.” Jinyoung blurts out. “Ever since we watched the movie, you’ve been avoiding me like the plague.”

Daehwi exhales, letting out an exasperated laugh. “I already told you before, I am _not_ avoiding you.”

“If you’re not avoiding me then you wouldn’t run off every time our classes end, nor would you find any excuses to go whenever you see me.” Jinyoung remains firm. “You said it yourself during that phone call just now, that it’s what you’ve been trying to do the past few days—avoiding me.”

“Jinyoung-hyung,” Daehwi calls. “Stop giving meaning to everything that I do.” Jinyoung’s stern gaze isn’t fazed however, and Daehwi scoffs. “What, do you miss me _that_ much that you’re becoming paranoid?”

“Yeah, I miss you.”

The scrunch on Daehwi’s eyebrows loosens and his face falls.

“I miss you, Daehwi, so, so much… and I… I can’t stand being away from you.” Jinyoung breathes in heavily before he says, “I want to be with you.”

Jinyoung takes a step forward, but Daehwi doesn’t let him come any closer as he backs away quickly. “Why are you doing this?” he asks – almost shouts. “Why are you doing this?!” he exclaims. “Why do you keep on confusing me when you already have someone?!”

“Daehwi—“

“I like you.” Daehwi blurts out. “From the moment we first met… I like—“ he stops and breathes. “I… I love you, Jinyoung-hyung.”

Jinyoung stops breathing, mind and heart suddenly becoming both overwhelmed with the thoughts of the boy confessing right in front of him.

“But… but you have Jihoon-hyung,”

Then another person suddenly makes his way into Jinyoung’s mind and he wavers, conflicted at the ghost of the past and the revelation of the present.

“And who am I to interfere such a beautiful relationship like yours?”

Yet despite all of his internal conflict and struggle, Jinyoung chooses to believe in the chances of the future.

“You won’t ever interfere, not now… not ever.”

“What do you mean I won’t?” Daehwi laughs dryly. “Oh right, because I don’t amount to anything at all—“

“Daehwi, I like you, please—no… I love you,” Jinyoung retorts, almost sounding desperate. “Can’t you see that you’re the one I want? Do you think I’ll really go to this extent if I didn’t?”

“And you expect me to believe you? Stop confusing me!” Daehwi cries, eyes already glassy as he stares back at Jinyoung. “You can’t just tell me that you love me and still be with another—“ he chokes up on his words, breathing deeply as he tries to stop the tears from falling. “That’s not how things work, Bae Jinyoung. You can’t have everything. The world doesn’t revolve around you—“

And it was then when time suddenly stops for Daehwi as Jinyoung grabs his arm and pulls him close, claiming his lips without any hesitation. Jinyoung loosens his hold when he doesn’t feel any resistance and brings his hands to Daehwi’s face, caressing his cheeks and wiping the tears that had finally broke free. It hurt him to an extent, of how he could feel the younger’s tears through his face, but he feels lighter when Daehwi doesn’t resist and kisses him back, clutching on to his chest tightly.

Jinyoung feels light. Being able to hold Daehwi, to feel him, to kiss him, and to convey every frenzied emotions he had, made him free.

And he pulls Daehwi closer, kisses him further, and allows himself to fall deeper.

“Daehwi…”

But his escape from reality gets cut off short when Daehwi abruptly pushes him, wiping away his tears after.

“Dae—“ Jinyoung feels Daehwi’s hand on his face with a loud smack, but he doesn’t say anything. He just touches his throbbing cheek after and watches as Daehwi escapes back to his room.

Just at the same time as Jinyoung’s tears finally fall.

 

* * *

 

“Daehwi,”

“Hm?”

“Are you seriously going to keep this up?”

“Keep up what?”

“This whole avoiding Jinyoung act that you’re doing.”

Daehwi doesn’t respond and acts as if he didn’t hear anything so Daniel continues, “Even though you don’t tell anything to me nor to Jaehwan, sorry to say but you’re not exactly being subtle about it.” Daehwi just sighs whereas Daniel shrugs. “For how long are you going to continue this though?”

Daehwi chooses to ignore Daniel’s question and turns away from him. He touches his lips as the memories of the night a week ago suddenly resurfaces back through his mind like it was just yesterday.

_“I want to be with you. Daehwi, I like you, please—no… I love you. Can’t you see that you’re the one I want? Do you think I’ll really go to this extent if I didn’t?”_

Daehwi slaps himself, trying to eradicate the confusing and heartbreaking thoughts that are threatening to swallow him whole – which is what he had been trying to do for the whole week.

And in all fairness to him, the whole notion has both been successful and disastrous.

Since they have almost all of their classes together, it would be inevitable to see him in class. That he can handle since what else would he need both Daniel and Jaehwan for (okay maybe he does need them but they didn’t need to know that)? Not to mention, he can always just rush out once classes end – exactly what he has been doing for the past week.

And to avoid having the same encounter as what they’ve had before – when Jinyoung waited for Daehwi outside their dorm rooms – Daehwi chose to stay out of his dorm for the meantime. One would think that he would stay over at his cousin’s place since that’s where he had gone to prior to staying at his dorm, but Daehwi currently refuses to even see Woojin.

_“I decided I’ll try to court Jihoon.”_

Not when the male just shamelessly decided to go after someone who is currently in a relationship.

_“You what?” Daehwi spats out in disbelief. “Don’t you even dare ruin them, hyung. What the hell?”_

_“I just don’t want to have regrets, Hwi. I know he and Jinyoung are still together, so I would only tell him how I really feel. Whatever he says, I’ll accept it. It would feel better for me to be rejected after trying, than not having tried at all.”_

Granted, Daehwi had known about Woojin’s feelings even from before, and he’s not exactly in the place to judge him nor does he have any right to do so, but a part of him just couldn’t digest the idea of even trying to break a relationship built upon trust and friendship.

A part of him that keeps on saying that he should be the same too. A part of him that wants to _do_ the same too.

But Daehwi knows better than to give in to his personal interest. Daehwi’s selfish – well, he believes that all people are selfish in their own way – but he isn’t so much that he’d want to purposely ruin what Jinyoung and Jihoon have.

So as to avoid any unnecessary arguments between him and Woojin (he loves his cousin after all), Daehwi opted to stay over Daniel’s place. He’s just very grateful since even as he has been staying there for a week already, the male never really minded. Daehwi’s not meaning to stay there forever anyway. He just doesn’t know until when, and he actually would rather not bother the older since he is a sleepless senior after all.

But Daehwi doesn’t know where else to take refuge. Jaehwan’s just the same as Daniel (just worse) and Daehwi would rather be pried by Daniel than be demonized by Jaehwan – he knows that’s exactly what will happen if he stayed with the latter.

So Daehwi’s currently lying down on Daniel’s bed, watching as the male’s practicing for a recital he has. Fortunately, it’s Friday and there isn’t much home works to do so Daehwi could take it easy and act as if he’s just on any other sleepover.

Honestly, there is actually one paper work due soon for him, but it isn’t just any paper work. It was a joint paper work for him and none other than the person he had been trying to avoid this whole time.

_Bae Jinyoung._

Oh how much Daehwi wants to scream for being a weak bitch and choosing the male to be his partner instead of anybody else. Now he has to worry even about that damned paper work.

And speaking of the devil, Daehwi suddenly receives a message.

 

Daehwi, let’s meet up.  
We need to finalize our joint paper  
for literature.  
**10:23**

 

Are you really asking me to  
meet up at this time of the night?  
**10:25**

 

To be fair, you haven’t been home  
for a week  
**10:25**

 

And so?  
What’s it to you?  
**10:27**

 

It’s a big problem to me  
**10:27**

I miss you so much Daehwi  
please  
**10:28**

 

Daehwi breathes heavily.

 

Forget about the report  
I have something to submit for us already  
goodnight hyung  
**10:30**

 

Daehwi we need to work on the report together  
you can’t just take everythingby yourself just bcause  
you don’t want to see me  
**10:31**

I know you do so stop this act and just  
please allow me to see you  
**10:35**

Daehwi please  
**10:39**

 

When Daehwi doesn’t answer anymore, he feels his phone vibrating, signaling for an incoming call. And as expected, he sees Jinyoung’s name.

With an exasperated sigh, Daehwi sits up abruptly, successfully catching Daniel’s attention. “What?” Daniel asks.

“Let’s go out, hyung.”

Daniel stops his routine and fakes a laugh. “After ignoring me, you’re going to ask me out now? What, to eat? Do you really think I’ll say yes?”

Daehwi pouts. Daniel huffs.

“You’re definitely right. I’m indeed saying yes.” Says Daniel. “I’ll just change then let’s go.”

Daehwi chuckles as he watches Daniel quickly change into warmer clothes. Daehwi just puts on a padded jacket and in no less than 5 minutes, the two of them walk out of the room.

“What do you want to eat?”

Daehwi just shrugs. “I actually don’t have anything in mind so let’s go with whatever you want.”

Daniel raises an eyebrow in confusion. “Then why the heck did you ask me out to eat?”

Instead of answering, Daehwi just smiles and pushes Daniel to nowhere in particular. The latter just shakes his head and starts walking with Daehwi right beside him. It’s true though, what Daehwi said. He didn’t have any particular food that he wanted in mind. If he’s being honest, he actually didn’t really think of eating. He just wanted to unwind, to go out and distract himself from the thoughts of Jinyoung who is continuously in his mind.

And while it doesn’t really matter if Daniel finds out about it, he isn’t really in the mood to talk about it either. He’s just thankful that Daniel’s perpetually craving for food so he didn’t need to think up of any other reason why he wanted to go out. Plus, this way, he can drink without having to worry about how to go home since Daniel will be with him anyway.

_Yes, soju sounds really nice right now._

“You want to drink?”

Daehwi snaps out of his thoughts when he hears Daniel, but what surprises him more is when he realizes where they are. “Gopchang?”

“Well, I’m craving for some and we can drink as well.” Daniel shrugs. “So are you up for it? It’s Friday anyway.”

Daehwi thinks about it hard, in between liking and hating the idea. He honestly loves gopchang and would eat it at any given time of the day, but the location of the gopchang restaurant isn’t really helping his grand scheme of avoiding Jinyoung since it’s just a block away from their dorms.

Then again, even as it’s only a block away, it’s not like Jinyoung will just suddenly materialize out of nowhere. It’s Friday. Daehwi will bet Daniel’s stash of Jellies that Jinyoung is over at Jihoon’s place.

Probably cuddling. Probably kissing.

And Daehwi just _probably_ wants to burn his brain.

Daehwi slaps his face and breathes heavily. “Okay, let’s go.” He saunters inside the place and sits at a random table without much thought, uncaring of the weird stare Daniel’s giving him.

“2 sets as well as 2 bottles of soju, please!” Daniel calls out to one of the staffs who nods in understanding.

The night starts for Daehwi fast as their food immediately arrives together with the cold bottles of the green demon, which he knows will be the cause of his untimely downfall. While Daehwi isn’t a heavy drinker, he can still hold a decent amount of alcohol in his system. Although, as time passes on, and the more that he and Daniel eat, the more he begins to crave for more alcohol.

And drinking alcohol more than his usual intake is what Daehwi does.

The idea is not a good decision however, as despite his claims of having a decent alcohol tolerance, the intoxication suddenly hits him like a ton of boulder.

“Hwi, shouldn’t you slow down?”

Daehwi knows his limit – 1 bottle – yet by the time Daniel decides to stop him, he’s already fallen into twice the trap of the green devil.

“Ey, I’m _okaaay_!” Daehwi chirps. He wags his pointer finger and points it to himself. “Are you telling me that I’m drunk?” he hiccups, eyes hooded as he stares intently at Daniel. “That’s so funny, really! Haaaah!”

Daniel laughs, slightly worried but mostly amused. He had drank with Daehwi before, but the lad only took what he can and only up to his limit. He would be tipsy, high and clearly in a good mood, but never had he actually drank as much as how he is currently doing. It was an amusing sight since it was Daniel’s first time to see an overly hyper and talkative Daehwi (much more than his usual talkative self, if that is even possible), but also a tad worrying since the lad wouldn’t drink a lot if he doesn’t have anything bothering him.

And while with each passing second, Daehwi’s becoming more and more of all over the place, Daniel just lets him be. The former’s stick thin, so he can easily take him home if needed. But it’s more of the curiosity that lets him be lenient, of wanting to know the reason behind Daehwi’s questionable actions.

It doesn’t take a lot to ask however, as before he can even do so, Daehwi stands, trudges over to his side and sits beside him with a dissatisfied look.

“Hyung, you know I’m… I’m avoiding Jinyoung-hyung, right? Hah…”

“Well, not only me but everybody actually knows—“ Daniel stops when he sees Daehwi’s deadpan expression. He clears his throat and smiles. “I mean yeah, I know, but you didn’t really tell me the reason and I find it really weird since you’ve been so close the past few months.”

Daehwi motions for Daniel to come close with his finger. The older raises an eyebrow in query, but obliges nonetheless.

“Do you really want to know the reason?”

Daniel nods.

“Well… Jinyoung-hyung…”

“Jinyoung what?”

“Jinyoung-hyung kissed me.”

“Jinyoung kissed you.”

“Yeah, he kissed me.”

“He kissed you.” After at least five seconds, Daniel’s eyes bulge. “He what.” he blurts out, a lot louder than necessary.

After attracting the attention of the neighboring patrons, Daehwi immediately slaps Daniel’s mouth and glares at the older male. Once the other guests went back to their own businesses, Daniel removes Daehwi’s hand from his face and asks, “Did I hear that right? Jinyoung kissed you? As in like, kiss _kiss_? Or like flying kiss or—“

“What do you mean by kiss kiss? Flying kiss? Seriously hyung, are you in kinder or what.”

“How the hell would I know what you fetuses do!”

Daehwi snorts but continues. “Yeah well, he kissed me. On the lips.”

“Wow,” Daniel whistles. “But shouldn’t you already be rejoicing or like throwing a party?” he asks in utter confusion. “Your man just kissed you, meaning he likes you back. What’s the problem?”

Daehwi stares at Daniel for a few lull seconds, eyes big and beady, before he laughs bitterly and turns away.

“He has a boyfriend.”

And Daehwi himself breaks his heart with his own words.

“Oh.”

“You don’t even seem surprise.”

“Well, I actually had a hunch before, but like… I wasn’t sure myself and I didn’t want to give out false information if I was really wrong…” Daniel fiddles with the edge of his glass as he continues, “But apparently, I am not. I just want to confirm though, is it… is it Jihoon?”

Daehwi laughs. “Is there even a need to ask?”

Daniel feels it, the sarcasm and bitterness dripping with each of Daehwi’s words, but the guilt is so much more that he ends up taking another shot. “I’m sorry Hwi, I should’ve shared my thoughts with you before—“

“Hyung, you didn’t do anything wrong. You said it yourself that you weren’t sure and I can never blame you for that. There’s no need to apologize.” Daehwi pours himself another glass and takes a huge gulp. He feels the alcohol burning his throat and stomach, and his mind is almost close to falling into the pits of hell, but the desire to just forget wills him to continue and be drowned into the poison that is alcohol.

Daniel would’ve tried to stop him, but before he can even do so, Daehwi suddenly slams his glass on the table and wipes his lips in frustration.

“See, if there’s anyone to blame for all of this, it would be Bae Jinyoung!” Daehwi abruptly screams, allowing them – once again – to gather unwanted attention towards their table. Daniel immediately wraps his arm around Daehwi and covers his mouth in an attempt to shush him.

But of course, Daehwi isn’t one to back off so easily.

“Ow!” Daniel exclaims, immediately pulling his hand back after Daehwi bit his fingers. “What the hell?!”

“You listen to me,” Daehwi huffs. “Bae Jinyoung is a casanova who collects hearts for fun!” He points his finger to Daniel (an action of which he wouldn’t normally do no matter what since he is still younger), and the latter immediately gathers that he’s definitely crossing over to the dark side. “I’m trying to move on! I’m already forgetting him!”

Daniel doesn’t let this chance go by so easily however. “Are you sure though?”

“Well, no! But that’s not the point!” Daehwi stomps his fist on the table and stands up (by this time, the neighboring patrons already stopped caring, much to Daniel’s relief). “What I’m saying is that, I’m so sick of being dragged around by him! He has a boyfriend, yet he has the nerve to kiss me?!” Daehwi shrieks even, obviously out of his mind. “What kind of bullshit is that—“

And apparently, not only is his mind out of it, but also his balance since almost all too suddenly, he trips on his own leg (which isn’t really surprising) and falls backwards.

“Daehwi!” Daniel calls him but Daehwi only closes his eyes and waits for the impact of the floor.

Yet a few moments pass and he feels as if he’s just hovering, his shoulders supported by something – keeping him from falling. Daehwi opens one eye and sees Daniel clutching his arm. “Hyung—“ but even as he’s piss drunk, he gathers soon enough that another person was supporting him from behind, and he immediately turns pale once he meets the face of his savior.

_What the fuck._

Daehwi quickly scrambles to his feet, face contorting in both dizziness and fury. “Jinyoung-hyung, what the hell are you doing here?” he asks, eyeing the male who kept an impassive look despite the situation.

“We’re leaving.” Jinyoung simply tells him as he grabs Daehwi’s hand.

“Who the hell do you think you are to tell me what to do?” Daehwi shrugs his hand off. “I won’t go with you.”

“Daehwi, let’s go—“

“Jinyoung,” Daniel finally interrupts, holding on to Daehwi’s other arm protectively. “Maybe you’re forgetting… but you have Jihoon.”

“What about me?”

And the already loud and disorganized scene suddenly gets worse. Daehwi and Daniel both look towards the source of the voice and sees a very much dumbfounded Jihoon. “Jinyoung… what’s going on?”

Daehwi can’t help but laugh at the absurdness of the situation. To think that of all the days that the couple had to visit the restaurant, they really just had to do it on the same day as Daehwi.

And Daehwi, bless him, just wants to punch someone or maybe simply rest.

He is just so done.

Contrary to his expectation however, of Jinyoung backing off and leaving with Jihoon, he hears the former murmuring something before grabbing Daehwi’s hand and forcefully dragging him outside, leaving both Daniel and Jihoon completely clueless about the entire exchange.

 

 


	9. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time doesn't stop just because one wants it to. 
> 
> \- Jinyoung becomes corrupted in the head  
> \- Daehwi wakes up _on_ the wrong bed  
> \- Jihoon's words will forever be left unsaid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are nearing the end!  
> And since I will be getting busy from now on, I'll post all of the remaining chapters at once.  
> We only have Home, Beautiful, and the epilogue (12th Star) left so less geddit!
> 
> *Wasn't going to update today since AO3 was down earlier but here we are!  
> This is my fave chapter btw huehue I hope y'all like it too. 
> 
> XOXO

[HOME](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DCsnqm7clFs)

* * *

 

 

Daehwi, please  
**10:39**

It’s been past thirty minutes since the number 1* disappeared, yet he still has a blank inbox.

Jinyoung just wants to cry.

Or maybe knock himself out. He’s tired; he had been working on the report for the both of them so that Daehwi wouldn’t have to do anything at all. It all becomes for naught however, since Daehwi, apparently, did just the exact same thing – which he should’ve expected of in the first place since he’s dealing with one of the top notchers of the university entrance exams after all.

While he actually takes pride in his literature and arts skills, it takes Jinyoung a whole lot to finish the report. Not because he didn’t digest the movie (he had watched it before), but rather because a special person kept on appearing in his mind, keeping him on the edges and preventing him from thinking about anything else.

And it only gets worse when Jinyoung receives a call from the person he’d rather currently avoid.

“Hey.”

“What’s up?”

“Woojin and I just finished the movie. He’s dropping me off by the bus stop.”

Jinyoung hums but it only comes out as a sigh. Jihoon isn’t oblivious to this and asks, “Are you still feeling unwell? Are you okay?”

 _I’m not..._ “I am.”

“But have you eaten dinner already?” Jinyoung hears Jihoon saying a soft bye, as well as the sound of a machine. After a couple of seconds, the din becomes lighter and lighter until he hears Jihoon’s voice again. “Sorry, I had to catch the bus. Anyway, let’s eat dinner together?”

Jinyoung wants to say no. He just wants to lay down on his bed and wrap himself in his thick duvet, close his eyes and breathe steadily.

Maybe then everything will sort out by itself the next time he opens his eyes.

But he knows better than to run away. He knows that choosing to be holed up in his room won’t change the fact that he is still a mess and that it won’t do anything to help himself. So breathing heavily, he pulls out a jacket from his closet and asks Jihoon, “Sure, where though?”

“I’m craving for gopchang right now, if that’s okay with you? We can just meet there.” Jinyoung just hums in response as he starts walking. “I’m actually on the way to your place now.” Jihoon lags a couple of moments before he continues. “I took the bus going to your district.”

“Huh, why?” Jinyoung mumbles. “I can just pick you up—“

“Well, I was thinking of visiting Daehwi, then maybe stay over at your place after.”

Jinyoung idles, unsure of how to actually react. “Uh… Daehwi hasn’t been to his dorm for the past few days actually.”

“But why?”

“I-I don’t really know…” Jinyoung trails off, slowly descends the stairs and almost shivers due to the gush of wind that greets him. “I think he’s staying over at Woojin-hyung’s place.”

“I didn’t see him there though?” Jihoon counters.

“He could’ve went out or something, or maybe you missed him.”

“But Woojin didn’t tell me anything about Daehwi staying over at his place.”

The bus stop near the gopchang place isn’t far, so it only takes Jinyoung less than ten minutes to walk there. And when he does, he stands just right in front of the bus stop and watches as vehicles pass him by, headlights and skyscrapers seemingly twinkling amidst the darkness of the sky.

Jinyoung just breathes and closes his eyes in silence.

“Does Woojin-hyung have to tell you everything?” he pauses, seeing an approaching bus from afar. “You… you never did that to me.”

He hears a shuffling sound in the background, at the same time as the bus comes to a complete stop.

“Sorry, I didn’t catch that—“ Jihoon’s voice cuts off when he sees Jinyoung right on the side walk in front of him. “Jinyoungie!” he calls, hurries down the bus and tackles Jinyoung in a tight hug. Jinyoung almost loses balance even if not for the strong hold of Jihoon.

“Whoa, easy there!”

Jihoon laughs, burying his face against Jinyoung’s shoulders. “Why are you so frail…” he looks up at Jinyoung and pouts. “I need to feed you more.”

“And that’s what you’re going to do now, right?” Jinyoug ruffles Jihoon’s hair, making the older frown but nods nonetheless.

Jihoon holds his hand again as they slowly walk, clasping each of their fingers together. It has been a while since Jihoon started doing this yet for some reason, Jinyoung still couldn’t get used to it. There’s a crippling feeling inside of him that’s telling him to just accept it and hold on.

But how can he hold on when it’s no question that the two of them have already started to let go?

“Wow, I missed this place.” Jihoon breathes in as they walk inside, the smell of grill immediately hitting their senses. Jinyoung scans the place, noting how there are only a few customers despite it being a rush hour. He’s not complaining though, and is actually quite relieved.

He turns to Jihoon and sees the male looking at the menu board. “So where should we—“ his words get cut short off however, once he catches sight of a familiar blonde and a raven head seated at the very corner, a few meters behind Jihoon.

_Daehwi and Daniel-hyung?_

“Where should we what—hey!” Jihoon yelps when Jinyoung immediately pushes him to seat on the nearest table beside them, making sure that the male’s back is facing the two. Jinyoung himself follows suit and sits across from Jihoon who, obviously, doesn’t miss this sudden change. “Why are you there?”

Jinyoung blinks, looking at everywhere but Jihoon as he reasons, “Well, it’s easier for us both to grill if we’re across from each other. Remember last time, I kept on hitting you with my elbow?”

Jihoon laughs in remembrance. “Oh yeah, that’s true. But I’m okay with that though.” Jihoon says. “I can just grill for the two of us?”

“It’s… it’s okay. I’ll do it for us this time, yeah?” to avoid any more of Jihoon’s comeback, Jinyoung calls on one of the staffs and orders two sets for them both. During the while that he orders, he sees Jihoon turning his attention onto the menu. Once Jinyoung’s done though, his focus immediately gets sucked into the last table on their line, where he sees both Daehwi and Daniel having a conversation while eating.

It’s quite unnerving, to say the least, how Daehwi had ignored his message yet Jinyoung finds him eating gopchang (their favorite food at that!) with Daniel.

Without Jaehwan.

Only Daehwi and Daniel.

Only the two of them.

Jinyoung knows that Daehwi and Daniel are good friends. He doesn’t want to distort their friendship (which is what he’s actually really doing), but he can’t help but think and get the impression that maybe there’s a chance that Daniel possibly likes Daehwi more than just a brother. It’s insane and mad – preposterous even. Daehwi would probably even avoid him even more if he knew that Jinyoung thought that way.

Jinyoung knows he’s being sick, but what else would he think when every single time they would hang out outside of school, Jaehwan – Jinyoung’s only reason for believing that Daniel doesn’t like Daehwi in _that_ kind of way – would be missing. Not to mention the fact that from his position, all he can see is how Daniel had kept on putting food on Daehwi’s plate.

And Daehwi himself, is actually smiling.

The two are talking about something and Jinyoung had never wished to see Jaehwan more than ever so that he can balance out the two and give Jinyoung a sense of security by being the middleman. It was wishful thinking though since Jaehwan is not around so that thought is already out.

Hearing their conversation isn’t even an option at this point, as despite wanting to know what they were really talking about, despite wanting to know the reason behind Daehwi’s smile, all Jinyoung can hear are the steady sound of the intestines dancing around the pan, as well as Jihoon’s monologue about how annoying Mr. Hwang and Mr. Ong are.

“So like, I’m not sure… maybe there’s really just a third party involved…”

Jinyoung simply shrugs. If he’s being honest, he actually isn’t sure if Jihoon’s really talking about their professors still, or just his cousin who had been on and off with her boyfriend for the nth time already (or was it his aunt?). While he’s trying very hard to listen and do the right responses for every interval of their conversation, it proves to still be a great obstacle considering that the view he has on the farthest table is as vivid as it could ever be.

Daehwi’s eye smile and laughter.

Even the green bottle that, for some reason, had made its way onto their table.  

“So what do you think?”

Jinyoung stops abruptly, eyes wide as if caught in the act of a crime. He gulps, seeing Jihoon’s questioning stare and tries to act natural. “Y-yes?” He says, obviously unsure and far from being natural.

If Jihoon finds it weird, he doesn’t say anything of it and instead, grins in delight and calls one of the staffs. “Can we please get a bottle of soju? Thanks!” Jihoon turns back to Jinyoung after and says, “I thought you’d say no. You usually stop me when I want to drink.”

Jinyoung lets out an airy laughter, feeling weary from the suddenness of the situation. Jihoon’s right though. Whereas Jinyoung has a high alcohol tolerance, Jihoon is the opposite, so only rarely does he let Jihoon drink since the male can’t hold his alcohol for his own dear life.

Yet even without the male asking for it, Jinyoung might’ve eventually called for it himself.

Especially since from being seated right across from each other like how Jinyoung and Jihoon are, Daehwi is now sitting right beside Daniel.

The two of them very _close_ to each other.

And Jinyoung (bless him and his burning emotions) is almost close to losing it.

Before the staff can even lay the green bottle down on their table, Jinyoung grabs it in a haste and opens the cap with a pop. Pouring a shot glass for himself, Jinyoung takes it in one big gulp and puts down his glass on the table with a loud clack after.

“Woah, what’s going on?” Jihoon asks, surprised with the sudden eagerness towards alcohol. Jinyoung pours him a drink as well, but he makes sure to only pour half of the small glass. Jihoon scoffs. “You go all out with Soju but barely give me any. You’re really going to do this, huh.”

“Unlike you, I can drink two bottles and I won’t even feel anything.”

“Not when you’re barely eating anything.” Jihoon points out and Jinyoung couldn’t help but fall silent, unable to counter the older’s words since it’s true. He’s barely eating anything. Then again, he couldn’t _feel_ anything. He last ate around noon and it’s already nearly midnight, yet he just couldn’t feel the hunger.

It’s no wonder though, especially when the boy he had been watching all this time is now right beside Daniel with their backs facing him. Jinyoung can only imagine what important matter they could be talking about that they just really have to be whispering oh so closely to each other.

_Where the damn is Kim Jaehwan when you need him?_

“I’m just not that hungry, to be honest.” Jinyoung says, both false and true. He contemplates on messaging Jaehwan just so he can be at peace knowing that Daniel can’t do anything, but his attention gets robbed when he suddenly hears a ‘what’ out of nowhere.

He then sees both Daehwi and Daniel hide behind the backrest of their sofa, avoiding everybody’s eyes – including Jinyoung’s – that they managed to get.

“What was that—“ Jihoon was about to look behind him but Jinyoung is quicker to shove a piece of gopchang in his mouth.

“Eat. This is why you’re losing weight, you’re always so distracted.” Jinyoung avoids Jihoon’s eyes, guilty of being like what he said as well.

After swallowing down the piece, Jihoon laughs softly. “You’re so weird today.” He grabs the bottle of Soju and pours their glasses – making sure to fill his to the brim.

“Oi, Park Jihoon—“

“Don’t worry, I won’t drink a lot. You’re here with me anyway, right?”

Jinyoung watches as Jihoon takes the glass in one shot, face scrunching afterwards due to the strong taste of alcohol. “I suppose so.” He drinks his as well, and notices Jihoon staring at him after.

“What? You okay?”

Jihoon nods as he fiddles with the shot glass in his hand. “I actually wanted to talk to you about something.” Jinyoung raises an eyebrow as Jihoon continues, “It’s the reason why I wanted to drink… to have like a boost of courage…” he trails off before taking another shot of soju.

That’s only when Jinyoung notices the bizarre air surrounding Jihoon, of how in contrast to his usual perky and confident aura, the latter is unusually passive, as if in deep thought.

“Jihoon, is there something wrong?”

“Wrong you ask, hah.” Jihoon huffs, looking at anything but Jinyoung. “Well, to be honest… we—“

“…. e Jinyoung!”

Both Jihoon and Jinyoung turn still. “Did I just hear someone call you or something?” Jihoon asks, face full of confusion and doubt.

In contrast to Jihoon though, Jinyoung is panicking internally, struggling to control the emotions on his face. “I-I don’t know… I’m not sure either. You know how… how Jinyoung is a common name, right? Hah…” He tells a lie, coughing to alleviate the harsh beating of his heart. Jinyoung saw it, how Daehwi had stood up from his seat and flailed his arms in the air, shouting before being hoisted back down by Daniel.

And now all doubts he had with Daniel gets overshadowed by the fact that right at that moment, Daehwi and the older are probably talking about him. He’s not sure about the details, and there’s a high chance that Daehwi’s probably making a speech of how much he hates Jinyoung, but he couldn’t really care less.

At that moment, all he can care of is how there’s progress. The fact that Daehwi’s actually talking about him… Jinyoung can finally see the light!

“Wow, I didn’t think the alcohol would get to me _that_ quickly, but apparently, it did.” Jihoon chuckles dryly as he looks down on the table, again, playing with his shot glass and obviously still staggered.

Jinyoung, despite heavily distracted by the sudden intermission, tries his best to focus back on Jihoon. More so since the latter is looking a tad more fidgety than before. “So uhm… what were you saying again?”

Jihoon jumps a little at the question, and he straightens up on his seat. “About that, actually, I—“

“You listen to me, Bae Jinyoung is a casanova who collects hearts for fun!”

Jihoon need not to ask this time for the words are very clear that even Jinyoung is too shocked to move and distract him like how he has been doing. “Is that Daniel-hyung… and Daehwi?” Jihoon asks, finding out the source of the ruckus inside the restaurant. “Are they fighting?”

Although he watched their table the whole time, Jinyoung couldn’t give an answer since he, himself, isn’t quite sure. If looking from an outsider’s perspective however, it does look like the two are fighting and even Jinyoung would think like so if he didn’t know Daniel.

“Well, no! But that’s not the point!” Jinyoung sees Daehwi standing up again, pointing a finger towards Daniel accusingly. Miraculously however, even with the loud noise and disturbance Daehwi and Daniel were causing, their neighboring patrons are amiss and continued on with their own businesses. “What I’m saying is that, I’m so sick of being dragged around by him! He has a boyfriend, yet he has the nerve to kiss me?!” he shrieks, most probably trying his best to remain his balance but is obviously failing, given his staggering movements.

And Jihoon, as well, doesn’t miss any of this.

“What…” he mumbles, turning back to Jinyoung with a baffled expression. “Is Daehwi drunk or something? I thought… I heard him say you kissed him—” Jihoon gets cut off when Jinyoung hastily runs without a word.

“What kind of bullshit is that—“

Jinyoung doesn’t know how he did it. The moment he saw Daehwi looking as if he’s losing balance, his legs just acted on impulse and made their way towards the boy, successfully saving him from falling.

“Daehwi!” Daniel calls out and after a few seconds, Daehwi opens his eyes.

“Hyung—“ Although upon seeing Jinyoung, Daehwi immediately scrambles to his feet and glares. “Jinyoung-hyung, what the hell are you doing here?”

Jinyoung already expected this kind of greeting, but it still doesn’t make his heart get any less hurt. He decides to ignore it however, as Daehwi is his priority at that moment, so he grabs the lad’s hand and tells him, “We’re leaving.”

Daehwi shrugs his hand off. “Who the hell do you think you are to tell me what to do? I won’t go with you.”

“Daehwi, let’s go—“

“Jinyoung,” Daniel interrupts, standing up as well and holding on to Daehwi’s other arm protectively. “Maybe you’re forgetting… but you have Jihoon.”

“What about me?” Jihoon approaches the three of them, looking all pale and utterly bewildered about the entire exchange. “Jinyoung, what’s going on?”

Jinyoung closes his eyes for a moment before he turns to look at Daniel pleadingly. “Hyung, please… just let me handle him.” Daniel looks very reluctant, but he eventually lets go of Daehwi. “Thank you. I’m sorry, I know I’m pushing my luck with this but can you please drop Jihoon off at his place? He drank a bit and I’m worried something might happen.”

“Jinyoung—“ Daniel stops and sighs before he nods. “Sure. Just explain everything later.”

Jinyoung smiles at Daniel, thankful for the trust given to him, but that smile is short lived once he sees Jihoon’s stumped face. It pains him to see the male looking back at him, searching for answers which he already knew but refuse to accept.

The fantasy that he keeps on holding; the reality that he wants to deny.

And it hurts more, how despite wanting to tell Jihoon everything, all Jinyoung could say was, “Jihoon, I’m…” he breathes. “I’m sorry.”

It takes Jinyoung his whole willpower to ignore the sheen on Jihoon’s eyes and pull Daehwi with him out of the establishment. This is what he chose, so he swallows down whatever crippling feelings of regret he has left and continues to move on.

Daehwi begs to differ however, as once they’re out of the restaurant, he shrugs Jinyoung’s hand off of him. “Let me go—“ he staggers though and almost loses balance but Jinyoung is quick to catch him. “Just leave me alone, will you?!” Daehwi shrieks, but Jinyoung isn’t about to take any of his complaints.

Without any warning, Jinyoung crouches down, pulls Daehwi’s arms over his shoulders and holds his legs in place, carrying the boy on his back. “If you don’t want to fall and crack your head, I suggest you stay put and let me carry you back.” Jinyoung starts walking and he feels the faintest gasp for air beside his ear but it soon turns naught, the silence overtaking them both.

Jinyoung surmises that it must be the work of the alcohol, but Daehwi miraculously listens and really stays still on his back. The way back to their dorms doesn’t even reach ten minutes, but it gives Jinyoung a sense of comfort knowing that Daehwi stopped fighting back, that the boy is actually letting him in his life again.

Or so he thought.

“Hyung,” Daehwi mumbles as soon as their rooms came to his sight. Jinyoung continues walking and only lets Daehwi down when the boy squirms right in front of his room. Jinyoung doesn’t let go of his hand though, afraid that Daehwi will trip and the latter smirks. “You want to have another round of shots?”

Jinyoung sighs, already knowing what is about to come. “Daehwi no, let’s get you inside—“

“No!” Daehwi retorts, slapping Jinyoung’s hand away. “I know you don’t like me, you have Jihoon-hyung—“

“Daehwi—“

“Don’t Daehwi me! I know you’re only doing this because you see your childhood friend in me,” Daehwi breathes out, leaning his back onto his room’s front door for support. “So stop doing whatever you are doing and leave me the fuck alone—“

Jinyoung towers over Daehwi and finishes his words with a kiss. Daehwi tries to push him away, but Jinyoung doesn’t budge. Instead, Jinyoung grabs Daehwi’s knuckles and holds them tightly, calming down the tremors of his hands.

And Daehwi stops fighting back, tears falling through as he lets Jinyoung hold him.

The kiss was quick and chaste – a peck with only their lips touching – yet every second felt so, so much more. Every second that they touch felt like forever.

“I’ll do it again.”

And he wants it to be forever.

Jinyoung wants to stay in that spell and just be smothered with all that is Daehwi.

“If you don’t want it, then push me. I’ll leave you alone for good.”

It was a risk, one that holds a lot of repercussions.

“If you do, then kiss me… and don’t hold back.”

A risk that he’s willing to take.

Daehwi stares back at him, rubbing away the tears on his face. Neither of them move for a moment, nor say anything to counter the silence. They both just look back at each other, eyes enraptured and caught in a trance.

And just when Jinyoung is about to step back and turn away, Daehwi pulls his arms and kisses him.

Fully and deeply.

Without holding back.

 

* * *

 

 

_“That’s unfair… you know my real name. What’s your real name then?”_

_“When my heart is ready, I will let you know my real name then.”_

Daehwi’s eyes shoot open, only to have it squint in pain, greeted by the sliver of light that managed to pass through the edge of the window curtain. He stares at the ceiling, trying to adjust his blurred vision as he tries to remember what day it is.

_Saturday._

Understanding that it was a day off, he closes his eyes again and decides to sleep in. The duvet felt so comfortable against his skin. Not to mention how warm it is, Daehwi feels as if he’s in midair, floating along with the clouds in utter comfort.

Yet for some reason, he’s being dragged and pulled by the waist, causing him to turn to his side and rest against something warm, smooth, but also hard. _This is not my pillow…_ Daehwi flutters his eyes open and sees the fine surface of a golden tanned skin. He breathes deeply, smells the woodsy cotton and musk scent – a very familiar scent he had come to love – and exhales in satisfaction, causing for him to hear a groan and feel the vibration near the person’s neck.

And he gets hugged tighter, closer than before – if any space would allow – as he feels something rested on top of his head. It was cramped, and Daehwi’s whole body feels confined being wrapped in an enclosed space, but he feels calm, extreme comfort despite the restrictedness.

He feels at peace, hearing the steady rhythm of a heartbeat.

So he wraps his arms around the figure back, just as tight as he was being hugged and snuggles further onto their neck, basking in the whiff he greatly loves.

_This is my ideal Saturday._

Daehwi’s about to fall asleep again when a sudden gnawing thought appears in his head.

_I don’t have a curtain in my room… nor do I have a roommate…_

Albeit unwilling to move away from the comfort of his position, Daehwi opens his eyes again and looks up, only to see none other than his dorm mate, Jinyoung, in a deep sleep beside him, small snores slipping through his slightly ajar mouth.

Daehwi had seen Jinyoung’s sleeping face for more than a dozen of times, of when he would still wake up the older for their morning classes, but every single time, he would still be amazed, enraptured, and captivated by his beauty. In contrast to the serious and stoic countenance that he usually wears, Jinyoung’s sleeping face is akin to that of a baby’s, pure and void of any malice. Daehwi isn’t saying this because he’s deeply in love (well his judgement is never really credible when it comes to Jinyoung) but he can definitely stay in bed with Jinyoung all day and just watch him sleep and it’ll be enough for him.

Despite the beautiful setup he’s in however, there’s one questionable thought that Daehwi suddenly realizes.

_I’m not supposed to be in bed with Jinyoung-hyung._

Daehwi blinks, even pinches himself to see if Jinyoung is just an image conjured by the longingness of his heart. Yet no matter how much he pinches himself, it’s still the same.

He can still feel pain.

“Oh my god—“ Daehwi almost chokes when he unconsciously pushes Jinyoung away from him, letting the latter fall off the bed. No one can blame him though, all alarms inside his head suddenly went off upon remembering that he shouldn’t be where he is.

Daehwi isn’t supposed to be anywhere near Jinyoung’s sphere.

Yet there he is, stunned and frozen, heart in an extreme anxiety as he watches Jinyoung emerge from the floor with a loud groan. Daehwi blinks, suddenly noticing a familiar pair of shirt and jeans on the dining table.

And he suddenly checks underneath the duvet to see what he was wearing – matching thick fluffy sweater and pants. _What the fuck—_ Daehwi racks his brain for any memories of the night prior to when he started losing his shit or if he ever had any recollection of buying such dull and hideous matching sweats at all in the past. The matching sweats look fairly familiar to an extent, yet no matter how much he forces himself to think and use his brain for that matter, he doesn’t get anything and instead, only comes up to a conclusion that:

One. He is not wearing his own clothes.

Two. He is not in his, Woojin’s nor Daniel’s room

Three. His fashion taste is still incomparable and never would he actually spend money on a gloomy and dismal matching pajamas.

And lastly, he is in Jinyoung’s room, wearing – most likely – the older’s clothes.

“Well, good morning there.” Jinyoung finally speaks, struggling to keep his balance as he sits up on the floor. “Looks like someone here woke up on the wrong side of the bed—“ Jinyoung gets cut off when Daehwi decks him with one of the pillows he was holding.

“Clearly, I woke up _on_ the wrong bed!” Daehwi was about to throw another one but Jinyoung is quick to take it away from him.

“Jesus Christ, can you just—“

“What?! Calm down?! Oh hell no, I won’t! Not after waking up on the wrong bed, in the wrong room and _wearing_ the wrong clothes!” Daehwi screams at him. “What the hell did you do last night?!”

“Nothing happened! I just changed your clothes because there’s vomit all over it!” Jinyoung grabs the shirt on the table and shoves it at him. “See! My shirt actually got dirtied too!”

Indeed, there are splotches all over it, and Daehwi actually feels a teeny tiny bit guilty of accusing Jinyoung wrongly (and also of having vile and corrupted thoughts), but that isn’t enough to convince him.

“That doesn’t explain why I’m here sleeping with you when my room is just next door!”

“Why would I send you back to your room when I know you’ll only run away from me again?” Jinyoung confesses. “I know I can be dumb but I’m not _that_ stupid to let you go again.”

_Thump. Thump._

Daehwi breathes heavily – a futile effort in calming his shaken heart – and attempts to punch Jinyoung but is immediately rendered immobile when the latter grasps his wrists. “What the—Bae Jinyoung, let me go!”

“What, so you can hit me again?” Jinyoung snaps. “So you can _run_ _away_ again?”

“Bae Jinyoung, I swear to God—“

Jinyoung pins Daehwi’s hands on the wall, kneels on the bed in front of him and gives him a smooch shamelessly. “What? You swear what?” Jinyoung whispers, lips hovering over Daehwi’s and causing for the latter to slowly lose strength and will to resist.

“I...” Daehwi mumbles, cheeks flushed and out of breath. He stares back at Jinyoung, sees his image reflected in the latter’s murky brown eyes, sees him biting on his moist cherry lips.

And Daehwi forgets everything else.

He shoves himself onto Jinyoung, reconnecting their lips and holding him like he’d never done before. They just woke up, both still in a daze and undone. Daehwi still had no recollection nor explanation to his current situation, yet everything felt so good.

Touching Jinyoung, holding him, kissing him, breathing him in felt so, so right.

It was what Daehwi wanted all this time, to be able to be within Jinyoung’s sphere and hold him like no one else does.

But someone else actually already _does._

Someone else has a more right to hold Jinyoung in a way that Daehwi _shouldn’t_.

Daehwi pulls away all of a sudden and Jinyoung eyes him in worry. “Daehwi, what’s—“

“Jinyoung-hyung, we… we shouldn’t…”

Daehwi sees Jinyoung’s eyes waver, as if hesitant and conflicted. They stay silent for a moment, both gauging, thinking of the right words to say. But Jinyoung breaks the ice first when he chuckles and ruffles Daehwi’s hair.

“You’re right, we shouldn’t be doing this…”

Daehwi hears the sound of his heart breaking.

“We just woke up. I bet my breath stinks… I’m sorry.”

Or maybe not.

“It’s already almost noon, we kind of slept in, huh.” Jinyoung looks at the wall clock before standing up and pulling Daehwi with him. “You can go wash up first, I’ll prepare lunch for us.”

“But, that’s not—“

“Oh, unless you want to continue where we left off? Hm?” Daehwi blushes furiously, seeing the smirk on Jinyoung’s face. He punches Jinyoung’s arm as a petty comeback, but the male only laughs. He grabs Daehwi’s right hand and raises his arm, eyeing the boy’s body up and down before nodding in satisfaction. “You really look good in my clothes. That matching sweats are the ones you changed me into when I was sick.”

Daehwi remembers, and finds it amusing, realizing that the sweats did look familiar. Jinyoung, in turn, just sighs in liking as he stares at the boy fondly. “Maybe it’s better if you don’t wash up after all? I like seeing you like this.”

If Daehwi thought he can’t get any redder, well he’s definitely wrong. It’s as if Jinyoung’s releasing all of his hidden cards all at the same time that Daehwi can’t help but be conscious through and through. Then again, it’s Jinyoung and no matter what the male does, Daehwi is weak against it.

Daehwi’s weakness is Jinyoung after all.

“Okay… I’ll wash up first.” Daehwi then tugs the hem of Jinyoung’s shirt. “What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Aren’t you going to wash up too?”

“I will, after lunch, maybe?” The smirk on Jinyoung’s face resurfaces. “Unless you’re implying something else… like washing up together—“

“What the hell?”

“Not like I haven’t seen it before… like last night for that matter—“

“Okay, that’s it. See you later, Mr. Bae Jinyoung!” Daehwi dashes off to the bathroom and immediately undresses himself. From the bathroom he could clearly hear Jinyoung’s laughter but it soon gets drowned out by the din coming from the shower water pelting against his skin.

Daehwi’s happy. He’s really happy.

Waking up beside Jinyoung, talking to him without caring about what other people would think, looking at him and only him, he felt so liberated. Daehwi felt so free. After trying to avoid it for so long, to escape his feelings and then finally facing it without inhibitions, it never felt so, so good.

Granted, Jihoon’s image never fails to reappear at the back of his head, and he’s basically breaking a relationship – something he’d least want – but he’s far in too deep. It’s not like he can control his feelings, much less dictate it.

Daehwi’s human too. He just fell in love and even he feels pain because of it.

“If only I had met you earlier… then maybe I would be in his place.”

Once Daehwi’s done washing up, he realizes he forgot to ask Jinyoung for a change of clothes. He contemplated asking for his clothes the night prior, but he sees Jinyoung’s dull, hideous matching sweats and decides to wear it again.

It still is ugly to him, but there’s one fleeting thought that wills him to use it.

_When will I get the chance to be in this place again?_

He goes out of the bathroom and is greeted by the fragrance of the kimchi fried rice wafting around the whole unit, rousing his stomach to grumble in hunger. Jinyoung laughs at this whereas Daehwi frowns in response. Before he can completely take a seat though, Jinyoung suddenly pulls him in for a hug, breathing in and kissing his head. “You smell really nice.”

“Of course, you’d think it’s nice. It’s your shampoo.”

“Yeah, I like the fact that not only are you wearing my clothes but you also smell like me.” Jinyoung grins at him proudly. “Just you standing like this screams of ‘Bae Jinyoung’s Lee Daehwi! Isn’t that nice?”

Daehwi snorts, stopping himself from giggling like a mad man and pushes Jinyoung away with little to no effort (since of course, he doesn’t really want to part). “Go away, you haven’t washed yet!” Jinyoung chuckles as he lets go and the two of them finally start on their lunch. Daehwi follows up however, with a comment. “Although, it should be ‘Lee Daehwi’s Bae Jinyoung’. That sounds nicer.”

Daehwi wiggles his head excitedly as he bites on a spoonful of the fried rice. As expected, it isn’t the best he had tasted, but it’s definitely still his favorite. He was about to take another spoonful but stops midair when he notices Jinyoung staring at him.

“What?” he asks.

Jinyoung shakes his head. “Nothing. Yeah, let’s go with whatever you want.” He smiles as he says, “Lee Daehwi’s Bae Jinyoung.”

Daehwi suddenly feels like crying, unable to determine whether if it’s because of the rich taste of the fried rice or just the pureness of Jinyoung’s brown eyes, almost disappearing through the crescents brought about by his smile.

But Daehwi apparently is a masochist and loves to ruin every happy moment that he could ever have by bringing up the name that keeps on hanging in between them. “Jinyoung-hyung, about last night… Jihoon-sunbae…”

Jinyoung stills, motionless as he holds on to his bowl and spoon. Once he swallows down the food in his mouth, he looks at Daehwi and says, “You know, I just confirmed last night that you were actually my childhood friend.” He takes on another spoonful while Daehwi just watches him idly, a tad bothered by the fact that the male just ignored his words.

“Oh, is that so…” Daehwi mumbles, returning to his food, deeming that Jinyoung didn’t want to talk about the night prior. Although, realizing what Jinyoung just said, Daehwi blinks rapidly and looks at him in confusion. “Wait, what.” He questions, but it only comes out as a statement, too confused and doubtful of Jinyoung’s words. “I’m your…?”

“You’re my childhood friend, Daehyun.” Jinyoung announces nonchalantly. “But turns out that your real name is Daehwi.”

Daehwi, on the other hand, just gets even more confused. “Wait, how did you confirm this? Also, what do you mean Daehyun? Who’s Daehyun? I’m so confused right now, to be honest. I—“ Daehwi stops when Jinyoung just laughs at him. “Come on, I’m serious.”

“I am too.” Jinyoung smiles. “While I was changing your clothes last night, I accidentally came across your wallet. I’m sorry for touching it, but because of that I was able to see the picture that you were talking about before… that was the picture I gave you back when we were in grade 6.” Daehwi’s breathing hitches, but he continues to listen nonetheless. “As for Daehyun, it’s just a fake name you gave me when we first met. Even back then, you’ve always been naughty.” Jinyoung shakes his head.

“Is that why you didn’t recognize me the first time we met in uni?” Daehwi asks.

“That is one of the reasons… but it’s more of like one of the things that I used to delude myself into thinking that you aren’t him.” Jinyoung hums, setting his spoon down, already done with eating. “Things that aren’t worth going back to.”

Daehwi takes a bite out of the last spoonful he has before carefully setting his spoon as well. He stays silent, takes his time into munching on his food and even when he’s done, he only stares back at Jinyoung, who had only been watching him all this time. “How come you seem so casual about everything?” Jinyoung raises an eyebrow at his question, but Daehwi continues. “I mean, you said I suddenly left and you were deeply hurt by that. Shouldn’t you be mad because I just disappeared?”

Jinyoung reaches for Daehwi’s fingers and caresses it, brushing his thumb against the latter’s fingers gently. “I felt a lot of things when you disappeared. I was sad, angry, confused, but I was mostly hurt and I won’t deny that… yet all of those suddenly didn’t matter the instant that I realized you are really back.” He gets up, kneels in front of Daehwi and cups his face. “Daehwi, you came back to me. You’re here beside me… and that’s all that matters.”

Daehwi holds Jinyoung’s hands on his face and closes his eyes, keeping the tears from falling and relishing in the warmth he’s currently receiving. He doesn’t speak, deeming no words are enough to keep him from falling even further and only smiles, allowing himself to be submerged at that moment where it’s only Jinyoung and him.  

The rest of the afternoon keeps both Daehwi and Jinyoung busy as they watch a movie on the latter’s laptop while they cuddle in bed (as per Jinyoung’s request). Despite being the one who suggested watching a movie though (Frozen – again, as per Jinyoung’s request), Jinyoung apparently had other plans aside from watching the said movie. At least thirty minutes within the movie, from just sitting right beside Daehwi with his arms rested on the younger’s shoulder, Jinyoung’s arms suddenly snaked down and wrapped themselves onto the younger’s waist. After that, his head had suddenly moved onto Daehwi’s shoulder. If Jinyoung thought he was being subtle, then he is greatly mistaken. But Daehwi didn’t say anything about it and instead, just laughed inwardly at how the male was acting like a cat asking for attention.

It’s cute. Very cute. And Daehwi loves every moment of it.

Until he suddenly begins feeling warm on his neck, becomes ticklish when he feels a steady breathing against it. He ignores it and tries to focus on how Elsa’s making her ice castle, but it doesn’t last long. Not when Jinyoung completely drops his phony subtlety and begins blatantly kissing Daehwi’s neck – even going as far as to nip his skin at that.

“Jinyoung-hyung, what the hell are you doing.” Daehwi utters, covering and stopping Jinyoung’s whole face with his hand. “I’ve been trying to ignore it for a while now but—“ Daehwi stops when Jinyoung suddenly closes his laptop. He removes Daehwi’s hand on his face and quickly keeps his laptop and table away. Daehwi only looks at him in confusion. “What are you—“

Jinyoung doesn’t reply though and just walks back to Daehwi and proceeds to claim the latter’s lips as if it were his own. Despite being surprised by the male’s actions, Daehwi just closes his eyes and encircles his arms around Jinyoung’s neck, pulling him closer towards him. It was sweet and chaste, yet Daehwi’s heart is in turmoil, frenzied by the various emotions running through him.

And it only heightens more when Jinyoung suddenly goes on top of him, holds on to Daehwi’s waist and bites his lips, causing for the latter to gasp in between their kiss. Jinyoung takes this chance to move past Daehwi’s lips in a haste to reach each and every part of him, to meet his core.

Daehwi’s hands roam around Jinyoung’s hair, feeling each and every soft strand before holding his face in an attempt to even deepen their kiss, wanting to convey the feelings of which words can’t. Daehwi feels so many things at once that he can’t help but be weakened, melting into Jinyoung’s lips.

Yet Jinyoung’s presence alone continues to breathe life into each and every part of Daehwi’s soul. 

Their passionate lip lock lasts for a moment, both ardently in need for more of each other’s touch, but Daehwi soon runs out of breathe and pulls away, giggling when Jinyoung follows after his lips on reflex. “Calm down, seriously—“ Jinyoung cuts Daehwi off by giving him another amorous smooch.

Daehwi gives him a look but Jinyoung only laughs. “I can never be calm when you’re here beside me.” Jinyoung pants as he lays right beside Daehwi and pulls him closer, embracing his small frame tightly before placing a kiss on his forehead.

“I love you, Daehwi, so, so much.”

Daehwi had always dreamed of it, of cooking, eating, lazing around at home by watching movies, cuddling, sleeping, and waking up each day, all together with the person he loves. It was wishful thinking, and a fleeting thought for something so domestic and natural to happen, but being able to experience it himself never felt so gratifying and fulfilling. It was doubtful and also so foreign, as he was not used to having things go his way.

Yet being with Jinyoung and hearing the words he had long wanted to hear, Daehwi’s heart jumps in utter bliss. And he feels himself tearing up, overwhelmed by the happiness he’s receiving.

Overwhelmed by the thought of that happiness _ending_.

“Jinyoung-hyung, I’ve waited so long for this… I’ve waited so long to be able to hold you, to… to be with you,” Daehwi hugs Jinyoung tighter, nuzzling the latter’s neck, breathing in his scent, before staring at him with his tearful eyes.  “But we both know that we can’t run away… we can’t keep on doing this.”

Jinyoung rests his forehead against Daehwi’s and cups his face. “I know, I’m sorry… but can’t we just stay like this?” he stares at Daehwi’s eyes in desperation. “Please, until the end of this day… let me love you.”

Daehwi closes his eyes and wishes for time to stop. He wants to stay in that spell, in that certain sphere where only he and Jinyoung matter, where _no one else_ matters.

Yet time doesn’t stop just because he wants it to. Time doesn’t simply stop for anybody.

And reality is still the same.

_You are still not mine._

Daehwi flutters his eyes open – bright and clear – without any inhibitions and with a smile on his face, he whispers, “I love you too.”

Even for the last time, Daehwi will allow himself to love and be loved.  


	10. Beautiful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Promises are always meant to be broken for not everything is always what they seem to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for 2Park. scream at me whenever

[Beautiful](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MRhXzmgbT1w)

* * *

 

 

_“Jinyoung-ah,”_

_“Hm?”_

_“I’m going to university next month.”_

_“Yeah, 30 days to your college debut.”_

_“Good thing I passed, huh.”_

_“Yeah, congratulations.”_

_“Thanks but… will you still be with me?”_

_Jinyoung stops fiddling with his phone and looks back at Jihoon. “Do you even have to ask that?”_

_“Oh, I don’t know… maybe you’ll see someone, maybe I’ll see someone,” Jihoon shrugs. “Nobody knows what the future exactly holds.”_

_Jinyoung locks his phone and keeps it, giving all of his undivided attention to Jihoon. “You’ll just be there ahead of me by a year.” He smiles. “I’ll study hard so I’ll be accepted to your university and then we can go to classes together.”_

_“You do realize that I’m a year older than you, right?”_

_“Oh yeah…” Jinyoung mumbles. “But I’ll try to be with you as much as I can, I promise.”_

_“Yeah?”_

_“Definitely. Don’t you have faith in me?”_

_Jihoon laughs, seeing Jinyoung’s pouting lips. He stays silent for a moment, before he touches the younger’s face and smiles._

_“If there ever comes a day when we’ll need to separate, please don’t take the initiative to do it.” Jihoon tells him. “Promise me you won’t.”_

Jinyoung remembers it vividly in his head, the last day of Jihoon wearing the same uniform as him. That day, contrary to their usual routine of watching a movie or playing games, Jihoon and Jinyoung actually went out to have fun. They went out to play in the arcade, watched a movie in the theaters, and even splurged on food. If Jinyoung’s being honest, he still really doesn’t like roaming outside too much and would much rather spend time indoors, but it was Jihoon’s last day of being a high school student. And Jinyoung, to the best of his abilities – even if it’s against his interests – wants to make it special and allow Jihoon to make the most out of his youth.

Since high school was important to the two of them; high school was when they first met.

High school was also when they first made their promise to each other.

The promise of being together.

Agreed and kept mutually, despite knowing that promises are always meant to be broken.

10:15

5 minutes after their agreed time, Jinyoung becomes even more restless. The following Monday after he had left the gopchang place with Daehwi, Jinyoung finally contacted Jihoon to meet up. Surprisingly, not once did Jinyoung receive any messages nor calls from Jihoon over the weekend, and he doesn’t even know whether to be relived or not.

Relieved because he was able to spend time with Daehwi without worrying about anything else.

Unrelieved because… how can he when a person so special to him is hurting because of him?

He knows that he can’t run away forever. One can only take so much before they have enough and eventually break.

And Jinyoung doesn’t want that. He can’t risk losing every happy memory he has with Jihoon. He can’t risk losing not just a boyfriend or a friend, but also a brother.

He can’t risk losing Jihoon.

_I can’t risk hurting him even more… even though I already did._

Jinyoung stirs his cup of coffee, staring idly as the chocolate whisks slowly fade into the hot espresso. Despite the chocolate melting into his beverage however, it doesn’t make the coffee any bit sweeter. He only sighs, putting the cup gently back on top of the coaster and just takes comfort in how it at least made him warmer in comparison to the sullen and cold atmosphere of the rainy weather.

Very in contrast to how warm and cozy it felt when he and Jihoon had their first date there.

“What got you so down in the dumps?”

Jinyoung snaps out of his trance when he sees a shadow casting over the marble white table, followed by the very familiar voice of the one he was waiting for.

“Jihoon.”

Jinyoung sucks in a breath, and Jihoon just laughs. “You…” he pauses. “Why do you seem so tense? What’s the matter?”

Jihoon smiles as usual, and Jinyoung couldn’t be any more restless. The fact that despite all of what happened, Jihoon’s still like the usual surprises a part of Jinyoung and it makes him question himself, of whether he actually knew the male or not.

Of whether he actually knew everything about Jihoon or not.

“Nothing, I was just surprise you’re late.”

“Well, I woke up late. You know how I am.” Jihoon chuckles before he grabs a hold of the menu. “It’s been a while since we last came here. Do you remember what I ordered ‘cause I actually don’t.”

Jinyoung stares at Jihoon, watches him flip the pages absentmindedly.

Sees his hands trembling. Notices him biting his lips.

Only then does Jinyoung understand.

_Jihoon is still the same old Jihoon and maybe it was me who changed._

“I actually ordered what you got when we first went to this place.”

Jihoon raises an eyebrow and looks at the cup of coffee Jinyoung pushed to him. “Espresso? I actually bought espresso?” Jihoon takes the cup and smells its aroma before giving it a taste. “Are you sure you weren’t the one who ordered it instead of me?”

“I ordered hot chocolate before actually.” Jinyoung puts on a small smile. “See, you’re the one who doesn’t remember.”

“Then why did you order this now?”

Jinyoung ponders, taps his fingers gently on the table and responds, “I don’t know really.” he answers. “I just felt like even if I order hot chocolate now… I—“

“It’s still going to be a bitter end… you’re still going to break your promise.”

10:20

A lull silence looms over them both with only the faint music from the café playing in the background. It was nearing noontime and the café crowd is slowly picking up. Despite the hustling noise of the café goers however, Jinyoung doesn’t hear anything but the hushed sound of Jihoon drinking as well as the pitter-patter of the rain.

Yet it doesn’t give any bit of help to calm Jinyoung’s heart.

Jinyoung already expected it, how Jihoon would already be aware of the reason why he suddenly asked to meet up. It was no brainer to anybody after he just suddenly left the scene with Daehwi in his arms. If it was another person, they would’ve already screamed and maybe wrecked Jinyoung entirely since it was indeed a blatant act of disrespect and affair.

But the other person is Jihoon.

Even as Jinyoung already expected the whole confrontation, it didn’t prepare him enough for it. He thought he would be, but the truth is, he will never be for Jihoon doesn’t deserve it.

Jihoon doesn’t deserve the mistreatment. Jihoon doesn’t deserve the pain.

And no matter how many times Jinyoung tries to go about it, nothing can still validate or reason out his actions.

In the end, he still hurt and _will_ hurt Jihoon.

“Jihoon…”

10:22

“I already knew it the moment you left last Friday… and I would be lying if I said that I didn’t hope I was wrong.” Jihoon puts his cup down and says, “Well, if I think about it properly, I already had a hunch the moment I saw you talking to Daehwi during the first few weeks of school.”

“What… what do you mean you had a hunch?” Jinyoung asks.

“You don’t talk to anybody, Jinyoung. You never did, which is why I was surprised back then.” Jihoon smiles. “Then again, you talk to other people now. You’ve broaden your sphere.”

“It’s not… well, I’m trying, I guess.”

10:23

Jihoon breathes heavily as he says, “You’ve become a lot brighter, Jinyoung.”

Jinyoung mumbles, “I… I’m not…”

“Yes, you did.” Jihoon smiles. “And it’s not because of me.”

10:24

It was faint, but Jinyoung can almost hear the tremor in Jihoon’s voice, could almost see the sheen of growing tears in his eyes and he almost loses the will to drop the words he’d been meaning to say.

Almost loses the will to do what he’d been meaning to for a long time now.

“Jihoon, I… I’m sorry.” Jinyoung closes his eyes and breathes. “I—“ but before he can even break the words, Jihoon cuts him off.

“Please don’t.” Jihoon closes his eyes as the tears that have been pooling finally fall. “Please don’t do it… please don’t break up with me.”

10:25

Jinyoung hears his heart slowly breaking with each second that he sees Jihoon’s tears yet he knows that he has to do it. He has to let go if he wants the two of them to move on.

“Jihoon, it’s not working anymore… and you know it too.” Jinyoung almost chokes as he stares at Jihoon’s tear stained face, but he continues nonetheless. “It’s not even only about me. We both know that we’re not each other’s priorities now.”

“I know… I know that, but if we really have to do this… then at least complete your promise.”

_“I’ll take the blame. I’ll break up with you for the two of us.”_

Jihoon wipes his face as he bites his lips and Jinyoung almost wants to sit beside him and just take him in his arms, but he knows that it won’t change anything. It won’t help either of them.

So he just stays put and watches as Jihoon slowly calm down. “At least let me be the one to break it up between us.” Jihoon almost chokes as he speaks, but he still manages to put on a smile when he says, “I know I’m pushing my luck by asking you this, but I don’t want my first relationship to be me being dumped, haha.”

Jinyoung knows Jihoon’s forcing himself to laugh; he’s always been like that. But Jinyoung only smiles and nods.

10:28

Jihoon straightens up on his seat once he’s settled down.

“Jinyoung,”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

10:29

“But let’s break up.”

10:30

It was inevitable, Jinyoung knows. He knows it was what they were about to do, it was what he needs to do, yet it doesn’t lessen the pain. It hurts, not only for Jihoon, but also for him.

But until the end, he would give it to Jihoon. He would complete his promise because that’s what Jihoon deserves.

“Thank you.” Jinyoung answers in response and Jihoon laughs.

“I just broke up with you and you’re thanking me.”

“I just want to thank you… for everything.”

Jihoon stares at Jinyoung for a moment and stands up to take the seat beside Jinyoung. “The moment I asked you to go out with me, I already knew that I was only borrowing you. You were not mine to begin with and I’m glad that you found where you truly belong.”

_“I love you, but even if I didn’t, I know that I’ll still grow to love you.”_

Jinyoung remembers it clearly, Jihoon’s words before. He can perfectly hear Jihoon saying it in his head, but he doesn’t voice it out. He keeps it to himself and just smiles in return.

“We’ll still be friends, right?” Jinyoung asks.

“Of course. Don’t worry about me. I…” Jihoon sucks in a breath before he smiles. “I’m happy with Woojin… so you should be happy with Daehwi too.”

Jinyoung rubs Jihoon’s hand with his thumb and nods. “I definitely will… for you.”

Jinyoung feels Jihoon squeezing his hand as his eyes turn glassy once more. “Ji—“ Yet before he can even ask what’s wrong, he feels Jihoon’s lips on his. It was very quick, just a short peck, yet it still manages to make Jinyoung’s heart race in utter surprise, and in a few seconds, he hears the older chuckling.

“I’ll definitely miss you… and your lips.” Jihoon stands up nonchalantly, ignoring Jinyoung’s aghast face. “Don’t worry, what Daehwi doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” he winks. He then looks at his watch for a moment before he says, “I… I’m going first, if you don’t mind.” He pulls Jinyoung for a tight hug and whispers, “I’ll miss you a lot. The next time we see each other, we’ll just be bros.”

Jinyoung sees Jihoon’s smile and he does the same.

_I’ve loved you, and I probably would always have even if we were not meant to be… for love itself will always be loved._

_You will always love, and you will always be loved._

“Until then.”

 

* * *

 

“Everything looks good.” Their literature professor, Ong Seongwu, flips through the pages, scanning the contents. “I must say I’m impressed. Is this the work of love?”

“Huh?”

“Where’s your partner anyway? Why are you the only one submitting this?” Mr. Ong closes the folder and gives Daehwi a look. “Where’s your boyfriend, Bae Jinyoung-gun?”

Daehwi coughs hard. Mr. Ong just cackles.

While Seongwu’s a respected professor in the faculty of arts despite him being a lenient and carefree one, sometimes, just sometimes, Daehwi still doubts his credibility as an adult. Not because he’s irresponsible or anything of the like, but apparently, he takes more interest in the lives of others including Daehwi’s.

“H-he’s not my boyfriend, sir.”

It’s not something that puts him off however.

“Ey, no need to be so coy! Or is that what you young ones do nowadays? No labels?”

If Daehwi’s being honest, what ticks him off is how Seongwu himself is acting like a teenager in denial of having a crush with his arch nemesis, Hwang Minhyun, when it’s actually an open secret to everybody how their relationship moves back and forth between punching each other’s guts or making out in the faculty room.

But Daehwi digresses. If any, he shouldn’t even be stressing himself with other people’s love lives when he himself couldn’t fix his.

That doesn’t mean that he’ll give up a good chance to throw a strike however.

“Isn’t that what you and Mr. Hwang have been doing since… oh I don’t know… forever?”

Not when the appalled look on Mr. Ong’s face is just plain amusing.

“W-what… I—“

“Oh, would you look at that! Time for lunch!” Daehwi chirps, pointing to the wall clock of the faculty room.

“Wait—“

Before Seongwu can even retort, Daehwi immediately cuts him off by putting on a wide grin. “See you next semester, Mr. Ong!”

He ignores the rest of his professor’s words, only catching the word ‘brat’ in the process. It was the end of the first semester and he wouldn’t give his professor the luxury to take up his time when he could be doing other more productive things like sleeping in or maybe cleaning his room (which he hasn’t done in a while).

Or maybe go to the Church and pray while waiting for whatever may happen between Jinyoung and Jihoon.

He knew that the two having a talk was inevitable, and that sooner or later, Jinyoung has to come up with a decision himself. Daehwi didn’t pry nor ask of what he had decided upon as it was his own struggle to defeat. Jinyoung and Jihoon’s story is something that only the two of them can finish and Daehwi, as much as he hates it, is out of that discussion.

_“I’ll see you later?”_

Daehwi hears Jinyoung’s voice in his head, sees his face, smile all bright and warm in contrast to the gloomy weather. When Daehwi found out that Jinyoung was about to meet up with Jihoon, he need not to think twice about submitting their paper by himself. They had an agreement that they would submit it together, but Daehwi wouldn’t want to stay at his dorm by himself and be holed up, thinking, wondering, _stressing_ , on what might be happening.

Yet even as he did go out of his dorm room, got distracted a bit by Seongwu’s whims, wasted time by idling around the corridors of their department, there are still conflicting thoughts gnawing inside his head.

_What if I’m not good enough for him? What if Jihoon-sunbae didn’t accept Woojin-hyung after all? What if Jinyoung-hyung realized that he would be better off with Jihoon-sunbae after all?_

_What if later… becomes never?_

“Daehwi?”

The silence of the hallway should’ve given Daehwi more room to think and rationalize himself, yet it only proves to be even harder as not only can he hear his name being called but he’s also seeing Jihoon himself approaching in the far distance.

Daehwi just heaves a heavy sigh.

“I’m really hallucinating—“

“Yo Daehwi, why aren’t you answering me?”

Daehwi flinches when he feels a hand on his shoulders. “Sunbae?!” he says a tad too loudly as he jumps up from his seat and looks back at Jihoon in shock. “W-what—why are you here?”

“Oh I just met up with Jinyoung.” Jihoon says casually and it takes a whole lot of effort for Daehwi’s face to stay passive as he hears the name. “I’m on the way to submit Woojin and my report.”

“Is that so?” Daehwi mumbles, barely inaudible despite the silence surrounding them.

“I actually wanted to talk to you too,” Says Jihoon, and Daehwi swallows hard. “About Jinyoung.”

Daehwi instantly panics, mind blanking out at the impending confrontation. “W-what about?” he manages to ask. Jihoon just stares at him for a few lull seconds before Daehwi sees his hands moving and on instinct, he closes his eyes, waits for the impact on his face, gut or wherever he is a suitable punching bag.

But none came. Jihoon doesn’t slap him, punch him, hit him or any of the things that Daehwi expects him to do.

Instead, Jihoon pulls him and hugs him tightly, chin anchored on Daehwi’s shoulder blades.

“Jinyoung doesn’t like bitter drinks. He likes sweet stuff like hot chocolate.”

“Sunbae—“

“Jinyoung likes eating homemade food, but I’m not a good cook so he always tends to cook himself. If you’re just the same as me who has nonexistent cooking skills, then make sure to always compliment him. Jinyoung doesn’t say anything but he likes it a lot when he’s complimented.”

“Hyung…”

“Jinyoung likes skinships. A _lot_.” Jihoon laughs. “I never did it much with him before but he likes cuddling more than anything. He likes feeling skin against his when he sleeps. He likes the warmth.” Jihoon pulls away from the hug and smiles. “You know that, right?”

Daehwi only stares at him back, unsure whether he should even respond or not. Apparently, Jihoon isn’t oblivious and notices his conflicted thoughts.

“But of course, kisses before cuddles.” Jihoon smirks. “I’m sure this you cannot deny.”

Daehwi sucks in a breath, internally panicking at the sudden statement. Although he finds solace in the fact that there’s only a smile on Jihoon’s face, void of any guile and deceit. And without actually meaning to, Daehwi finds himself nodding slowly, feeling his cheeks heating up.

“No need to hide these things from me, you dummy.” Says Jihoon as he chuckles amusedly. Daehwi, despite a tad peeved by the fact that Jihoon’s blatantly laughing at him, only remains silent in response. More than being confused as well, the nervousness overshadows everything.

“I…” he trails off, finding the words stuck in his mouth. “I’m…”

He wants to say sorry for seeing Jinyoung, for meeting him. He wants to say sorry for befriending him, for getting close to him.

He wants to say sorry for appearing in Jihoon and Jinyoung’s lives. He wants to say sorry for getting in between their relationship.

Yet in the end he closes his mouth and doesn’t say anything. He swallows the words that had been meaning to come out for he knows it deep inside of him that he isn’t really sorry. He knows that he should be for all this time he has been selfish, that all he thought of was claiming his love even at the expense of another.  

But how can he feel sorry when it’s what his heart wants all this time? How can he feel sorry for being finally happy?

Daehwi will never be sorry for being human. He will never be sorry for being in love.

_I’ll never be sorry for loving Jinyoung._

He _is_ sorry though for hurting Jihoon.

“If you’re planning to say sorry, then just save it for when you hurt him.”

Daehwi’s eyes flicker as he hears Jihoon’s words, uncertain of whether he heard the older male correctly. “W-what?”

“Not that I’m saying that it’s okay to hurt him – of course, I hope you won’t – but just save your apology for him.” Jihoon says. “Save all of your thoughts, words, and feelings for Jinyoung.”

He then puts on a sad smile as he says, “Give him everything that I wasn’t able to.”

Daehwi feels a lump forming at the edge of his throat, feels Jihoon’s hands trembling a bit as he holds on to his shoulder. The weight of Jihoon’s words lingers against his chest, heavier than any wish he had ever received.

Yet at the same time, it was also gratifying, as if being free from the guilt he had been carrying deep within him. As if finally receiving the only blessing that matters to him, to Jinyoung, and to their relationship.

And without any hesitation, with a very solid resolution, he answers.

“I’ll give my _everything_ to Jinyoung because that’s what he deserves.”

Jihoon breathes heavily and nods, squeezing Daehwi’s shoulder fondly. “I’ve always thought you were a bright kid. I guess I wasn’t wrong.”

“Thank you, sunbae.” Daehwi puts on a small smile in response.

“Sunbae? Stop calling me sunbae, it’s so weird. Just call me hyung.”

Seeing Jihoon’s expectant gaze, Daehwi nods. “Thank you Jihoon-hyung.” He then bites his lips, both nervous and restless as he remembers the thought that has been gnawing at the back of his mind ever since before. “So uhm, about Woojin-hyung…”

Jihoon, on the other hand, cuts him off when he suddenly takes a look at his watch. “Oops, sorry but I gotta go. I need to submit a paper for Mr. Ong before he leaves.”

“Oh, yeah. He’s still in the faculty room though so you might want to hurry up.” Daehwi tells him as Jihoon nods in understanding.

“Well then, I guess I’ll see you two around?”

“Definitely—“ Daehwi stops when Jihoon suddenly claps his hand, remembering a sudden thought. “What’s wrong?” he asks.

“I forgot one thing,” Before Daehwi can even question him, he suddenly feels Jihoon’s hands on his face, followed by the older’s lips pressing on his. Jihoon kisses Daehwi for a few seconds before he quickly backs away with a smirk. “Thank you for returning to Jinyoung’s life, Daehwi.”

Daehwi blinks. “I-I—“ he stutters, fumbling on his words as he tries to control his very much flabbergasted expression.

Yet despite the very evident distress shown on his face, Jihoon only gives him a sly smile before leaning in to his ear to whisper, “Don’t worry, what Jinyoung doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”

And without any other word, Jihoon proceeds to saunter out of the scene, leaving Daehwi utterly speechless and breathless with what just transpired.

_WHAT. JUST. HAPPENED._

He slaps himself hard, trying to believe that it was just his imagination, yet the stinging pain on his cheek tells him otherwise. “That fucking hurts—“ but before he can do it once more, a hand suddenly grabs ahold of his wrist, and he flinches in shock.

“What the hell are you doing?”

Daehwi turns to his side and sees Woojin’s concerned expression, most likely doubting his sanity (then again, even _he_ is doubting his reason). But more than the state of his mental health, a much more crucial matter is at stake, an imperative answer to the complete progress of his deranged mind.

“Hyung! Jihoon-sun—I mean Jihoon-hyung just kissed me!” Daehwi blurts out, eyes wide in guilt as he continues, “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to. He just suddenly kissed me and I know you two are—“

“Not together.”

“—not together and—“ Daehwi stops, eyebrows furrowing. “What?”

Woojin raises his eyebrows. “What what?”

“Not together?”

“ _Not_ together.”

“But didn’t you tell me you were gonna…” Daehwi trails off, his thoughts going off road as he stares at Woojin, who surprisingly, looks very much nonchalant about the whole situation.

“What?” asks Woojin.

Daehwi stares more at him, tries to see any opening, any sliver of doubt and pretense, but ultimately decides to drop his case when he notices how Woojin’s smile never reach his ears. Woojin’s knuckles contract and even as his face shows impassiveness, Daehwi knows him more than what the older thinks he does.

It was something clearly visible yet at the same time, hazy and incomprehensible.

All this time he was sure of what’s happening, sure of what’s he’s been seeing.

But then life proves him wrong.  

One would think they know everything, one would think they got everything sorted out, but reality stays the same.

Not everything is always what they seem to be.

“It’s… it’s nothing.” Daehwi decides as an answer, putting on a small smile.

Woojin taps his shoulder and nods. “Then I’ll go first. I still have dance practice.” He walks away and makes a salute without looking back. “Contact me if something’s up.”

Daehwi just nods before parting and going on his own way, disregarding the heaviness in his heart.

Much like how the clouds are floating freely in the sky, Daehwi can’t do anything but allow the aftermath to flow by themselves.

It was beyond his control.

Daehwi prayed for it, had hoped for their different ending.

But perhaps theirs will never be the same.

Theirs is instead, meant for another beginning.

_There are all kinds of love in this world… but never the same love twice._


	11. 12th Star

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _I'll always be with you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 11 chapters for 11 stars !
> 
> It's been a tough ride!  
> I wrote this simply for a friend but managed to get more in the process and I'll always be grateful to the lot of you who stayed with me until the end.  
> Back last year I told myself I'll finish this before the D, but unfortunately life happened and I'm only finishing it now.  
> But all's well that ends well!
> 
> I have more plots in mind and am in the process of writing the outlines but I'm not exactly sure if I'll push along with those.  
> I'll be going on 2 trips this year and am preparing for those so I might be busier than ever. I hope I can still write though since I don't think I'll ever forget JinHwi.
> 
> But as long as there's at least 1 person who would want to read more JinHwi stories, then I won't stop writing.  
> I've yet to learn a lot so I'll take it as a challenge!
> 
> Again, thank you for staying with me and JinHwi until the end.  
> You have all been very lovely and I appreciate your time taking to read my work.  
> I hope in the future we can all see each other again. 
> 
> Let's meet again when the Spring Breeze passes!  
> XOXO

Epilogue

[12th Star](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MqVY7mMMioc)

* * *

 

 

Daehwi doesn’t remember if he has ever been to Busan before. He doesn’t remember ever seeing Haeundae beach up close, the place being surrounded by various booths ranging from clothing stores, to games, to food stalls. He doesn’t remember seeing it in pictures, brightly lit with various sizes of colorful lanterns hanging on trees, seemingly looking as if they were floating in mid-air. He doesn’t remember hearing it from his mom or friends, of how loud and festive music from improvised stages ruled the entire shoreline. 

Then again, he doesn’t remember anything prior to his accident for that matter.

That doesn’t mean that he’s lacking however.

If Daehwi’s being honest, he doesn’t really feel the need to remember since he had just been living fine. Although he can’t help but wonder how it would feel to have memories of the past, of being able to see images replaying at the back of his head whenever he sees something familiar, of being able to feel dejavu when he unconsciously reacts differently in a situation all too vague in his head.

Daehwi doesn’t really mind not remembering any of his memories. Yet seated somewhere in the more secluded area of the stone staircase near the Haeundae beach, overlooking all of the bright lights and festivities, Daehwi begins to think otherwise.

“I don’t think I’ll ever remember anything prior to when we parted,” Daehwi says as his greeting, reaching out to the bubble tea which suddenly materializes in front of him. “Is that why you brought me here?”

“Maybe,” Jinyoung takes a seat right next to him, nudging him playfully as he takes a sip from his drink. “Maybe not.”

Daehwi snorts and shoves him back, but does little to no effect to Jinyoung of course, who only chuckles in response. Daehwi sticks a tongue out at him before taking a sip from his drink. “Sweet,” he stares at the green drink and asks, “Honeydew?”

“That’s what I used to order back then.”

“Then why is this the one you ordered for me?”

“So you’ll have an idea of what it actually tastes like!”

Daehwi just stares at Jinyoung nonchalantly, unsure if he’s the one with the problem or his boyfriend. “Shouldn’t I be trying what I used to order back then first?”

Jinyoung raises his tumbler. “That’s why I got wintermelon too!” he takes a sip himself and nods. “This is what you used to get before. It’s almost the same as honeydew except honeydew’s kinda sweeter.”

Daehwi looks at Jinyoung’s tumbler and reaches for it. “That sounds totally like me so let me—“ he stops however, when Jinyoung suddenly raises it above their heads – out of Daehwi’s reach. “What are you doing?” he asks, surprisingly getting quite annoyed. Jinyoung only laughs however and shrugs. “So are you not going to let me try that then?”

“Who says I’m not?” Jinyoung takes another sip and when Daehwi tries to reach it again, he immediately pulls it away.

Daehwi sighs. “Then how am I going to know what that tastes like when you refuse to share?”

Seeing the scrunch on Daehwi’s forehead, Jinyoung asks, “Are you mad?”

Daehwi sees the worry in Jinyoung’s eyes, sees how he’s suddenly so placid and he can’t help but laugh internally. “Yes.” He turns away, unconfident to lie.  

Daehwi’s not mad. He wants to really, he wants to huff and act as if he’s very much annoyed, but how can he when in fact, he actually likes how Jinyoung has been so playful with him? How Jinyoung has brought nothing but warmth and happiness in his life?

How can he get mad when he actually loves everything that is Jinyoung?

“I know you’re not.”

Daehwi turns back to him in defeat and sees Jinyoung sporting a playful smirk. “I won’t let you have a taste of this… without me.”

Confused, Daehwi only watches as Jinyoung takes a big sip from his wintermelon drink before putting it down. “What are you—“ and he gets interrupted when Jinyoung suddenly grabs his cheeks and connects their lips, giving Daehwi a wet, cold sloppy kiss.

Daehwi gasps in shock and Jinyoung takes this as his chance to slip through his lips and deepen their kiss, their tongues fervently molding against each other. They’ve kissed for so many times already, had made out at every given chance they had, but Daehwi’s heart still races every single time, body igniting at the touch of even just Jinyoung’s fingertips.

More so this time, since everything felt just right. Their hot breaths cooled down by the cold and iciness of the drink, and Jinyoung’s soft lips perfectly in contrast to his amorous kiss.

Jinyoung’s whole being just burns Daehwi’s soul.

And Daehwi, despite still unable to remember anything, suddenly understands why he had always picked Wintermelon as his flavor.

Jinyoung pulls away abruptly, causing for Daehwi to unconsciously follow after his lips. “Calm down—“ Daehwi cuts him off and gives him a long smooch before biting the older’s lips. “Ow! What was that for?”

“For teasing me.”

Daehwi sticks his tongue out, but doesn’t move nonetheless, uncaring or rather, still oblivious to the fact that the two of them had somehow moved to the grassy area right beside the stone staircase, with Jinyoung lazily sprawled over Daehwi who was comfortably laying down on the ground.

Fortunately, the area was secluded and only the lights from the fireworks that continuously exploded in the sky illuminated Jinyoung’s face, masking it with various shades of soft and warm colors.

Yet it was more than enough to let Daehwi see his own reflection in Jinyoung’s iridescent eyes.

Him and only him.

“I only did it because I want you to know that even if you remember the past or not, I’ll be with you.” Jinyoung removes the stray hairs on Daehwi’s forehead as he speaks, gaze full of fondness for his special person. “From now on, whatever happens, I won’t let you go. Never again.” He places a kiss on Daehwi’s forehead and smiles.

“I love you and I’ll always be with you.”

“I love you too.”

If it were up to Daehwi, his opinion still stays the same. Instead of wallowing over what was lost and adrift, he chooses to move on forward. It doesn’t matter to him if his memories return or not. If the unfinished tale of the past remains unwritten somewhere within the darkness inside his mind.

Because he knows it’s not yet the end.

Because he knows that the future holds a lot of promises.

And because he knows he can just rewrite it again.

Together with the one and only person who will stay.

Together with the one and only person who became his miracle.

Together with the one and only person who can complete his story.

“Back then when I asked your name when we first met, you told me your name was Daehyun… why is that?” Jinyoung suddenly asks, getting off of Daehwi and laying down beside him. “Who’s Daehyun anyway?”

Daehwi shakes his head and laughs. “I don’t know? Probably just a random name I thought of back then.” He turns to his side as Jinyoung supports his head with his arm. “Ask my name again.”

Despite the confusion, Jinyoung still asks. “What’s your name?”

Daehwi hovers over Jinyoung’s face for a moment, tracing each and every part with his loving gaze before finally settling in the warmth of his deep, dark brown eyes.

“Daehwi,” he smiles. “Bae Jinyoung’s Lee Daehwi.”

**Author's Note:**

> ALL CHAPTERS ARE UNBETAED!  
> If there are any wrong information I used here, please do let me know!  
> English is not my first language so you will most likely see a LOT of tense and grammar mistakes.  
> Please forgive me for those.  
> If you liked this story, thank you!  
> If you don't, come fite me (ง •̀_•́)ง
> 
> Rant and shout at me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/MeongJinHwi)  
> I don't bite.


End file.
